Adult Life Skills Puns

Growing up, my Nparents never taught me ANYTHING, they never helped with homework or schoolwork (they didn't even know what classes i was doing) they never taught me how to use electronics or kitchen appliances (I taught myself how to cook fairly young as I didn't like my Nmum's cooking as it was literal nursery food, and some days she just wouldn't want to cook for us) and they never taught me any life lessons or just how to cope with adult life and life problems. My only life lesson was "Life just gets worse" by my Nmum (wow great advice). I've grown up clueless and feeling helpless, not knowing how to do a lot of adult tasks and it upsets me. I feel so pathetic as even my own boyfriend had to teach me how to use a washing machine or dish washer (been a few years now) at age 16. I was and still am my own parent (as i of course taught myself mostly everything) but being your own parent doesn't get you far when you get to bills, housing, and just being a proper adult. I still can't even drive, and I probably won't be able to for a few more years (I was going to hopefully start to learn this summer, but sadly we all know what happened to the world)

At the age of 20, I currently have to try and deal with renting a property out for my second year of university, which involves agreements, deposists, a garantour etcetc and i'm so confused and frustrated, yet I can not ask for any help by my Nparents as they either A: won't care B: Won't understand it themselves or C: Stress me out trying to make me understand it. I have difficulty understand certain topics due to not being taught how to deal with them as a younger person, and yes I know it's my own fault for not properly teaching myself, but it's hard to teach yourself as a young person when you haven't dealt with it before. When i use to ask questions as a young child, they would snap at me and get angry, so I stopped asking questions and I sadly started to act from those childish moments, when I run into something I don't understand, I start to panic and overthink the situation, as I don't know how to deal with anything.

Some younger people don't realise how fortunate they are to have loving helpful families and parents, especially for situations like this. I would say i'm envious. My other roommates have had no hassle dealing with this due to their help from their patient and caring family members, when it feels like i've hit a wall. I feel so stupid and pathetic asking for their help too, as I

Cheating is a legitimate way to advance yourself through life, albeit immoral. There are virtually no people in the world who have not cheated or lied in a professional or personal setting, and these skills could also be learned and honed. If caught, consequences should be doled out, but it should be recognized as a legitimate way to get by in life.

Edit: I actually don't agree with this idea, but it was an idea I thought I would field. I'm actually a high school teacher and do not condone teaching. But after some good conversation with u/Poobut13 (phenomenal username), I can see how this can be a vicious cycle of immorality that can cause everyone to become more immoral, making the system as a whole much worse.

It is so sad and outrageous to see this mentality of Indians in 2020! -

Youtube: Know why Delhi is called the Rape Capital

This is a result of illiteracy & carrying forward old backwards "culture". Clearly, these men need to be coached about the correct mentality to have, eg:

- A woman wearing a "sexy"-looking outfit does not mean an invitation for sex
- As a man, you can obviously avoid sexually assaulting her.
- There is a thing called consent.

When the Syrian refugees were taken in by western countries, they were required to attend cultural conditioning classes to teach them how to better treat women, and in general prevent rapes by them. Frankly, Indians need such training. They need an attitude adjustment. They need to be taught basic things like women wearing short skirts aren't ready to have sex with you. They need to be taught the modern ways of life. Without teaching them, from their point of view, they are doing nothing wrong.

Youtube: Norway: Rape prevention classes for refugees - BBC News

Why don't we make such a training mandatory for every every adult who turns, say 21, sponsored by the government? How can we make this happen?

To avoid making it controversial by making the classes exclusive about rape-prevention, it could be bundled with other topics like managing personal finance, awareness of current technologies etc and call the whole package as "Mandatory Life Skills"

My kids have school closed for the next 4 weeks. They have homework packets etc.but I'm looking for things to teach them that arent taught in schools.

What sort of things did you wish you had been taught prior to becoming an adult/moving out on your own.

I have three kids 14m, 13f, 11m who are off school. They've been taught the basics of baking and cooking (they can make simple meals on their own and we'll be working on meal planning together) and are okayish at cleaning and they do their own laundry.

My daughter has learned how to sew, previously from her own interest and the boys will be taught this week.

We will be self isolating at the lake so the plan is to have them each pick a project to build for the cabin using power tools and measuring etc (bookshelf, table, box etc)

What other things did you wish you had learned growing up but didnt and had to figure out as a adult or call for help with?

