Why did the ducks eat the dog?

Because it was pure bread

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeatsbyChrisBrown
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
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I think not letting my dog eat water melon is makings her sad.

She's a little melancholy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theMeatman7
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
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In a dog eat dog world

every dog goes canineballistic

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πŸ‘€︎ u/otherbanana1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
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What do you call a dog who only eats garlic and onions?

A dog with a bark worse than its bite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hour_Scarcity
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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What do dogs eat for breakfast?

Woofles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FarsideSC
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
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What do you call a dog that eats other dogs?

A caninbal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ovidianu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
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It's A Dog Eat Dog World
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Drinkingink
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
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How do you get a hipster to eat a hot dog?

Put it in a man bun!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/smolprincess928
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
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Ever heard of the buffet that lets you eat free if you bring your welsh cattle dog?

I hear its a real corgishborg.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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I have to stop taking my dog to the park, all the ducks keep trying to eat him

I guess that's what I get for buying a pure-bred

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pooka_pook
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
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Have you heard of the dogs that eat metal?

They're ferrousius.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tr4ckh3d
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
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What does an Italian dog eat?

Dog Ciao.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IshtakStern
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2018
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Hyper dog tries to eat batteries

At work we have a policy where you can bring your dog. Today Frank the dog was in the office. He is a super hyper dog all day long. During the day someone was changing out the batteries in the keyboard and Frank was trying to get the old batteries. Franks owner pulled him away and said no you don’t eat batteries. This was the point I spoke up and dropped the bomb.

β€œFrank, you don’t need batteries. You’re already charged up enough”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Broncothrow
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
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Sitting at the dinner table, (kid) can dogs eat corn? (Wife) No because they will turn into corn dogs (dad) that was corny
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kyler232
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
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What's the name of that dog that likes to eat other dogs? Oh thats right, it's the...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryFahrenheit
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2018
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I would love to eat one corn dog, but 144 of them is just gross.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vaxis2113
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
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What bone does a dog not eat?

A trombone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Marekatrek
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2017
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I eat my hot dogs cold

no bun intended

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bonerwashington
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2014
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It's a dog eat dog world out there...

In other words, life is ruff.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScoopskyPotatos
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2015
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Wife: The dog can not eat an entire heirloom tomato.

Me: Well of course not, those are meant to be passed down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dandaman184
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2017
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Watching some movie where a bunch of dog sledders end up having to eat the dogs

He points to the cats and goes

"If we eat them it'll be a cat-astrophe!"

Ugh

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rybaka1994
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2014
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What do dogs eat for breakfast?

Pup-Tarts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsKilLikeMine
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
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What do dogs eat for breakfast?

Woofles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScottyUrb
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2017
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What bone won't a dog eat?

A trom-bone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NewGenRain
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2014
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