A list of puns related to "Chough Pyung ok"
To which they answered βyesβ βouiβ βsiβ βjaβ.
She hugged me
The Corvid.
Probable caws.
.. " I dunno, that's what they're fighting about "
He said "Knock yourself out!"
Early days with the kids. five, six? I don't really remember, but it was about the time they were afraid of "Monsters" in the closet, under the bed, always at night. Frustrating!
Anyway, I used to put water in a spray bottle, add just a little of my aftershave (so it smelled like me), and I created a label for "Monster Spray". The label looked damn good, it looked "real" at least to a six year old.
Spray under the bed, around the room, in the closet, wherever. It worked so well that every kid in the neighborhood was borrowing it!
Years later, a young niece was afraid of "Bee's" in her dreams, I guess she had been stung, so I turned my brother on to the secret. We made "Monster and Bee Spray" for her.
To this day, I think the secret was the little bit of aftershave, and that we took it seriously.
That's such a trash opinion. (Sorry the joke sucks)
Satisfactory
I butted in and said donβt do that itβll hurt.
I know where to draw the line...
Iβve got nothing to hide
They are all bark and no bite.
Because it's fast food.
I replied I had never thought about it before, but I suppose Iβll take the right side.
Cashier: βsir, I meant mashed potatoes, corn, or beans.β
OK, when my first kid became cognizant, about two years old, I would wait until I could see the street light was going to turn green, just blow at it, and it would turn green. I never said a word. I would just do it.
After doing this for about a year or so, my daughter caught on and could not figure out how I was doing this.
She finally asked me, "Daddy Magic", of course.
She is now 31, and she still blows at street lights.
That is the real Daddy Magic.
"Is Pepsi okay?"
....but don't get into the habit.
Son: I can spell Yacht!
Dad: Ok, spell Yacht
Son: Y-A-H-T
Dad: You forgot the C
Son: No, itβs under the Yacht
He's a got a faux pas now
My sister was scratching her son's back at bedtime while they talked. She told him it was time for bed.
Him: "Please don't go yet."
Her: "OK, but you have to lie quietly."
Him: (Whispering) "I'm 21 years old."
But at the door there was a sign saying no chocolate allowed. M&M hesitates.
"Hey guys, I might skip this one. I'm a chocolate. I'll catch you guys later" Skittle and Jelly Bean protest. "Nah man, you'll be fine, you're candy on the outside. Come in with us, it'll be fun!" Says his cousin Skittle. "Yeah, if anyone has a problem with you, we'll look after you" says Jelly Bean.
M&M decides he will go in, encouraged by his friends. They all have a good time, and no one mentions anything about M&M being chocolate on the inside.
The night is going well then suddenly the front door bangs open and in walks Vick and his gang of vapour drops. The party goes quiet as Vick surveys the room. His eyes stop on M&M.
"What the fuck are you doing M&M? Can't fucking read the sign? No chocolate allowed."
"But I'm candy on the outside, it's OK, right guys?" Protests M&M weakly. Jelly Bean and Skittle back off into the shadows, leaving M&M by himself.
" I think we need to teach this smart ass chocolate a fucking lesson, let's take this outside." Says Vick.
The vapor drops grab M&M and drag him outside and start beating him up, cracking his shell through to his chocolate. The gang walk away leaving M&M barely conscious on the lawn.
The next day in hospital, Jelly Bean and Skittle come to visit their friend, feeling bad for him. "Why didn't you guys stick up for me?" Asks M&M. "Man, you know Vick, there was nothing we could do, he's fucking menthol."
"a watched pot never boils"
Ok so, I've been looking high and low for a list of punny- wordplay like nicknames. All I can find are
Jakey-Snakey
Andrew-my-mandrew
or names that just have '-enator' added to them?
If anyone has some fun nicknames please share!
I turned myself around
Gastroenterologists have heard every colon/rectum/bile/poop-related joke ad naseum, but I managed to sling a couple of original zingers while being prepped for my colonoscopy.
#1
Me to anesthesiologist: How long have you worked at this clinic?
Anest: About a year. Been with field medical teams my entire career. This is the first time settled down in a clinic...and first time in gastro.
Me: I see. After years in the field, how do like working in an orifice?
Anest.: LOL, no idea how I haven't heard that one yet.
#2
Doctor: We're administering the sedative now. You'll wake up in the recovery bay where I'll brief you.
Me: OK, I'll see you on the outside...[getting groggy]...after you see me on the inside...
Doctor: OK, I'm stealing that one....
My stay-at-home wife came in earlier and asked what I wanted for dinner. "I don't know... You pick, you're cooking it after all."
A few minutes later she comes in with a frying pan. "Here ya go!"
It was a piece of paper. With the words "I don't know" written on both sides.
... Smartass, lol.
They are cutting edge technology.
I havenβt been able to tell a single dad joke all year
The teacher said it had to be specific
An American, a Frenchman, a Mexican, and a German were all attending a Zoom meeting. The supervisor asked, βCan you all see me OK?β To which they answered, βYesβ βOuiβ βSiβ βJa.β
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