8 Letters Puns

H to O

I was Clueless

Letter rip

Smiles. The first and last letters are a mile apart.

would you gain or lose marks for not using capital letters...?

Letter B

I've done that, but what do I do with the letter.

“Santa: you’ve been around since the 4th century, seen alphabets and languages rise and fall. Do you have a favorite letter?”

Claus thinks about it, scratches his thick white beard and says: “A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z”

“Well Santa, I just asked for one. What does that mean?”

“And I gave you one! My favorite letter of the alphabet is the most Christmasy one out there! No-L!”

Talking to my 3 year old son the other day:

Me: Do you know your letters?

Son: Yes

Me: Can you say the alphabet?

Son: The alphabet

My wife and I were cracking up.

today i tripped and fell down

and my face hit the letter E on a sewer drain cover

and then the police came and charged me with felony

My Dad has recently shown a fascination with space and NASA. Long story short, Christmas is coming up and my plan is to surprise him with an all expense paid trip to Florida for 4 days with passes to the Kennedy Space Center. I’d schedule it around a launch so he would be able to see it in person. As well as checking out the area a bit since we’re there.

Which is where I need your help! I want to coordinate hints with presents that slightly hint at the trip. For example, I picked out a NASA tshirt, a space shuttle plush toy, assorted astronaut ice cream, socks that have planets and a rocket on them, mug that says “coolest dad in the galaxy,” a map/atlas of florida, and luggage tags. And the final gift I’m thinking will be a letter that puts all the clues together and would include the plane tickets, car rental agreement, hotel confirmation, and the admission tickets in an envelope.

Can anyone give me ideas on what hints to use??

• I’m still adding/taking away present ideas so if anyone has any better ideas please let me know!!

Thank you so much!! Any type of help is appreciated!! I don’t really have that “creative” part of the mind... whether it be a rhyme or dad joke-y type hint, it doesn’t matter!

I replied, “No way that is in the top 5 most voweluable letters!”

They're a letter apart.

We're sitting around having dinner, and my wife isn't feeling great about the cooking. My daughter (6) starts critiquing the sauce, talking about what she doesn't like. I told her that sometime you have to read the room and see whether people want their cooking criticized.

She looks at me and says "Dad, you can't read a room if there are no letters in it" and starts giggling.

The letter ‘b’.

The rest of the letters comes 'aughter' it.

She said I missed out the letters, U R A Q T, I responded with “thanks!”

Password must contain a letter: '123456𝒟𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝒮𝑜𝓃, 𝐼𝓉 𝒽𝒶𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓃 𝓂𝒶𝓃𝓎 𝓎𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓈 𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓈𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑒 𝐼'𝓋𝑒 𝒻𝑒𝓁𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒿𝑜𝓎 𝑜𝒻 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒶 𝓈𝒾𝓂𝓅𝓁𝑒 𝑔𝒶𝓂𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝒸𝒶𝓉𝒸𝒽 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓎𝑜𝓊. 𝐻𝑜𝓌 𝐼 𝓁𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓈𝑒 𝓈𝒾𝓂𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓇 𝓉𝒾𝓂𝑒𝓈, 𝓌𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓃𝓃𝑜𝒸𝑒𝓃𝓉! 𝒴𝑒𝓉 𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒹𝒾𝒻𝒻𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓌𝒶𝓎𝓈 𝒾𝓃 𝓌𝒽𝒾𝒸𝒽 𝓌𝑒 𝒸𝒶𝓃 𝑒𝓃𝒿𝑜𝓎 𝑒𝒶𝒸𝒽 𝑜𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇𝓈 𝒸𝑜𝓂𝓅𝒶𝓃𝓎, 𝒶 𝒸𝑜𝓁𝒹 𝒷𝓇𝑒𝓌 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓁𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓈𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈 𝑜𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓋𝑒𝓇𝒶𝓃𝒹𝒶, 𝑜𝓇 𝓈𝒾𝓂𝓅𝓁𝓎 𝑒𝓃𝒿𝑜𝓎𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓆𝓊𝒾𝑒𝓉 𝓅𝑒𝒶𝒸𝑒𝒻𝓊𝓁𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝓃𝒶𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒 𝑜𝓃 𝒶 𝒻𝒾𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓉𝓇𝒾𝓅. 𝒫𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓈𝑒 𝓋𝒾𝓈𝒾𝓉 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝒯𝒽𝒶𝓃𝓀𝓈𝑔𝒾𝓋𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝒾𝓉 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓂𝑒𝒶𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝓁𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝑒. 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒, 𝒟𝒶𝒹'

Now they are sending me threatening letters

"What is the second letter of the alphabet?" The teacher asked Ringo. But Ringo wasn't sure.

