My wife’s name is Vera. Every morning I wake up and say β€œCactus..!!!!”

Well it’s quicker than saying β€œβ€˜Allo Vera...!”

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/robbiebrown64
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
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Dadjoked the little sister today.

Her: Wow, look at this coin purse. It cost twelve dollars.

Me: Why is it that expensive? It looks like it's worth less than half that.

Her: Well, you know...it is the Vera Bradley brand, and name-brand things always cost more.

Me: Well it seems like that is vera bradley priced.

I^felt^so^proud

πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2015
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So my dad uses this drug called Allosig...

Every time he pulls it out of the medicine cabinet, the family hears a great big 'ALLO SIG' from Dad, as if he were a cockney brit saying hi to someone named Sig.

Every bloody time. Same thing happens if any of us need aloe vera.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coz707
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2013
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