What does Tom Brady and a sale on corn have in common?
They're both a buck an ear (buccaneer)
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 25 2021
Why did William Shatner's lingerie company fail?
Because Shatner Panties just never caught on!
π︎ 704
π
︎ Oct 13 2021
What's the opposite of william?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 03 2022
A little know fact is that J.S. Bach had a lot of grandchildren and they all loved American football...
Of course, they were all a quarter bach....
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 28 2021
William Shakespeare walks in to a bar...
The barman says, 'Sorry mate, you're bard'.
π︎ 37
π
︎ Oct 17 2021
In honor of former president Donald J. Trump
π︎ 31k
π
︎ Jan 20 2021
I once wrote a joke without using the letters J and E!
π︎ 36
π
︎ Nov 02 2021
My Dad just woke me this morning to ask if I heard about William Shatner
Dad: Did you hear that William Shatner is going to space?
Me: Yeah, Jeff Bezos is sending him up
Dad: He's 90-Years old. The G-Forces alone pose a huge health risk
Me: I guess it's getting easier and easier to put people into space
Dad: If they're not careful, they'll turn him into William Shattered
π︎ 9
π
︎ Oct 05 2021
I see William Shatner has just come back from a trip into spaceβ¦
When asked about his trip William said βIt was out of this worldβ.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 14 2021
William Shatner had to go into space on Blue Origin instead of SpaceX
He's obligated to follow the Amazon Prime Directive
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 12 2021
I have a pencil that used to belong to William Shakespeare. He chewed it a lot.
Now, I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B!
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Dec 10 2020
While making my kid a PB&J.
He brings me an apple, wife says βyouβre getting a sandwich sweetie.β With out skipping a beat. I tell her, βhe wants an appletizerβ as I begin to cut it for him.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 22 2021
Breaking News: Archaeologists believe that they've uncovered a cache of pencils that belonged to William Shakespeare. A spokesperson for the dig said they're so badly chewed on the ends,
we can't tell if they're 2B or not 2B.
π︎ 598
π
︎ Apr 23 2021
William Shatner has discontinued his line of ladies lingerie.
Apparently Shatner panties was a poor choice of name.
π︎ 15k
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
What do Jack the Ripper, Catherine the Great, William the Conqueror, and Ivan the Terrible have in common?
π︎ 36
π
︎ Jun 11 2021
Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams & Bruno Mars met in a bar...
But they didn't planet that way.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Jun 14 2021
What did Robin Williams drink at the Aladdin premiere back in '92?
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jul 23 2021
I thought I saw Michael J. Fox at my local garden center.
Iβm not sure if it was him, though, as he had his back to the fuchsias.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jul 15 2021
What Olympic event did William Shakespeare excel at?
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jul 09 2021
I used to read pirated editions of J.R.R. Tolkien.
π︎ 29
π
︎ Jun 02 2021
Went to a fancy restaurant for dinner, and the waiter kept correcting the way i said the dishes.
After i finished eating, trying not to be outdone, i asked for the william.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Dec 17 2021
Saying Tom Brady is the greatest football player in history isnβt just a hyperbole...
π︎ 12
π
︎ Feb 07 2021
Watching the Superbowl and they mentioned Brady has a good arm.
Bet he could really throw a Tom ato
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 08 2021
Why was William fired as an bartender?
Because William Shakesbeer
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jun 27 2021
Worked for Williams Well Drilling for 22 years, but.....
I finally quit that hole-boring business.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jul 08 2021
Who is William DeFoeβs arch enemy?
π︎ 23
π
︎ Mar 31 2021
Little known fact: William Tell and his wife were really good bowlers.
Nobody knows for whom the Tells bowled.
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 14 2021
J.Coleβs son
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 07 2021
It has recently been discovered that William Tell and his son belonged to a bowling league. But Swiss historians have not been able to determine the name of the league's sponsors.
We may never know for whom the Tells bowled.
π︎ 443
π
︎ Oct 19 2020
Dr William Archibald Spooner, the creator of spoonerisms was well known to be a smart fella.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 03 2021
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?
Because they're all not 'C's.
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Dec 11 2019
William Shatner, Star Trekβs Captain Kirk, is said to be extremely disappointed after the collapse of his recently launched womenβs underwear business...
Apparently, nobody was interested in buying βShatner Pantiesβ.
π︎ 40
π
︎ Feb 16 2021
I was very disappointed to find that the movie βDunkirkβ was a World War II movieβ¦
And not the biography of William Shatner
π︎ 25
π
︎ Nov 20 2021
Without a doubt, my favourite Robin Williams movie is Mrs Fire.
Edit: Thanks for my first ever Gold! I have no idea what it does but it sure is shiny =]
π︎ 14k
π
︎ Apr 19 2019
I dropped my PB&J sandwich on the street the other day.
π︎ 24
π
︎ May 01 2021
Did you hear that Vanessa Williams got robbed the other day?
They need to stop Robin Williams
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 21 2021
Police chief: "Why did you arrest Steve Carell, Rainn Wilson, John Krasinski, Jenna Fischer, B. J. Novak, and Ed Helms?"
Deputy: "They were impersonating an office, sir."
π︎ 10
π
︎ Mar 13 2021
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars and Venus Williams all walk into the same bar.
π︎ 56
π
︎ Apr 08 2021
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars, and Venus Williams all walk into the same bar.
But they didnβt planet.
π︎ 578
π
︎ Sep 24 2020
Did you know William Tell and his wife were bowlers?
Noone knows for whom the Tell's bowled.
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 05 2021
I thought I saw Michael J Fox at my local garden centre.
I'm not sure if it was him, though, as he had his back to the fuchsias
π︎ 89
π
︎ Dec 24 2020
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars and Venus Williams walk into a bar
π︎ 63
π
︎ Oct 29 2020
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.