Its because they are ICE-O-LATED
Because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
True story, I work in the health industry, get to ask these questions from time to time:
Me: Good morning (of course no matter what time of day it is)! I have 4 questions for you, let’s see if you studied for the test...
Patient: (most of the time, chuckle)
Me: Have you had a fever in the last 48 hours?
Patient: No
Me: Have you had a persistent cough recently?
Patient: No
Me: Have you been tested for COVID-19 recently?
Patient (sometimes): Yes
Me: Do you know the results of the test?
Patient (about 85% of the time): Negative
Me: You don’t know the results of the test? (Straight face behind mask)
Patient: It was negative
Me: (smile and chuckle showing through mask)
Patient: Ohhhh! I get it! (Laughs 95% of the time)
Me: Dad jokes have to happen... 🙂
/insert question #4 here, unrelated to said joke... heh
True story. Happen about 2 hrs ago.
Back trying. My wife and I both work in the medical field. She runs hospital employee health dept, and I’m the dental director for a public health agency.
My wife had Covid-19 in January. We were talking about the long term, later effects of Covid on people’s health.
Wife: I wonder what the residual effects of Covid-19 are. My left ear hasn’t been right since I had Covid.
Me: Well of course not.
Wife: Why? What have you heard?
Me: Well your left ear can’t feel right. It’s your left ear.
Wife: God, why did I marry you 33 years ago?
My dad just sent me this (couldn't help but groan, even as a dad myself):
I had a fella in painting and decorating the house for the last three days, I got chatting to him and it turns out he is actually a Ryanair pilot on PUP (Pandemic Unemployment Payment - social welfare in Ireland for those affected by Covid), he is decorating now to try and pay his mortgage, sad times but in fairness he did a great job on the landing😬👍
Because they're too ice-o-lated
While searching for a cure to Covid-19 scientists discovered that diarrhea is hereditary. They found that it runs in your jeans.
Symptoms include severe triceracoughs.
Because they’re all ice-olated.
also in the news:
Patients who have died or been admitted to intensive care with Covid-19 have been found to be deficient in a vitamin found in spinach, eggs, and hard and blue cheeses, raising hopes that dietary change might be one part of the answer to combating the disease.
Little did those countries know, the US had a Trump card.
As they are expecting to release Covid-20 Pro in September.
Because they're already in ICEolation.
To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.
None. Because they’re Ice-o-lated.
and people are lined up for blocks.
It was a weird celery
- If Covid-19 doesn't take you out, can I?
- Is that hand sanitizer in your pocket are you happy to be within 6 ft of me?
- Can't spell virus without U and I.
- Do you need toilet paper cuz I can be your Prince Charmin.
- I saw you checking me out from across the bar, stay there.
- Hey Baby! Can I ship you a drink?
- Can't spell quarantine without U R A Q T.
credit: some facebook post i saw.
I'm just kidding. Don't pick up COVID-19 in line. It's dangerous, stay home people.
I heard the atmosphere in their stadiums is contagious.
A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"
I guess you could say the nations of the world were in a Cold War.
It's going tits up.
It's because they're ice-o-lated.
Because they are ice-o-lated
It’s because they are ice-o-lated.
It’s because they are ice-o-lated.
It's because they're ice-o-lated
Because they are ice-o-lated
Because they're ice-o-lated
Because they’re ice-o-lated.
Because they are ice-o-lated
Because they're ISO-O-LATED
Cause they're in ICE-olation ;)
Because they are in ice-olation.
Because they're ice-o-lated
It's because they're ice-o-lated
It's because they're ice-o-lated.
It's because they are ice-o-lated.
