How do you get to the other side of the river with Black Panther?

Wakanda Bridge

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Erythy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2022
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What kind of bread does Black Panther's bakery make?

T'Challah

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AADPS
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2023
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150 Elephant Jokes

This is a compilation from the internet, and a few I made or heard myself. Hope you laugh!

^((Elephant Jokes were a thing from the 1960s. You can read about them on Wikipedia.))

^((Each section should be read all at once, in order. Some sections also reference previous sections. ))

Mouse

Q: Why did the elephant run from the mouse?

A: Because it had a bazooka.

Q: Why did the mouse chase the elephant?

A: To steal the bazooka.

Toenails

Q: Why did the elephant paint its toenails red?

A: So it could hide in a cherry tree.

Q: Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?

A: Works, doesn't it?

Q: How can you tell if an elephant is hiding in a cherry tree?

A: Tickle the cherries and see if they laugh.

Q: What's the loudest sound in the jungle?

A: A giraffe eating cherries.

Q: How can you tell if there have been elephants in your fridge?

A: There are footprints in the custard.

Q: Why do elephants paint their toenails yellow?

A: That's not paint, it's custard.

Q: Why do elephants paint their toenails red, blue, green, orange, yellow, and brown?

A: So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.

Q: How did the mouse break his back?

A: He tried to carry a bag of M&Ms home from the store.

Oak Trees

Q: How do you get an elephant on top of an oak tree?

A: Stand him on an acorn and wait fifty years.

Q: What if you don't want to wait fifty years?

A: Parachute him from an airplane.

Q: Why isn't it safe to climb oak trees between 1 and 2 in the afternoon?

A: Because that is when the elephants practice their parachute jumping.

Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the oak tree?

A: Because it was dead.

Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the oak tree?

A: It was glued to the first one.

Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the oak tree?

A: It thought it was a game.

Q: And why did the oak tree fall down?

A: It thought it was an elephant.

Q: Why is it dangerous to walk in the forest between 3 and 4 in the afternoon?

A: That's when the elephants fall out of the oak trees.

Q: What is a furry alligator?

A: A bear that crossed the woods at 3:30 in the afternoon.

Under the Bed

Q: How can you tell if there’s an elephant under your bed?

A: Your nose is touching the ceiling.

Q: How can you tell if there's an elephant in your bed?

A: He has a big 'E' on hi

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2023
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What do you call a

Woman with one leg - Eileen

Man in a bush - Russell

Man with a seagull on his head - Cliff

Man with a plank of wood on his head - Edward

Man with 3 planks of wood on his head - Edward Woodward

Man with no shins - Tony

Woman with a tennis racket on her head - Annette

Woman who throws away her bills - Bernadette.

Man that comes through the letterbox - Bill.

Woman with her legs on either side of the river - Bridgette.

Man with a large blue, black, and yellow mark on his head - Bruce.

Man with cat scratches on his head - Claude.

Man with a spade on his head - Doug.

Man without a spade on his head - Douglas

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tinger99
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2022
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My Vietnamese driver told me several riddles yesterday, do you know what they were?

First off a six-parter

  1. If there are 500 rocks on a plane and you throw one out, how many are left? A: 499
  2. How do you get an elephant into a fridge? This is a three part process A: open the door, put in the elephant, close the door.
  3. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? This is a four part process A: open the door, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, close the door.
  4. All the animals go to heaven for a meeting, but one can't come, why not? A: the giraffe, it's in the fridge.
  5. A weak old lady has to cross a river full of alligators, how does she get across? A: the alligators are at the meeting in heaven.
  6. As soon as the old lady gets across the river she dies, how? A: the rock fell on her head.

No 2 A real cool guy walks into a cafe. He wearing sunglasses, tidy haircut, but just a super cool guy all round. He orders a glass of condensed milk and puts it on his table. Next time the waitress walks past he asks for a glass of black coffee. Now he has a glass of milk and a glass of coffee next to each other, this guy is real cool. Next time the waitress walks past he orders a glass of ice. She's happy to do that for this dude because he is so cool. He mixes the milk and coffee with the ice and stirs with his little spoon. Looks good. The old man that owns the cafe walks up to him and says, 'I see your in the Navy". How did he know?

A: he was wearing a naval uniform.

Anyone know similar nonsense?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Patyboomba
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
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