Immediate Delivery Puns

After the delivery of yet another stupid dad joke today my nine year old rolled his eyes HARD, shook his head and said, "I quit... I quit being your son."

Then I found him repeating the joke to himself and immediately telling himself to shut up while grinning.

It was glorious.

*Edit: Asked how many choplet cook chippies he wanted. He wanted three with a glass of milk

and things are going great for the first few days, handling deliveries, putting cuts into and out of storage, etc. After his first week, coming in at 8am to work with the Butcher's supervision, the Butcher decides that he can trust John with a little more responsibility. The Butcher is a bit of a perfectionist and he tells John that he has to be there by 6am Monday morning because a delivery of fresh beef was due to arrive at 6:15 and it needed storage and processing immediately. John was incredibly excited and set extra alarms Monday. He snoozes his 5am alarm, but his 5:15 alarm gets him going, and he arrives at the shop at 5:55, tired and slightly panicked. He gets into the back room and takes a catnap.

He is shaken awake at 7:45am by the Butcher, who is asking where the cuts are. The deliveryman didn't see John and so the beef wasn't delivered or cut. The Butcher was incredibly disappointed in John, and had to fired him because he had caused too many missed steaks.

Out for a hike in an urban provincial park in Calgary with my wife, my cousin, and my cousin's husband. We slow down to look at a deer about 5m off the trail. A middle age couple is walking towards us, when:

Woman: Look honey, a deer!
Her husband: Oh dear!

His wife, my wife, and my cousin all groan/eye roll... and me and my cousin's husband have a hearty chuckle, while the man sports a wide grin.

Based on his immediate delivery, and his wife's reaction, I just know this joke's been repeated often, to everyone's delight, as any good dad joke should be.