It would be shocking if this isn't a repost but I could not resist
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.
SpaceX's rocket was designed to be as wide as it could be and still be transported on the roads.
So when the boss wanted to make it larger, they had to elongate it.
What do you call a pasta that's not too bad but could be better if it was cooked a little longer?
I was asked if I could have any superpower in the world what would it be?
I answered Cold war russia
Found out I could talk to dead people, I thought it be cool but...
There was a locked metal box at an auction. The auctioneer said it was from the 1920’s and owned by really wealthy man. There could’ve been some really valuable stuff in it or it could just be empty. I didn’t want to bid anymore than $100 on it.
I thought it was a safe bet.
My friend saw I was upset the other day and he said "It could be worse. You could be an irrigated hole in the ground surrounded by brick work that people use to get water"
It didn't help, but I knew he meant well
Remember the good old days, before the pandemic? It used to be you could meet new people, maybe even fall in love and get married.
Now I’m just dating myself
Trying to fall asleep a few nights ago, I asked my wife, "If you could have any animal as a pet, what would it be?"
She said, "Cats. They check all my boxes." We let that sink in before we both started laughing.
If I could be in any fraternity it’d be
Darlings you got to let me know. Should I shave or should I grow? If I shave there could be stubble, and if I grow it could be double. So c’mon and let me know ohhhh..
My friend keeps his rare coin collection where it could easily be stolen.
I mean, he has no common cents.
My dad said the other day, when I was feeling low, 'don't worry it could be worse, you could be in a hole full of water'
Wouldn't it be cool if you could project cat sounds into other people's heads?
If you could learn how to say one phrase in every language what would it be?
“I’m sorry, I didn’t vote for him”
I tried to think of the cheesiest way to make a goulda cheese pun, but it could always be cheddar 🧀
Whenever I encountered one of life's little traumas, my Dad would take me to one side and say "it could be worse - you could be submerged in water twenty foot down a dark shaft"
Bless him - He meant well
I met Buzz Aldrin once and asked how he felt being the second man on the moon. "Well..." he said. "It could have been anyone. Right up until we landed, we hadn't decided who would be first out the door. Then, once we touched down, Neil suggested we flip for it."
"And he won?" I asked.
"Well, no..." he mumbled. "The coin was still in the air when Neil jumped down the ladder, the big jerk!"
If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
If you could eliminate a race within the year, which would it be, and why?
From my perspective, and it's not going to be a popular one, but it would have to be the Monaco Grand Prix
Doctor: I can’t find out what your problem is. It could be due to excess alcohol consumption.
Me: It’s okay. I can come back when you are sober.
I needed some really strong tape, and I found some. I was disappointed when I found it could be torn.
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying “Cheer up man, it could be worse. You could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
My friend keeps saying, “Cheer up, it could be worse, you could get stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
My friend keeps telling me to cheer up these days. He says it could be a lot worse
I could be trapped inside an underground hole filled with water.
I know he means well.
One of my friends keeps telling me “It could be worse, you could be quarantined underground, in a hole full of water.”
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
My friend keeps saying “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water”
I know he means well.
(Since my last well-joke did well (pun intended) I thought this would be a nice follow-up)
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
My best friend keeps telling me to “cheer up man. It could be a lot worse, you could be stuck in an underground hole filled with water”
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man, it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"
My friend keeps saying cheer up it could be worse you could be in a hole in the ground full of water
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
Doctor: I can’t seem to find what is wrong with you. But it could be the excess alcohol consumption.
Man: No worries. I’ll come back when you are sober.
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