I don't really know how to describe these sort of movies, but I like the plotlines. Kind of like a coming of age story, but with adults figuring themselves out later, I guess. I loved both protagonist, and the plots, and everything about Unicorn Store and Adult Life Skills, and I would really like to watch more movies like this, but I don't know what to search for exactly to find movies with the same vibes. I just happened across both of them and they seem to be a rare sort of movie, to me at least.

My FIL is driving me (and my kid) nuts. He keeps doing shit that he knows will get a rise out of her. Now, she's 3 so obviously just about anything can trigger an explosive temper (like when her favorite blue spoon is dirty so we have to use the green one today) right? Except he does stuff on purpose. (Example: Getting her a green spoon when she asked for a blue one that is obviously right there). And he JUST ALWAYS DOES little things like this! I'm so tired of the screaming on a good day and now we get this at grandparents house?

I've told her if grandpa upsets her she can walk away and not play with him. I've told grandpa to quit riling her up but he says he "needs" to do this because she doesn't have any siblings to teach her she can't always get what she wants.

I'm so frustrated with this attitude. He's from a family of 9 and he has 8 kids for background. Us having just one has really rocked the boat for my husband's family. It's so ridiculous to me that she is being unfairly targeted to "not get her way" because she's an only.

I am very good about giving her experiences to learn conflict resolution with other kids and I put her in a preschool that does amazing work teaching kids these skills and it's so frustrating seeing adults act like children to be mean on purpose to "teach a lesson".

Mostly, I just feel sorry for grandpa because he's losing a relationship with his granddaughter by being an ass to her. And he's going to just decide she's being "rude" and avoiding him because she's an only child and not because of his own mean behavior driving her away.

I'm an ESL teacher that is putting together a life skills program for students who will be directly entering the workforce after graduation. I want to put together a course on life skills that would be pertinent to find jobs, manage basic needs, and start them off in a positive way. I'd love to hear from other teachers!

There are some situations in adult life where being the bitchy "queen bee" or the handsome bully will take you far - but they are rare and these are likely situations you don't want to be in in the first place.

And being sociable and networking are the opposite skills of what makes you popular in high school. They don't have social skills, they have popularity skills. Being in a popular group involves excluding others and controlling your power over them.

Sociability and networking involve being open and available to all people and bridging the gap between groups, the opposite of popularity skills. Popular people are often not really that likable, they are just good at hoarding the kind of power you get as a student because, as a kid/adolescent, what your peers surrounding you think of you is one of the most important things to you. This is not the case among successful and confident adults - at least not the same way.

growing up my parents were adamantly against my expressing interest in anything they weren't interested in themselves and yelled at me to shut up every time I expressed a negative emotion, they completely neglected to teach me any life skills and made it so that I didn't feel comfortable expressing a desire to learn (at 26 I still don't even know how to tie my shoes). Now as an adult, my mom has been hinting that she's disappointed that I never learned how to cook or drive (despite my currently studying to get my learners), she keeps asking me what I'd do if I ever moved out because I wouldn't be able to fend for myself, uh, sorry? who was it that was too busy with work and didn't want to deal with any self-expression over my entire childhood?

I’ve been thinking a lot about my late childhood with my mother. Her favorite thing was to croon that she was the “alpha b-tch” of the house, strutting around that only she got to yell and scream and tantrum and hit and throw things. I wasn’t allowed to because I was a 16yo ‘girl’ and my job was to cater to her, be her spouse and raise my sister with her. Obviously, this caused a lot of problems, because as I got older I got tired of her shit, and because I wasn’t treated like a ‘daughter’ and more like a spouse I would talk back or otherwise fight her when she pissed me off enough.

To survive you had to fly under the radar. And to fly under the radar, you “gray rock”. But i grey rocked.. pretty much fulltime. At first it was just with her when I was in her presence. Then it became when I was in that house. And then after that.. I think it became a part of my personality and has just gotten worse as time has gone on. When I escaped and went to college 2000 miles away, strong feelings would burst out at inappropriate times and I’d have panic attacks that would take days to recover from. Slowly, I improved in more obvious ways. I lived on my own. Had a job, friends, a relationship.

But here now at 25 living as a NB person, I have noticed that I never.. stopped disassociating. I was a quiet child naturally, sure, but now I don’t react unless it’s late at night or if it’s an extreme stimulus, and even then my body restrains the extreme reaction as I’m having it. The end result is looking absolutely manic, panic breathing while my eyes are fucking glasses over or laughing even when I’m crazy angry. When I get mad, my blood pressure spikes so bad it hurts, but other than swearing more I don’t have any other reaction. I underreact to so many parts of my life, and when something bad happens I just.. mentally box it away. I think I’ve completely severed the ability to feel things in the moment and act appropriately.

