A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?
Because they're all not 'C's.
Can I play World War Z without having played World War A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X and Y before?
/r/ShouldIbuythisgame/com…
Jay-Z is DMing a D&D campaign for his son.
Jay-Z's son is playing a fighter and is engaged in a grueling fight with a troll. The troll is clearly too high a difficulty for the fighter.
"Dad," Jay-Z's son exclaims in frustration. "The troll is destroying me!" Just at that moment, from behind a nearby hill appears an army of goblins led by what appears to be an intoxicated lich.
Jay-Z looks at his son and replies with a smirk, "If you're having troll problems, I feel bad for you, son. I've got 99 goblins and a lich on rum."
Jay-Z has invested in a digital security company.
He's got ninety-nine problems but a breach ain't one.
2000’s kids are generation Z and 80’s-90’s kids are generation Y, if we keep going back we get to generation U.
If you have wine from that time is it genuine?
If my son ever came out to be trans then I wouldn’t have a son anymore
My Bluetooth speaker wasn’t working so I threw it into the lake.
In surgery my doctor said, "So what do we have here?" I replied that I broke my arm in 12 places."
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
I told my wife I saw a deer on the way to work.
She said how do you know he was headed to work?
In honor of Mother’s Day, I’d just like to say,
“thank you for your cervix.”
I've started a boat building business in my attic...
...sails are going through the roof.
I got banned from /r/DadJokes for posting, "Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms!"
Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...
Initially I didn’t believe that my chiropractor was any good.
But now I stand corrected.
Guys, today was my first day in the navy and I felt so lost!
My whole life I thought Chewbacca was an Ewok....
I'm so proud. My 12-year old told this joke during dinner: What degree does Dr. Pepper have?
My wife said, “I don’t really understand the science behind human cloning.”
I said, “That makes two of us.”
My grandfather was always terrible until I had my first child
Now he’s a great grandfather
I caught my son chewing on an electrical cord...
so I had to ground him.
He's doing better currently.
And conducting himself properly.
I saw a pack of gummy worms that said “No artificial flavor.”
Who buys gummy worms hoping they’d taste as close to real worms as possible?
I told my dad that home births have skyrocketed since corona; he was confused.
He thought homes were built, not born.
I bought a record at the charity shop the other day, "Sounds That Wasps Make". I took it home and it sounded nothing like Wasps.
That's when I realised I was playing the Bee side.
This is the last thing I need
I have an irrational fear of over-designed buildings.
It's a complex complex complex.
Delighted to say I've finally got a new job installing mirrors!
Nothing fancy, but was something I could always see myself doing.
My psychiatrist says I have an unhealthy obsession with revenge.
I can tolerate algebra, maybe even a little calculus
but graphing is where I draw the line
I wish Covid-19 had started in Las Vegas.
Because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
I hate the word "xenophobia", it sounds so...
I told my parents I was bisexual
My dad asked, "so you like both men and women?"
I responded with, "yeah, but I'm not seeing anyone right now"
He said, "so you must be on stand-bi"
I have a pun for you guys, it’s a one liner
I have a list of friends who love palindromes!
Nell, Edna, Leon, Nedra, Anita, Rolf, Nora, Alice, Carol, Leo, Jane, Reed, Dena, Dale, Basil, Rae, Penny, Lana, Dave, Denny, Lena, Ida, Bernadette, Ben, Ray, Lila, Nina, Jo, Ira, Mara, Sara, Mario, Jan, Ina, Lily, Arne, Bette, Dan, Reba, Diane, Lynn, Ed, Eva, Dana, Lynne, Pearl, Isabel, Ada, Ned, Dee, Rena, Joel, Lora, Cecil, Aaron, Flora, Tina, Arden, Noel, and Ellen.
I ended things with my communist girlfriend.
Doctor: I think your DNA is backwards.
This I getting better hahaha
I am reading a horror novel in Braille.
Something bad is gonna happen, I can feel it.
my grandfather said this today on the dinner table and i was the only one that found it hilarious for no reason at all
G : what type of apples grow on trees ?
my dumbass : idk red and green ?
G : all of them do
wheezes
I see where this is going
What starts with W and ends with T?
Whenever my artistic girlfriend is sad, I let her draw things on my body....
I gave her a shoulder to crayon.
I spent my entire life savings on pasta.
It was worth every penne.
My wife beamed at me and said, “I had no idea our son would go that far!” Tearing up, I stammered, “I know!"
"The trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter!"
I told my daughter, “Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field.” Puzzled, she asked, “What’s that got to do with anything?” I chuckled, "Well, that means..."
I had to break up with this girl who just would not stop counting.
I wonder what she’s up to now.
I saw a 1000 year old oil stain
It was from ancient Greece
A little Christmas song. A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...
I have updated the alphabet for festive period. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z
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