I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Hast du jemals von diesem Mann gehört? Er war einer der wichtigsten Komponisten des 20. Jahrhunderts. Er wurde 1923 in Rumänien geboren und lebte in Ungarn bis er nach Österreich ausgewandert ist. Wegen des Kommunistmus in Ungarn durfte er seinem Interesse für die Avantgarde-Musik folgen, aber nachdem er ins Westeuropa gekommen war, konnte er neue Musik schreiben und neue Methoden ausprobieren.

Er interessierte sich für die Mathematik in der Musik, aber seine Musik klingt nicht so mathematisch und kalt wie andere Komponisten (Hällochen, Schönberg und Webern). Wenn du dich mit dieser Art von Musik nicht auskennst, empfehle ich dir seine Klavierstücke, insbesondere seine Klavieretüden und "Musica Ricercata".

Die Etüden sind einige der schwierigsten Stücke der Klavierliteratur. Z.B. hat er in der ersten Etüde verschiedene Rhythmen kombiniert: drei gegen vier, vier gegen fünf, usw. Der Klavierspieler muss mit den komplizierten Rhythmen umgehen können und die Noten sehr schnell spielen. Deshalb hat er die Etüde "Désordre" benannt.

Ich habe Videos mit den Notenblätter verlinkt. Da die Etüden so wild sind, muss man nur die Muster der Noten schauen. Mit seiner Musik hat er besonders für das 20. Jahrhundert die Limits der klassischen Musik erreicht.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

I've been listening to Schubert's Impromptus recently (going to start learning one to) and was wondering if there is anything similar out there?

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

And boy are my arms legs.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Calcium, nickel, neon

I'm going to apologize in advance for all of the vagueness. Unfortunately I don't have the best background in terms of music theory.

For the past few days, I've been searching (to no avail) for a piano piece that popped back into my head after not having heard it for quite some time. Sadly, it wasn't anything in particular that spiked my memory (like a stream, movie, or YouTube video), so I don't have any actual clips of the piece to reference here. Here's everything I know.

About the Piece

Time Period: Unknown. I want to say it's a classical piece, but it's possible that it's contemporary.
Genre: Solo piano (See Edit 1)
General Tone/Feel: Melancholic (See Edit 2)

Sequencer Excerpts:
https://onlinesequencer.net/1613122
http://onlinesequencer.net/1613844 (Alternate: See Edit 1)

• I remember this bit occurring somewhere near the end of the piece - from what I recall, it served as almost the climax, or the buildup to one. The general feel of this portion of the piece was hectic, fast. Now that I remember more, the it seems like the general feel of the entire piece is more melancholic. (See Edit 1)
  • I could be confusing it with other pieces, but I seem to remember that after this sextuplet/triplet run, there were a series of stronger chords that signify the climax of the piece.
• While the set tempo and the actual notes are likely incorrect, I think the excerpt pretty accurately reflects how this portion of the piece went.
  • The tempo in the excerpt is likely inaccurate, so I wouldn't go off of the listed BPM. I tried to emulate the rhythm and general pitch as closely as I could here. From what I can remember, it sounded like either sextuplets or triplets.
  • I'm also not sure what key the piece is in, so it's likely that the sequencer excerpt either isn't in the right key, uses the wrong notes, or both. But it's as close to the song as I think I can get. Although I tried looking on Musipedia to no avail, it might be helpful to consider the sequencer excerpt as more of a melodic contour/parsons code.

Example Pieces:

• Example 1: Elfen Lied OP - Lilium (Piano) (See Edit 2)
• Example 2: The Poet - David Nevue (@ 2:11) (See Edit 3)

Ruled Out

The following pieces have been ruled out. They are in (mostly) alphabetical or

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

At work, I have a workstation.

edit: cheers u/cheer_up_richard

Put it on my bill