I picked this pun, although it could use a little door imagination.
I just got back from the doctor, and was diagnosed with a faulty imagination
I can't make this shit up
What do you call a figment of your imagination that's difficult to carry around?
What do you call a rabbit whose owners have no imagination?
To avoid strain when thinking about working out involves a stretch of my imagination.
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be mass confusion.
Imagine a form of public transportation where there is no monetary fee but you relive past mistakes for as long as you are a passenger
Imagine how stressful it would be to be a ski.
I mean, there’s so much pressure on you all the time.s
Imagine being held at gunpoint by (bear with me) a literate animal, and the only hope of rescue is (BEAR WITH ME) posting a coded message on social media.
wHo the hEll would beLieve such a thing can hapPen.
Imagine if you walked into a bar and there was a long line of people waiting to take a swing at you.
I like to imagine that the guy who invented the umbrella was going to call it the 'brella'....
Imagine you're in a pitch dark room and you have no idea how to escape.
I overdosed on Viagra once....
I imagine when Microsoft's co-founder Mr.Gates gets a suit tailored, they must fit him perfectly.
They have to fit the Bill.
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp
Imagine how tired Michelangelo was by the time he had finished painting..
"Honey, who might bee at the front door?"
If alcohol can damage your short term memory
Imagine the damage alcohol can do.
Whenever I go to bed I imagine I'm a cop
Can you imagine if your dog was an undercover reporter?
They’d be able to dig up so much dirt on you.
Can you just imagine how pterosaurs felt seeing that meteor entering the earths atmosphere?
A farmer said to me “I have 68 sheep. Can you help round them up for me?”
Her: Honey can you pick up some milk
Him:* lifts gallon * done
Her: no from the store
Him: I imagine it weighs the same there too
Imagine if vampires had blunt teeth and couldn't bite you
My son came up to me and said that a bug was flying around his room, my wife said that he just imagined it.
I said that is justaflyable.
Told my wife I was quitting my job today to become an electrician
Not cool Dad...not cool
So my dad's telling my relatives the story of how my mom was in labor for 12 hours so they named me 'Laura' which if you say it in Vietnamese accent it's 'Lau-ra' which means "Long time to come out"...
IMAGINE FINDING OUT AFTER 21 YEARS YOUR NAME IS A FUCKING PUN ..
I went to see a psychiatrist to get over my crippling fear of palindromes.
The bastard put me on Xanax!
This is (practically) the corniest gift imaginable. At the bottom of the soon to be gift wrapped box of corniness was a pair of Korn tickets for my lady...who enjoys my corny puns.
You always have to keep your job exciting.
Being a well driller, I often dream I could drill right to the center of the earth.
If I didn't have such a great imagination my job would be just boring.
When You Dream
When you dream in color, is it a pigment of your imagination?
Imagine eating a clock...
That would be time consuming...
Can't imagine someone not understanding what erectile dysfunction is
I have a step ladder...
I never knew my real ladder, but my step ladder raised me.
Name woes... translation: imagine the difficulty when she is ashes what her name is by French people..
Pigs
Person 1: I will marry you when pigs fly.
Me: Swine Flu...
(end up getting married to my bae...con)
Not a true story. Something from the pig-ment of my imagination.
My half brother is 6ft 3inches...
Just imagine if he was a full brother.
Imagine having a job at a Candy Store
How profoundly disappointing to know...
...that the band 'Toto' was not made up of former members of the band 'Kansas'.
My friend was shot clean through his skull but survived.
I can’t imagine what was going through his mind at the time.
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be mass confusion
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms over night
There would be MASS confusion
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight
There would be a mass confusion
Imagine if America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.
There'd be mass confusion.
Imagine the titanic with a lisp..
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.
There would be a mass confusion
Imagine eating a clock
That would be time consuming.
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