How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing, it's on the house.
ποΈ 12k
π
οΈ Dec 23 2020
Somebody stole my Microsoft office and they're going to pay.
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Jan 28 2021
My friend just can't afford to pay his huge water bill...
I've sent him a Get Well Soon card.
ποΈ 56
π
οΈ Jan 22 2021
Have you heard about the Grizzly zoo that couldn't afford to pay the keepers?
It's pretty bear bones, now.
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Jan 31 2021
What do you call a fiance that always pays for your stuff?
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Feb 01 2021
My friend worked at the zoo to circumcise elephants, the pay was bad but...
ποΈ 11k
π
οΈ Sep 06 2020
I went to the rock-wall place but my debit card was declined, so I had to pay with the coins in my carβs center console.
It was my climb-it change.
ποΈ 17
π
οΈ Jan 10 2021
How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
ποΈ 11
π
οΈ Jan 27 2021
A woman walks into a music shop and finds an album for 95 cents and pays for it with a dollar
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Jan 26 2021
I need to pay for my horse's accommodation.
ποΈ 12
π
οΈ Jan 14 2021
Our landlord knocked on our door today and said that if we didn't pay rent, they'd turn off the heater tomorrow
ποΈ 39
π
οΈ Dec 03 2020
What happened when Santa didn't pay to park his sleigh?
ποΈ 17
π
οΈ Dec 22 2020
How do you pay someone that is giving you a circumcision?
Tell emβ to keep the tip.
ποΈ 26
π
οΈ Dec 09 2020
What do you call a noodle you pay for sex?
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Dec 31 2020
What happened when the girl didnβt pay her exorcist
ποΈ 14
π
οΈ Dec 23 2020
BR EAK ING NE WS....'Bill Gates has agreed to pay for the finishing of Trumps Wall."
(on the condition he gets to install Windows in it)
ποΈ 10
π
οΈ Nov 24 2020
For my next car, Iβm going to buy a Honda directly from Japan and pay all the necessary tariffs.
It will be my Civic duty.
ποΈ 22
π
οΈ Dec 04 2020
What do you call a girl who refuses to pay her bills?
Burnadebt
(Just thought of this and I gotta admit...I'm a little bit proud of myself.)
ποΈ 7k
π
οΈ Jun 13 2020
I keep asking my flatmate to pay his rent
And he keeps turning sideways to avoid me
ποΈ 25
π
οΈ Nov 05 2020
I was working behind the bar today when two guys came in and tried to pay with a couple of counterfeit Β£10 notes. When I told the manager, he asked what they looked like..
βLike Β£10 notesβ I told him
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Dec 15 2020
The prosecutor offered the ballet dancer two choices after she did not pay her mountain of parking tickets. A) Say guilty, pay them off, and get probation for 6 months or B) Say Not Guilty and go to trial and perhaps serve 6 months in jail.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Nov 26 2020
Before air was free at the gas station, and now you have to pay for it? You know why?
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Nov 18 2020
Did you know that in some countries, mathematicians are forced to pay fines for being unlawful to Jesus?
Yeah, itβs called a Sin-tax.
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Nov 23 2020
Did you hear about the pay as you go toilet in space?
The price was gastronomical!
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Nov 27 2020
The Czech republic is introducing a train ticketing system so you can pay with bitcoin...
...it uses blocktrain Czechnology.
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Nov 24 2020
The police officer made me pay up for my crime.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Nov 25 2020
I have just found the Catholic version of pay per view.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Oct 29 2020
I told my bowmen that I would pay anytime they need to get some practice in at the course.
Theyβre free range archers now.
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Oct 11 2020
My son asked we to pay for his rifle test today. It was $30.
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Nov 13 2020
I crack bad jokes about having to borrow my parents old clothes because my job doesn't pay well...
What can I say? I've got my father's jeans.
ποΈ 19
π
οΈ Oct 28 2020
Pay attention in class kids
ποΈ 53
π
οΈ Sep 06 2020
I got picked for this five-day-a-week, year-long sleep study. It pays $15,000 a month.
ποΈ 1k
π
οΈ Jun 06 2020
Got a pay rise of $1000 today, effective immediately.
What a grand start to the weekend.
ποΈ 36
π
οΈ Sep 11 2020
Compressed air at gas stations used to be FREE, but now you have to pay $2!
ποΈ 82
π
οΈ Aug 15 2020
A rich man who got sent to jail decided to pay to upgrade his prison cell.
He is now behind gold bars.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Oct 01 2020
What did the pirate pay for his earrings?
ποΈ 10
π
οΈ Sep 19 2020
What does a pirate pay for his corn?
ποΈ 18
π
οΈ Oct 02 2020
During Coronavirus, always pay businesses with cash where possible.
It will help them make a gross profit.
ποΈ 11
π
οΈ Aug 12 2020
A friend of mine didn't pay for his daughter's exorcism
ποΈ 19
π
οΈ Sep 30 2020
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill
So I sent him a "get well soon" card
ποΈ 15k
π
οΈ Sep 07 2020
My friend said that he couldn't afford to pay his huge water bill....
So, I sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.
ποΈ 1k
π
οΈ Nov 11 2020
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing. Itβs on the house!
ποΈ 295
π
οΈ Dec 10 2020
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing, itβs on the house
ποΈ 63
π
οΈ Dec 24 2020
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing, itβs on the house.
ποΈ 19
π
οΈ Dec 22 2020
How much does Santa pay to park his sleigh?
Nothing. Itβs on the house.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Dec 23 2020
My friend couldnβt afford to pay his water bill.
I sent him a βget well soonβ card.
ποΈ 228
π
οΈ Sep 07 2020
I have decided to buy a new Honda directly from Japan and pay all the tariffs.
It will be my Civic duty.
ποΈ 25
π
οΈ Oct 09 2020
My friend couldnβt afford to pay his water bill.
I sent him a βGet well soonβ card
ποΈ 14
π
οΈ Sep 09 2020
My friend couldnβt afford to pay his water bill.
I sent him a βGet well soonβ card
ποΈ 15
π
οΈ Sep 09 2020
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