21 Hilarious I Cry Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

Do you remember when you were a kid and whenever you cried, your parents would say, “I’ll give you a reason to cry!?" I always thought they were going to hit me...

...not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.

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👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod

📅︎ Mar 17 2021

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I always cry when I watch documentaries about earthquakes

They are all so moving.

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👤︎ u/dalownerx3

📅︎ Mar 27 2021

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I... I think imma cry 😢

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👤︎ u/TheWizardSquirrel

📅︎ Jan 20 2021

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Good news! I made a potion that makes you cry cakes!

However the first person who tried it is still crying endless tiers!

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👤︎ u/jlionbad

📅︎ Feb 18 2021

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*This is a literal Dad Joke my father used to tell when I was a kid about 30 years ago. He's almost 80 now and it still makes him laugh.* - So, there was this man named James Fart. Everybody made fun of him since he was very young. "James Fart! James Fart" the bullies used to make him cry...

He came of age among this suffering and at 21 was finally able to legally change his name. He arrived at the government office where he presented himself:

-I'm James Fart and I want to legally change my name!

Of course they laughed at him (everybody did) but eventually they all settled and came around to the situation.

-Ok, so... your current name is.. ·chuckles· James Fart... I'm sorry, I just...

-I know, everybody has been laughing at my name since as long as I can remember.

After a long and tedious process, everything is ready.

-Very well, sorry for the delays but you know how hard this protocols are. The good news: you are no longer "James Fart", what name do you want instead?

-Charles Fart.

👍︎ 8k

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👤︎ u/gone11gone11

📅︎ May 06 2020

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I once sat next to a baby on a 10 hour flight. I had no idea that it was possible for someone to cry for 10 hours straight.

Even the baby was impressed.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto

📅︎ Oct 06 2020

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Why do I always cry when I wake up?

It’s too early in the mourning!

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👤︎ u/papserk

📅︎ Aug 30 2020

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The beginning of the book is so sad that I've just been able to cry for years...

But I think it's time to turn the page.

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👤︎ u/EspectadorExpectante

📅︎ Apr 30 2020

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I just dad joked my accounting professor and made her cry from laughing.

Someone asked about extra credit.

Professor: "I'm sorry I don't give extra credit in this class"

Me: "yeah but do you give extra debit?"

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👤︎ u/TheAugustusCaesar

📅︎ Feb 20 2017

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I need a shoulder to cry on

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👤︎ u/bbbbra

📅︎ Jun 10 2019

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My 2 year old daughter was having a tantrum. I yelled "I'll give you something to cry about!". She wailed louder.

So I handed her a knife and an onion.

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👤︎ u/JackFunk

📅︎ Nov 19 2019

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We attended my sister's boyfriend's funeral at 9 A.M. yesterday, but she didn't seem very upset and didn't cry at all. I asked her why and she said,

She's not really a mourning person.

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👤︎ u/LadySparta729

📅︎ Aug 08 2019

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I didn't cry over my spilled milk, my milk did i.reddituploads.com/67e5c…

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👤︎ u/allminionsmustdie

📅︎ Jan 08 2017

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What starts with P, ends with S, and makes kids cry when I give it to them?

Presents!

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👤︎ u/RSTLNE3MCAAV

📅︎ May 10 2019

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I’m going to rename my tears “Pixar shorts” because it’s the only time I cry.

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👤︎ u/beardwithablog

📅︎ Jun 15 2018

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I like to fly up to Alaska every once in a while just to cry my eyes out...

I find it very catharctic.

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👤︎ u/OK_Compooper

📅︎ Apr 01 2017

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I told my dad my son sounds like a goat when he cries.

Response? "He's just a little kid."

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👤︎ u/haileybop

📅︎ Apr 20 2015

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Do you remember when you were a kid and whenever you cried, your parents would say, “I’ll give you a reason to cry!?"

I always thought they were going to hit me, not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.

👍︎ 11k

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter

📅︎ Feb 18 2018

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I just sat next to a baby on a 12 hour flight. I had no idea that someone could cry for 12 hours straight.

Even the baby seemed impressed.

👍︎ 76

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto

📅︎ Sep 27 2019

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Do you remember when you were a kid and whenever you cried, your parents would say, “I’ll give you a reason to cry!"

I always thought they were going to hit me, not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.

👍︎ 112

💬︎

👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod

📅︎ May 01 2019

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I sat next to baby on a ten hour flight. I had no idea someone could cry for ten hours straight.

Even the baby seemed surprised that I could do it.

👍︎ 47

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto

📅︎ Jul 14 2018

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