Ante's law Puns

What if the two most famous sound changes in English's history happened again, affecting modern RP English?

First, the Great Vowel Shift 2.0:

In real life, the starting vowels were /i:, e:, ɛ:, a:, u:, o:, ɔː/. RP doesn't have these exactly, but it can be pretty closely approximated by the vowels /i:, ɪ:, ɛ:, ɑ:, ʉ:, o:*, ɔ:/.

*where [o:] is the pre-/l/ high allophone of /ɔː/, as in "all". The neo-GVS is thus:

• iː → aɪ
• ʉː → aʊ
• ɪː → iː
• ɛː → iː
• oː → uː
• ɔː → əʊ
• ɑː → eɪ

To this I'll add "aʊ → aː" (happening before the above changes), so as to provide a new long /a/ vowel, similar to how a new one historically emerged from words like "PALM".

Next, Grimm's Law 2.0:

Grimm's Law saw changes to labial stops, alveolar stops, velar stops, and labiovelar stops. Modern English doesn't have labiovelar stops, but we can create them quite easily:

• gr, gw → gʷ
• kr, kw → kʷ

This change is reasonable as /r/ is already labialised in English, and it neatly affects the word "Grimm".

So English's voiceless stops /p t k kʷ/ become fricatives /f θ x xʷ/, it's voiced stops /b d g gʷ/ become voiceless /p t k kʷ/, but where do the new voiced stops come from? In Grimm's Law v.1, it was from aspirated voiced stops. These don't exist in English, so a reasonable alternative might be from fortition of voiced fricatives/approximants - specifically /v ð j w/. This makes the new Grimm's Law:

• v → b → p → f
• ð → d → t → θ
• j → g → k → x
• w → gʷ → kʷ → xʷ

So "quick brown fox" becomes [xʷɪx pra:n fɔxs] and "one two three" becomes [gʷʌn θaʊ θraɪ].

Dua Hook -> Ant Hook -> Verse -> Repeat

Would be super grateful, want those *pure* Yandhi vibes without any JIK

In particular, what competencies are needed to maintain a civilization?

It's been a while since I have found a new song that I consider to be a favorite, but diving deep into Kanye West's full discography (including features and many, many leaks) I found one.

The song Law of Attraction was leaked in 2019 but was recorded some time in 2018 most likely and features Ant Clemons. With a lot of Kanye albums, he tends to find one person that he collaborates with a lot more on that album when compared to other artists. For Late Registration, it was Jon Brion. For 808s and Heartbreak, it was Kid Cudi. For Yandhi, his planned follow-up to his 2018 album Ye, which has never been released (referring to Yandhi), that person was Ant Clemons.

Ant Clemons was featured on Law of Attraction, performing the song's hook, whereas Kanye mumbles verses in order to find a flow. Had this song been completely finished, he most likely would have understandable verses. This song was later reworked into Use This Gospel, featuring Clipse and Kenny G, from his 2019 album Jesus is King. However, Ant Clemons' hook, and the sexy ass guitar at the end of Law of Attraction are not used in the Jesus is King version.

Link