Do you hap-pun to love puns
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︎ Apr 20 2021
A lil joke for my swiss ppl out there (you have all my love)
https://preview.redd.it/phwxjjhktcz61.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=f977c05db5fe9ea3e65904f04f47b6f6d9438c4d
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︎ May 15 2021
What can you do for a tortoise that was falling in love but now is only falling apart?
Nothing you can do, itβs a turtle eclipse of the heart
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︎ May 20 2021
I Canβt Herb Falling in Love With You
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︎ Apr 03 2021
What do you call a mushroom that loves to party?
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︎ Mar 31 2021
If you change word "Love" to "Lunch", you can totally change the meaning of a lot of songs.
All You Need Is Lunch
Do You Believe In Life After Lunch
Lunch In An Elevator
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︎ Jan 23 2021
I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror one evening admiring my reflection, when I posed this question to my wife of 30 years, βWill you still love me when Iβm old, fat, and balding?β She smiled and answered...
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︎ Mar 27 2021
What do you call a monk that loves chips?
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︎ Feb 10 2021
When your friends know you love puns and send you things like this >>>>>>
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︎ Jan 17 2021
"I love you from my heart to-ma-toes"
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︎ Oct 17 2020
My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, βIf you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!β
I replied, βI'm on the toilet, please adviseβ¦β
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︎ Jun 15 2020
βI love my job!β exclaimed the farmer. βAll you do is boss me around all day!β complained one of his sheep. βWhat did you say?β challenged the farmer. The sheep glared back and growled...
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︎ Oct 25 2020
How do you measure the power of love?
In jewels
It's an engineering joke
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︎ Feb 24 2021
Choose a major you love
and you'll never work a day in your life because that field probably isn't hiring
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︎ Dec 29 2020
I was having a glass of wine with my wife after a long day and I heard her say "I love you so much and always look forward to being with you at the end of the day. I don't know what I'd do without you." "Is that you or the wine talking?" I asked. She replied "It's me...
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︎ Feb 11 2021
I love you
At least... thatβs a joke my dad told me all the time
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︎ Dec 12 2020
If you donate a kidney, everybody loves you and youβre a total hero.
But try donating five kidneys and suddenly everyone is yelling and the police get involved.
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︎ Nov 19 2020
Take it easy people. Pretty soon you'll be able to kiss and have sex with the one you love.
But for now, stay at home and do it with the one you're married to.
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︎ Dec 23 2020
Do you know what car someone who loves rhythmical music should own ?
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︎ Jan 03 2021
Do you know what Cthulhu loves on his steak?
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︎ Jan 15 2021
First, I posted this on r/jokes but it didn't get much love. Then I realized I posted it on the wrong joke sub. Y'all love the punny jokes, so here you go:
Why are lamb chops a thing? Why do we have a food named after a baby animal?
Would you ever eat something called puppy steak? Or kitten burger? Or chick fillet?
oh wait.........
Credit goes to Matt from Studio C
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︎ Dec 21 2020
If you love Christmas so much...
Why donβt you merry it?
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︎ Dec 07 2020
What do you call two dudes who love math?
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︎ Aug 22 2020
"Honk if you love Jesus"
"Keep texting while driving, if you are desperate to meet him."
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︎ Dec 26 2020
In France, They donβt say βI love youβ
Because they donβt speak english there.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
Would you call a chiropractor who loves this job
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︎ Oct 25 2020
What do you call a mycology student who loves to party
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︎ Nov 24 2020
Son, I love you, and I think you rock
But I promise I will never take you for Granite again
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︎ Oct 13 2020
How do you know if your love interest is into you?
Invite them to the gym. If they show up...
β¦
...then you know you're working out.
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︎ Dec 08 2020
What do you call an American bee that loves sea ?
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︎ Dec 03 2020
What do you call a ghostβs true love?
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︎ Oct 13 2020
This isnβt mine and I donβt know who made it, but itβs been on my phone for so many years and I havenβt seen it on here yet. I hope you all love it as much as I do.
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︎ Aug 15 2020
How do you know when a cat loves you?
When it thinks you're its pajamas!
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︎ Oct 16 2020
Gandhi's Mum: How much do you Love me
Gandhi: From the bottom of Mahatma
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︎ Nov 21 2020
There is one place in this world where you can truly love yourself.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
In the store I saw some brightly coloured greeting cards that said, "I will always love only you "
They sold them in packs of 12.
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︎ Nov 09 2020
How do you know all woodpeckers love heavy metal music?
Because theyβre all head bangers. (Credit to my 11 year old).
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︎ Oct 18 2020
Did you hear about the two houses that fell in love with each other?
It was a lawn-distance relationship
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︎ Aug 30 2020
How do you check if a sniper loves you?
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︎ May 21 2020
4yo: βI love you moreβ
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︎ Sep 26 2020
What do you call the love between two people that never engage in sexual activity and love eating a lot?
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︎ Sep 04 2020
What do you call a bear that both loves and hates to travel?
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︎ Sep 23 2020
What do you call a painter who loves running through the grass?
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︎ Aug 07 2020
[Meta] love for you jokester dads
The only think I miss about my (otherwise awful) father is his sense of humor. Thank you from the bottom of my heart (and the top of my face palms) for every groaner, pun, and repeat.
Love,
All us fatherless (for whatever reason) redditors
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︎ Aug 09 2020
What do you call a person who loves both himself and waffles more than anything else in the world?
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︎ Aug 03 2020
What do you call a monkey that loves chips?
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︎ Sep 28 2020
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