I studied Morse code so I could tap out dad jokes with my ham radio, but I only learned half of the code.
So I'm no expert at it, just a pundit.
Today I saw an ad that said "radio for sale, $1, volume knob stuck on full."
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
My 12 year old daughter got me today. Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer was playing on the radio.
"What was the other reindeer's name?"
"Um, Dasher?"
No."
"Dancer?"
"No. Olive."
"Olive?"
"Yes! Olive, the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names."
I was very proud.
Heard the song "Don't Start Now" on the radio.
Told my kids: "If I have to listen to this song one more time, I am going to Dua Lipa off the roof".
I boughta broken radio for a dollar that had the volume stuck all the way up!
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
Did you know that there was a wedding that was broadcast over the radio?
The ceremony turned out wonderful but the reception was awful.
One of the local radio stations had a "Worst Pun" contest.
The best part was you could submit multiple entries, and I sent in a bunch, at least 10. I figured the more I came up with, one of them had to win.
But, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
What did the phone say to the radio when they got hooked up?
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
A teenage girl came across an elderly man sitting next to his radio, tapping his cane to a Lil Wayne song.
"Wow! I didn't think you'd like rap music!"
"I didn't, either," the old man replied. "It all started after my hip op".
My wife believes she's a satellite radio.
At first I thought she was kidding, but apparently she's sirius.
I turned on the car radio this morning but I think it’s broken.
All I heard was “FFFFFF”. Just white noise.
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
I turned my daughter into a radio
She's not very e-static about it.
I should change my name to Billy and get a job as a radio show presenter.
Then I can finally be a Billy-on-air.
Radios play music.
And that's a stereo type.
Our toddler was complaining about the music on the radio, saying she didn’t like it.
I told her you need to listen to The Rolling Stones because you can’t always get what you want.
What do you call a prostitute that shoots radio waves out of her nipples?
I’m having trouble with my satellite radio.
In a radio contest for a new fence. Need a clever caption. Help me out??
I was driving with my wife and suddenly Pearl Jam started playing on the radio.
I told her, “It doesn’t get Eddie Vedder than this.”
My friend was very excited that he passed his ham radio exam first try...
My Friend Told Me He Identifies As A Broadcasting Radio Station
I told him “You can’t be Sirius”
Who's the cleanest radio host?
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
I saw a radio the other day on sale for $1. It had a note stuck on it saying, “Volume stuck on full”
I though, “I can’t turn that down”
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
Yesterday I saw a radio on sale for a dollar. The sign said that the volume was stuck on full.
I thought, well, I can’t turn that down.
I saw a radio on sale for only a dollar. Only catch was the volume was stuck on high.
I realized, I can’t turn this down.
I was listening to the radio...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
I found a vintage radio for sale the other day that was stuck on full volume.
I saw an advert that read "Radio for sale, $1.00, volume stuck of full"
I thought, "I can't turn that down"
Saw a radio for sale for only $2, wanted to buy it but the volume was stuck on full. Thought to myself...
... boy I just can't turn that down
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
I saw an add that said “Radio for sale, $2, Volume stuck on full”
I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way into town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
Today I saw an ad that said “radio for sale, $1, volume is stuck at max level”
I thought, well I just can’t turn that down
Today I saw an ad that said "radio for sale, $1, volume stuck on full."
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
I saw a radio for sale today for $1. Sign said its stuck on full volume.
I thought to myself "well I can't turn that down!"
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