River Sence Puns

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Elements of a good photo

snowy night

Making a good photo can be both really easy and really hard. Sometimes you just get lucky and you press the shutter on the right time, other times it's the result of months of planning and preparation, but the results will always share some basic elements that make it a good photo.

• Subject: A photo must have a subject, a point of interest that makes you look at the photo for longer than a blink of the eye. When there are people, they become the subject by default unless they are really small, animals have the same effect when there are no people. The subject must be clear, in focus, lit clearly.

• Composition: This is the way the photo is framed, how the elements in a photo are arranged, how colours are used and so on. We understand the effect of a lot of these elements and call them "the rules of composition". They must be used correctly, intentional or not

• Exposure: The subject, and all important elements in the photo, must be illuminated to show it in a pleasing way

• Focus: The subject (or important parts of that subject) must be in focus, meaning the maximum amount of detail must be visible. With people and animals, the eyes must be that point

• Background: The background can be part of the story, or must be made to not attract attention by making it one colour, dark, blurred out or otherwise pull attention to the subject

• Story: When the scene or person on itself isn't really really beautiful, you'll want a story in your photo, and that story has to make sence. That's what makes a lot of photos bad, the stories don't match up, they make no sense, and the viewers notice that.

When is a photo a good photo or a snapshot?

First of all, a big part of liking a photo or not is personal. It’s about taste and you can not impose taste on others, so I won’t try to do that. That being said, all good photos do have a fixed set of things right one one way or another, so that’s the place we’ll start. Any good photo attracts your attention and holds it. There are multiple ways to do that so what attracts and what keeps your attention can be different things, but they are present. This can be 100% luck. That is why some snapshots are really good photos. But a good photographer can manipulate the camera, subject or light in such a way that he or she gets a good photo in any situation.

Casefile 1

This is the most expensive ph

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

You take away their little brooms

It was about a weak back.

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)