Loan me 50 dollars

One of the classic Ā Abbott and Costello Ā routines, where Bud Abbott takes advantage of a common math mistake that we all make to fleece his pal, Lou Costello, out of all of his money. Ā The skit ends with a simple ā€˜read my mindā€™ routine that takes Louā€™s last remaining bill. Ā This routine was done Ā many Ā times, both in the movies and their radio show.

Bud Abbott: Do me a favor, loan me $50.
Lou Costello: Bud, I canā€™t. I canā€™t loan you $50.
Bud Abbott: Oh, yes, ya can.
Lou Costello: No, I canā€™t. All I got is $40.
Bud Abbott: All right, give me the $40 and youā€™ll owe me 10 Ā 
Lou Costello: Ok, Iā€™ll owe you 10.
Bud Abbott: Thatā€™s right.
Lou Costello: How come I owe you 10?
Bud Abbott: How much did I ask for?
Lou Costello: 50
Bud Abbott: How much did you give me?
Lou Costello: 40.
Bud Abbott: So you owe me $10.
Lou Costello: Thatā€™s right. Ā [Pause] But you owe me 40.
Bud Abbott: Donā€™t change the subject.
Lou Costello: Iā€™m not changing the subject; youā€™re trying to change my finances. Come on, Abbott give me my $40.
Bud Abbott: All right, thereā€™s your $40, now give me the 10 you owe me.
Lou Costello: Iā€™m paying you on account.
Bud Abbott: On account?
Lou Costello: On account I donā€™t know how I owe it to ya.
Bud Abbott: Thatā€™s the way you feel about it, thatā€™s the last time I ask you for a loan of $50.
Lou Costello: But how can I loan ya $50, now. All I got is 30.
Bud Abbott: Well, give me the 30 and youā€™ll owe me 20.
Lou Costello: Ok. This is getting worse all the time. (Look at audience) First I owe him 10, now I owe him 20.
Bud Abbott: Well, why do you run yourself into debt?
Lou Costello: Iā€™m not running in, youā€™re pushing me!1
Bud Abbott: I canā€™t help it if you canā€™t handle your finances. I do all right with my money.
Lou Costello: And you do all right with my money too.
Bud Abbott: Now I asked you for a loan of $50. You gave me 30, so you owe me 20. 20 and 30 is 50.
Lou Costello: No. No. No. 25 and 25 is 50.
Bud Abbott: All right, hereā€™s your $30, now give me the 20 you owe me. Fine guy, wonā€™t loan a pal $50.

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