E card Puns

So, I sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.

So I am trying to think of something to put on our family’s Christmas card. The only thing I can think of is “hindsight is 2020”.

I am however 100% sure you amazing people can come up with something much better for this dumpster fire of a year.

The cop said, “Sir, that’s not how you play the race card.”

I wanted my report card to spell out F art

5-card stud or stirrup poker?

I'm Biden my time, until I can play my Trump card.

With an oyster card!

But with COVID I don’t think it’s in the cards.

A few years ago, was playing a card game with my frisbee team. We were competing in a frisbee tournament for spring break, and we had discs lying all around the Airbnb we were sleeping in. After playing the first few hands, I realized I didn't know what to do with my old cards.

I asked my teammate where I should put my used up cards. They pointed to some cards lying in a frisbee.

It was a disc card, discard pile.

‘Get whale soon’ cards.

He forgot his Debbie card

A kid was manning the pump and I asked if they take cards He replies with a straight face : No we give it back after swiping

Little did those countries know, the US had a Trump card.

Because it had received a ghost card

But Happiness is just not in the cards

Came up with this one myself. I learned today there is not a single card in Magic the Gathering named Happiness.

The last time I checked my credit card bill they said it was outstanding !

Fiancé: Oh, I didn't realise she was ordering packages.

Me: She must've gone to the bank to get herself a debit card.

Fiancé: Nah, she just went to the neighbours tree.

Me: Huh?

Fiancé: The local branch.

So I took his credit card and left.

I replied, “No, I hate violence. May I just pay for it with my card?”

When going through some of my deceased father's things, I found a card that says "Gold Mouse Story" and "Do you have a little gold Mexican?". This is sort of a shorthand he used to jot down jokes on index cards - a short description and the punchline.

I have no idea what this might refer to so I am asking here. Does this sound familiar? I apologize in advance if it turns out to be racist!

Waiter asking me how would you like to pay sir? Cash or Card!

Me looking at my friend: PayPal

As my son have me my 50th birthday card, I said " You know, i would have been happy with one"

😁😆😅🤣😂🙃

My mom’s friend is trying to write a card for her husband for Valentine’s Day, and he loves gnomes. Shes trying to find gnome puns to put in the card associated with Valentine’s Day. Please help because I don’t know any good gnome puns.

You can say I never get card-bored.

I received my blood donor card in the mail today.

Me: "No thanks, I'm not much of an athlete. Is it okay if I just pay with my card?"

the one of the president of the united states is definitely my trump card

I wrote a little skit for my grandkids let's see how much I remember. CHUM 8 news Ted Hammerhead reporting with sky Chompter traffic report. Top story, a lone shark, who is a loan shark is alone in the dark making loans to sharks! There is a new place to gamble, the place is full of sharks who turn out to be card sharks playing card games with sharks on the cards. Imagune the dogs playing poker for this story, but it's sharks. The other reporter asks Ted Hammerhead how he did on his recent drivers test, Ted responds "nailed it". Crime scene where a clown has been killed and the Detective states, " No way a shark did this as they taste funny". On a comment about the victim. I never did the weather or figured out names for the other reporters we used to laugh and laugh at my stupid puns.

Edit: I can't spell fixed typos

Our Golf Pun contest is starting tonight at 5PM EST. It's free to enter. Winner gets $150 Amazon eGift Card .........

Please invite all the punsters you'd like .......... https://golfpuns.com/index.php

Just show up at game night and shout Bingo without a card.

So I sent him a "get well soon" card

So I sent him a ‘Get Well Soon!’ card.

I sent him a “get well soon” card.

I sent him a “Get well soon” card

I sent him a “Get well soon” card

So I got him a card that says "get well soon"

So I sent him a “get well soon” card.

EDIT: HOLY my first award! Thankyou stranger!