Wikipedia has an interesting article on something that I have observered in many homosexual couples, especially lesbians. The concept of homonormativity, summarized:
Homonormativity is the privileging of heteronormative ideals and constructs onto LGBT culture and identity. It is predicated on the assumption that the norms and values of heterosexualitity should be replicated and performed among homosexual people. [...] Rubin writes that these poles of acceptability and deviancy see a homonormative privileging of long-term gay couples over the bodies of transgendered, non-binary, and promiscuous members of these groups.
It's often confused for the concept of heteronormativity, which is when straight people assume others to be heterosexual, and interpreted gay culture in a straight manner, such as asking who is the man in a relationship with two men or two women. But in the case of homonormativity, it's something homosexuals force on themselves.
It's something I have observed so many times in homosexual couples and I think it contributes to biphobia as well. Examples of what I have observed:
- Women who claim that butch-butch couples don't look normal and aren't "right"
- The expectation that all homosexuals should make use of IVF/surrogacy and start a family
- Lesbian couples where one of the women clearly plays the role of a "father"
- Use of gay marriage to promote monogamy and seeing this as the only right way
- Promotion of gender roles in their relationship to the point of NB/transphobia
Based on all of this, it's no wonder that homosexuals tend to be biphobic. When I was openly bisexual as a teenager, I admit that I was never monogamous but my partners knew this. I simply don't believe in marriage but I had nothing against serial monogamy. I was somewhat promiscious and of course this made me the bad bisexual.
All of this homonormativity contributes to bi erasure but it also tends to erase others of their own group. It's one of the reasons that femme lesbians are seen as not gay enough, and if they are, it's often expected that they pair up with a butch. It's as if people want to be a stereotype in order to be acknowledged by a greater, often privilged community.
Bisexuals should not shun polyamory (unless they themselves believe in monogamy), or reject people who don't conform to gender (not "feminine" or "masculine" enoug
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Hello everyone. I'm new here and enjoy reading the thought provoking posts on this subreddit. Something struck me in fuzzytoe's post about the One Million Moms/JC Penny debacle: the word "homonormative," which I had not previously encountered. I am by no means an etymologist, but using the structure of the similar term "heteronormative," one would think that "homonormative" means the opposite, that is, the assumption of sexualities other than heterosexuality and gender identities outside of the binary as the norm. Instead, from what I've learned, homonormativity is the assimilation of heteronormativity by queers. This might sound like a bunch of hairsplitting, but I think using words that have meanings that differ greatly from the meaning that a general audience would discern creates unnecessary confusion in discourse.
Trigger warning: "incest" (ewwwwwww I hate just typing that)
I grew up with an older brother, 3 years older. He was my first, and best, friend before going to elementary school. When I was in elementary school I had a ton of guy friends because i had more fun doing things guys typically liked rather than what girls typically liked, due to the influence of my brother. I did have female friends though and I loved them, but I had more guy friends than other people did.
In middle school it was the same. I had both girl and guy friends. My best friend at the time was a guy. But there was a rumor going around in school that I had a crush on him. So I got confused and thought i must have had a crush on him. But then i realized that i treat him the same way i treated my brother, and I saw him as a brother. (Do you see the problem?)
When I went to high school, there was a guy i was friends with. but because we're both asian (and had high academic ranking), people shipped us together. Then I got self-conscious around him. I thought about him so much because my friends kept teasing me about him, so I thought I must have had a crush on him. One time I made a joke to him, and my friend whispered to me, "omg, you're such a flirt!" and I was really confused.
When I was younger, most likely in elementary or maybe middle school, I would hang out with my brother in his room or my room, because that's what siblings do when they get along well. My dad would always make weird comments like, "Why are you two alone while the door is closed? Why are you two on the bed together?" He made us feel ashamed for doing something when there really was nothing wrong, we were just hanging out, i mean, isnt it just fucking weird to imply things and make weird comments like that to your own children?
That, coupled with the fact that classmates kept telling me i must have romantic interest in boys i viewed and treated in the same way i treat my brother, has made me feel uncomfortable being around my brother, and men in general.
There is no reason I should feel uncomfortable with men specifically. Heteronormativity means people think guys and girls can't just be friends. If our society was homonormative or whatever i'd have the same problem but with girls. That just shows how little sense heteronormativity makes.
I am aroace. Most likely pan aroace or bi aroace or whatever the term is when you don't have any preference at all in terms of who you want to befriend / be in a QPR with if t
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Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.
If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.
Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???
Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.
Thank you,
A Dad.
Well, toucan play at that game.
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
She said apple-lutely
Windows
Sudden Lee
'Eye-do'
This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.
The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!
Cred once again my sis wants credit lol
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Keep in mind, my son is 4 years old, so everything is an original to him.
I had to work late into the evening yesterday, and he was just going to bed when I got home. I had left home for the office nearly 14 hours prior, had a long day, lots of meetings, traffic, etc.
When I walked through the door, I was exhausted, run down, and starving. My wife hugged me and asked how my day was, and I replied, "Done. It was a good day, but has got me exhausted. I just want to grab a bite and go to bed. I'm hungry."
From my son's bedroom, I hear him shout, "Hi Hungry! Nice to meet you!"
Not only did it make me laugh, but I completely forgot about how hungry and tired I was. I went to his bedroom, and we laughed together about it. It was exactly what I needed.
Edit: Thanks for all the awards, kind strangers! I'll let my son know y'all enjoyed his joke too!
Japan.
second hand stores!
it's Hans free now..
Old Neeeeiiiiighvy
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
A buck-an-ear!
I Thank ye kind Matey for the booty! I be truly overwhelmed! Thank you!
Holy cow! Thank you everyone for the upvotes and awards! I wasn’t expecting this!
and not:
He should have a good vowel movement. His next diaper change could spell disaster though.
Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
