Paying It Forward Puns

So the other week the lady and I went for a hike up in the Berkeley Hills and we came across some cows. There were two cows that were affectionate towards each other and their hair colors matched ours (she has red hair, I have black) and she said oh look, that's us if we were cows!

Fast forward to this morning. We were lazy getting out of bed (one too many fernets last night) and I mentioned we should pay a visit to our cow buddies.

She replies with the biggest shit eating grin I've ever seen her do: "Dont you mean our COW-nterparts?!"

I had to push her off me and get outta bed after that one. (Mostly jealous that I didn't think of it)

but a string of words in sign-language is a deaf sentence.

Edit: please don't thank me, just pay it forward.

I took one of the chocolates without him noticing and placed it upon my head. I then turned to him with a very stern face and said "Dad i need to talk to you about something"

dad: "what son?"

me: "I am actually really afraid for my life"

dad: "what are you talking about?"

me: "i think someone has been payed to kill me"

dad: "what , why?"

me: "I guess you could say someone has" tilting head forward to reveal the chocolate "placed a bounty on my head"

He cried a little with laughter and said he missed having me around (he recently moved country with my mum) because mum dosn't make those kind of jokes. It was a beautiful father son bonding moment.