To feel things and do things, it has to be manufactured. If I feel like my body is sad, I usually don’t know why, but after noticing it long enough I’ll like, put on sad songs and sad movies and think of my cats passing and THEN my body will cry. With intimate relations, my husband has to be forceful (with consent, obviously) enough that THEN I’ll be in the moment both mind and body to participate. It’s like that for everything joyous and sad and everything in between. I THOUGHT that I was just great at dealing with everything, but i realised

What would you say is the number struggle you feel when it comes to being an adult with poor social skills? What do you hate about it the most?

Curious to hear your thoughts.

I never learned how mortgages, taxes, car loans, school loans, budgeting, proper grocery shopping lists, interest rates, credit scores, how to rent an apartment, etc etc. Is there someplace I can learn these basic skills and knowledge? Preferably easily explained and not overly complicated lol

My parents never explained a lot of anything that was “adult” related while growing up, so I don’t know anything now. I filed taxes for the first time this year (I’m 26) and had no idea how to even answer the questions they asked online at turbo tax.

Can someone please explain any of the basic skills you think an adult needs by the time they’re my age?

Still living at home cause I can’t afford to move out cause nobody in their right mind will hire me. I have depression but that’s not really an excuse anymore. I’m studying biology so at least I’m doing something I guess. Anyway, my parents never really bothered to teach me basic life skills and I’m really embarrassed about it. I can’t cook, I can’t clean, nothing. I can’t even drive. I absolutely hate living here but I’m trapped. And even if I do manage to leave, I won’t last 5 minutes because I’m an idiot. What do I do? Why am I so defective?

The ineptly named flylady system is perfect for staying on track with ADHD although it is for anyone. The aim is to organize your home and life by breaking down every aspect of home management into daily and weekly tasks that are worked in 15 minute increments. Each week has an emphasis on a specific area and is outlined in the system. If I consistently stick to my plan, the house stays clean, bills paid, and no laundry mountains with 1 hours work a day. (Note kid and pets in this house) Theres a particular emphasis on self compassion that makes the act of cleaning enjoyable aside from having a clean house, something I never thought possible. Anyway it's been a sustainable routine since September and I wanted to share. There are tons of mentors on youtube if anyone is interested. My personal favorite happens to be a lady named Kat who is a kind grandmotherly figure. I'm not sure if it's ok to share a link to her beginner video but I'm sure you could find it easily.

Edit to say I'm not affiliated in any way with the Flylady just sharing what helps me.

I have a young friend who had very little support growing up and is not facing significant difficulties with how to adult.

I'm trying to teach him some basics like how to budget, savings, eating other things than noodles every day, etc. I'm not really the best at all this either though.

Is there any kind of support for these kinds of people that I could help him apply for?

I've searched on Google but I haven't managed to identify anything concrete.

Whenever I see someone ask the question, "Why isn't school teaching me things that I can use in everyday life instead of things I'll learn once and never use again?" it always gets shut down with people saying that school is for teaching kids how to learn things, and/or that it's the responsibility of the parents to teach them those things. I cannot for the life of me understand this line of thinking.

First of all, what about kids with neglectful or abusive parents? I know many people whose parents didn't bother teaching them the skills they need to be successful in modern society, and they had to either find out for themselves or learn the hard way. Most of these people went to high school, so why weren't they taught useful life skills at any point? Why were they instead taught that "mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell"? Only a fraction of the kids who were taught that will ever put it to use again, whereas teaching everyone how to be productive members of society would be so much more beneficial for everyone.

Second, school isn't just about "learning how to learn". That's ridiculous. I'm not saying that teaching kids new ways of learning information is bad, it's very important. But why do these have to be mutually exclusive? Just because you teach kids how to balance a checkbook doesn't mean you can't also teach them more advanced math concepts like trigonometry or calculus. But that shouldn't be the priority. It makes no sense to make that the priority.

I graduated high school, and was honestly shocked at how little it prepared me for real life. I'm lucky to have parents who mostly know what they're doing to teach me these things, but many people aren't so lucky, and that's a real travesty in my opinion.

I know how to drive and cook. What other important life skills should I know as an adult.