A list of puns related to "Wild Night"
Grapes suck man, I mean potatoes they're appealing ;) and can even grow back even after being smashed ;) out drunk, but grapes they just get drunk and wine and wine and wine ;), oh and corn, god who needs corn, they just party but pop off ;) for no reason, they say after its waters temper ;) but... well I guess water is not good either, they get angry and just boil ;) over... oh and I heard some news about tomatoes they had an affair with cherries ;), I heard that tomatoes wife is gonna get revenge by dewing grass ;), but I can only say one thing the plant party was wild last night.
Okay so the animals have been on the ark for thirty days and thirty nights and frankly they are getting bored. So to provide entertainment B-Deck challenges C-Deck to a game of football. They get it all set up and begin play. B-Deck makes some early gains but C-Deck is unstoppable. They have Rhinoceros and once he gets going you cant stop him. Soon the first half is over and the score is 24-7. The second half begins and while in the huddle Rhinoceros looks over at B-Decks defensive line and sees Centipede on their defensive line. "Give me the ball," he says, "There aren't going to be any centipedes in the new world because I'm crushing this one right here and right now" The Center snaps the ball and the quarterback hands it off to Rhinoceros who begins charging down Centipede. Centipede rears up grabs Rhinoceros by the legs and SLAMS him to the deck. Ball pops loose, centipede grabs the ball. He's rushing down the field weaving in and out and TOUCHDOWN!!! The crowd goes wild! C-Deck's captain, Lion rushes over and says, "Centipede that was amazing! Where were you in the first half?" "Well I was lacing my shoes."
Why couldn’t the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!
Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!
For Halloween I’m going to write “Life” on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers
This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues
“Halloween” = an excuse for girls to dress up like sluts.
Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!
I’ll be your trick if you’ll be my treat.
How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin!
When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? On Fry Day
What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!
What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood
What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us
What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A “hollow-weenie!”
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost (goes).
How do you write a book about halloween? With a ghostwriter.
I’m going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do… by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely,
Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?” The other monster replied, “Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.
The lesson of Halloween is that pretending to be something you’re not will lead to a sweet reward.
I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it’s Election night.
I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I’m dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.
Why dident the skeleten go to the halloween party? Becuse he had no body to go with.
What did the bird say on Halloween? Trick or tweet!
What do Italian’s eat on Halloween? Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)
Why can’t the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!
What do ghosts eat for supper? Spooketi
What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it’s Halloween!!
What is the most important subject a witch learns in school? Spelling.
Last night I was driving home and had a police officer following me. I tried my hardest to go the speed limit. As I was driving, I saw a wild turkey running towards the road. I slammed my breaks but still hit the turkey. The bird flipped over my car and hit the police officer behind me. The cop then turned on his siren and pulled me over. He gave me a ticket for flipping him the bird.
So we went to the Wild's preseason game against the Blues last night and there was a blues player who fell down after blocking a shot with his inner thigh. It reminded me of this goal (http://www.reddit.com/tb/2i8prv) I saw on r/hockey yesterday that JvR scored off his weiner, and told my dad about it.
His response: That's nuts! Good thing it wasn't in their own goal, that would've been a dick move.
I work at Burlington Coat factory and was assigned to work in the shoe department today. A kid comes up and it goes like this.
Me:Is there anything I can help you with today sir?
Kid:No I don't think so
Suddenly a wild Dad appears form a blind corner
The Dad: Yeah he could use some style.
Me: Well I can't help with that right now but I can sure help with shoes
The Dad: Oh alright. Thank you. Have a good day. It was nice shoe meet you
Made my night.
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