The nation of Iran lies between the ancient lands of Babylon to the west and the mountains of Afghanistan to the east...

In other words, it’s between Iraq and a hard place.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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I had a friend who started crying and said he somehow once saw the sun rising in the west instead of the east.

He thought it was upsetting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MCMajorGeo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2020
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To the west is Baghdad and to the east are the Zagros Mountains

Looks like I'm stuck between Iraq and a hard place

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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What do you call a bird that can only fly North,South, East, or West?

A Cardinal (n,s,e,w are called Cardinal directions)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tuffcraft
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2018
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Today I learnt what Yoda was short for,

Because he's got little legs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BellaLugosisChips
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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Where I'm sitting he's pointing Bsouth and Bnorth.
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yugvijay
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2018
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My friend got REALLY mad at me for punning, advice needed!

My best friend lives on the East Coast. I’m on the West. He often streams his games over Skype so I can hang out and watch. He was playing the Witcher 3, and fighting the water monster men. I said β€œThey just want to know the shape of you,” and he coincidentally died at that moment.

He got really, really mad. I always knew my puns annoyed him a little, but when I was sad, he’d tell dumb puns he’d google to cheer me up. But he just went into a tangent on how much puns annoy him and how he doesn’t get that I keep doing them over and over again every day whenever I talk with him. Trying to stop or cut back on puns would be pretty difficult and make me sad; I love witty wordplay and commentary, and bottling it up feels awful. But apparently it really, really annoys him.

What should I do?

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2019
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An Impossible Riddle

Today my father asked me:

F: "Someone's mother.."

Me: "Oh no, please no" (In mind)

F (continues) : "... has four kids: west, south, and north. What is the name of the fourth kid? Tell me"

Me: "..." (Is he making fun of the riddle or himself)

F: "And let me tell you the answer is not EAST, haha"

Me: "..."

F: "It isn't easy eh?"

Me: "Kill me god, please just kill me. This is so painful"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Razor54672
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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We had an IDEA...

Back a few decades, I was working in a program with a local college in the Middle East.

The name of the program for ExPats has the clever acronym of "IDEA" (hey, I said it was clever); which stands for "Inter-Departmental Educational Adjunct". It's interdepartmental because my particular specialty not only covers field geology but also paleontology and a bit of archeology thrown in for good measure. Everyone hopes to have a good IDEA...

ahem...

Well, we saddle up and head for the Dune Sea out in the west of the country, where the Precambrian, Cambrian, Silurian, Cretaceous, Pliocene, Pleistocene, and Holocene crop out and access is relatively easy and non-injurious.

Well, we caravan out, some 30 Land Cruisers, Nissan patrol, and the odd Mitsubishi Galloper strong. We all get our maps, compasses and split up into 5 or 6 special interest groups ("SIG's"); where each IDEA has his own GPS and LIDAR laser ranging apparatus. Reason being, that there are very few benchmarks out in the desert, and even those are constantly at the mercy of the shifting and ever-blowing sands.

Since we're split into groups and at any one time, ranging up to and including some 50 km2, when a real find is located, a device called the "DIME" (Digital-Interface Monitor Encoder) is attached and programmed into the GPS for location later; it is a digital sort of low-frequency transponder, developed from technology used by offshore drillers and jacket setters where benchmarks are even more transitory.

The way it works is rather simple. When something is to be marked for later retrieval, a series of wooden posts are pounded in a triangular manner around the find and the DIME is set, programmed with the GPS and attached to one or more of the posts.

That's the theory, at least.

Everything works well, especially all the hardened electronics and computer gizmos, but attaching the DIME to the stakes is the real problem. It can't be nailed, screwed or fastened with any sort of metal contrivance as that farkles the magnetic field and causes all sorts of goofy spurious signals. Zip ties don't last long in the heat and duct tape is right out. Many sites have been lost to the shifting sands this way.

Velcro doesn't work too well, as the sand fills the hooks of the receiving piece of velcro and soon renders it useless. String or fishing line work, but that's temporary (they melt). Glue or mastic are out as these are supposed to be temporary. Even plastic sleeves don't work due to the heat out

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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A car pulled up beside me at the side of the road.

Its driver said, "Excuse me, buddy. I was wondering if you could give me a few directions?"

"Sure...North West and South East," I replied.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2018
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Studying genetics with my dad

Dad: "If your dad has brown eyes and your mom has blue eyes, what's the chance of you having brown eyes?"
Me: "75 percent"
Dad: "And what's the chance your eyes go opposite directions?"
Me: "I don't know..."
Dad: "One in four, because one blue east and one blue west!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckets41
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2014
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