But because Ringo had found himself in a time of trouble, John came to him and whispered words of wisdom

"Letter B"

I only learned my letters up to quueeuuee

Ends with an E and only has one letter in it?

>!Envelope!<

A chef entered his kitchen one day struggling with holding onto a large pumpkin. He noticed three male sheep standing next to his oven. One of them had a collar on him with the letter “A” written on it. The second had a collar with “B” and the third had “C.” The chef didn’t know what to do with the sheep, and they were standing in front of the only place he could put the pumpkin down. He put the pumpkin on the first sheep’s head and nothing happened. He then put it on the second sheep’s head and again, nothing happened. He then put it on the third sheep’s head, and immediately the sheep started cooking a gourmet meal and swearing at anyone who passed by him.

That’s what happens when you put a gourd on ram C in the kitchen.

He said, "I gotta P" I assumed he meant piss but he pulled out a Piece of paper that had the letter P on it and handed to me Then he said, "Now you gotta P"

I'm still laughing

Edit: he did this and in front of my family and made me laugh my ass off

I told him they were the letters of recommendation.

Count the letters. What has 4, longer has 6.

The element will be represented by the letters AH. This is of course the element of surprise.

One happened to put the letter T into a toy stacking cup I was holding. I tried to give it to him but he didn't want it.

So I turned to my other son and said, "Hmm, guess it's not his cup of T".

Neither 3yo got it so I had to tell someone.

Because the rest of the letters were not-E.

…the other four letters?

The poster reads:

"Must be able to type. Must be able to program. And must be bilingual. We are an equal opportunity employer."

The dog takes the poster in his mouth, and walks in. The manager spots the dog, and decides to humour it, pulling up a chair and a computer with a word processor. "Alright, if you want to work here, you need to first write a letter," and leaves the room.

30 minutes later, he comes back in, and the dog has typed out a completely error-free letter.

"Well, I'll be. This is a smart dog. But can he program?" he asks himself.

20 minutes pass, and the dog has made a perfectly running website for the store.

He looks, shocked, at the dog, and finally speaks. "Look, I know you have the qualifications, but, well... you're a dog."

The dog nudges the words "We are an equal opportunity employer." on the poster, and the manager sighs.

"There's no way you're bilingual."

The dog looks him in the eyes, and says, "Meow."

I wanted to make a sign that said "YOU & ME". So, I ordered some big metal letters.

When they arrived, the box was very damaged. I checked if everything was there, but the iron E was lost on me.

Whilst doing a crossword I said to the wife "Mailmans bag?" She asked "How many letters" "Thousands" I replied.

While traveling to a cookout at my dads house, my wife (W) was working through the alphabet with my son (s)

Letter “I”: W: “ I is for..... iguana” S: “iguana.... iguana go outside.” W: looks at me. I look at him. S: (in his best dad style, cheesy laugh) “ha, ha.”

He had no idea what he said. But gosh we got a kick out of it.

They put a bunch of letters in a hat and a guy pulled them out one by one.

The first is pulled out and the guy says “C eh?” The second is pulled out of the hat and the guy says “N eh?” The last letter is pulled out and the guy says “D eh?”

You mix up two letters and your whole joke is urined.

I say we letter

I got a letter from DHL, they said that I have an outstanding balance. It wasn't much though.

But those letters aren't silent, they're just waiting their turn

One time I took a bunch of them with me to Abu Dhabi and while most of them were fine one behaved very weirdly, splitting and separating like it was in the humid air of the tropics. Very strange. I even wrote a letter about it to a listings magazine, which began:

"What's On, I commend to your attention the curious incident of the POG in the dry clime."

A cesium and desist letter.

That got the John Deere letter?

I call it LETTER RIP

I call it Letter Rip.

I call it "Letter Rip."

DAD: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
SON: Envelope.

Smiles.

The first and last letters are miles apart.

Smiles. The first and last letters are a mile apart.