..they’re just shellfish
... Now I'm losing money hand over fist!
Nell, Edna, Leon, Nedra, Anita, Rolf, Nora, Alice, Carol, Leo, Jane, Reed, Dena, Dale, Basil, Rae, Penny, Lana, Dave, Denny, Lena, Ida, Bernadette, Ben, Ray, Lila, Nina, Jo, Ira, Mara, Sara, Mario, Jan, Ina, Lily, Arne, Bette, Dan, Reba, Diane, Lynn, Ed, Eva, Dana, Lynne, Pearl, Isabel, Ada, Ned, Dee, Rena, Joel, Lora, Cecil, Aaron, Flora, Tina, Arden, Noel, and Ellen.
He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?" The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. A sound unlike anything he's ever heard before.
The Sirens that nearly seduced Odysseus into crashing his ship comes to his mind. He doesn't sleep that night; he tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly be making such a seductive sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." Distraught, the man is forced to leave. Years later, after never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back to the monastery and pleads for the answer again. The monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk.” The man says, "If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to become a monk, then please, make me a monk." The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of grains of sand. When you find these answers, you will have become a monk."
The man sets about his task. After years of searching he returns as a gray-haired old man and knocks on the door of the monastery. A monk answers. He is taken before a gathering of all the monks." In my quest to find what makes that beautiful sound, I traveled the earth and have found what you asked for: By design, the world is in a state of perpetual change. Only God knows what you ask. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception."
The monks reply, "Congratulations. You have become a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sacred sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is beyond that door." The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to doors of emerald, pearl and diamond. Finally, they come to a door made of solid gold. The sound has become very clear and definite. The monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is apprehensive; his life's wish is behind that door! With trembling hands, he unlocks the door, turns the knob, and slowly pushes the door open. Falling to his knees, he is
... keep reading on reddit ➡They are afraid of the stakes
Seriously, I don't know they could have made it Eddie Vedder.
She was very shellfish
Small stakes.
Things became pretty tents.
... which is a pain staking process.
Some people may find chicken or pork beyond delicious.
Unless you Count Dracula.
She was shellfish.
that's it. that's the whole joke
They are afraid of stake holder meetings.
Because the cows ate a lot of grass.
There was a lot at stake in the relationship, but now she’s just an old flame.
I explained to him that it was the Americans who made the movie.
I'm the main stake holder.
I always misplace my tent and have to put it somewhere else. You could say I raised the stakes.
Dad: I’m gonna have to return all of these poles. They’re too tall.
Me: They seem fine.
Dad: No. The stakes are too high.
Max turns and says, " Miss Stakes, we're made"
Stake n shake!
(I'm not sure if this is a regional restaurant but I assure you it exists.)
"Yeah, I guess I could be a repost," said the other new joke.
A bon-friar, if you will
You're so shellfish!
The steaks are too high.
So, I've taken the hint...
I got her a magazine rack!
I told her, “It doesn’t get Eddie Vedder than this.”
Because they are shellfish
She was shellfish.
I'm the main stake holder.
I am now the main stake holder.
Because they’re shellfish.
