Tv Commercials Puns

Against my better judgement, I followed my doctor's advice.

That's my jam!

Her: Hey it's Snowden!

Me: That's impossible. It's hot outside!

TV: I dropped 40 pounds on Jenny Craig!

Dad: Well, did it kill her?

Me: exasperated eye-roll

Dad: I don't know why he's so fucking jolly, he only comes once a year...

If Sherlock Holmes was constipated, would that be "No shit Sherlock"?

Fucking dad

Watching TV and some show has a commercial on and it says "catch up now OnDemand!". I'm only half paying attention to it when my wife looks at me and is like "but what if I want mustard?"

EDIT: Removed accidental extra word.

So I'm watching TV with my daughters. A Saint Jude commercial comes on and shows a bunch of sick kids dying of cancer... both of my daughters let out a compassionate "Awe.."

Me: Hey girls, do you realize how many more kids in America were diagnosed with cancer during the time it took to watch that commercial?

Daughters: Oh my God... I don't even what to think about it! How many?

Me: Tumor.

Commercial comes on TV and my dad asks me who that movie is about. I told him that Ice Cube is one of the main characters, and he is played by his son in the movie.

His response: "What's his name? Crushed Ice?"

Watching TV at my parent's house with my wife a couple of weeks ago.

Commercial comes on advertising the Apocalypse now movie, my dad mentions it and then says

Dad: that was a good movie, did you guys ever see it?

Wife: nope, never seen it!

Dad: oh you should watch it, then watch the remake of it they made a few years later, they re-cast the whole movie with only black people. pauses for dramatic moment It's called A-packa-lips-now

Wife: what...

Awkward pause for maybe two seconds, I chuckled, my mom rolled her eyes and then my wife finally got it.

She nearly died laughing

My dad and I are watching tv, when a commercial for the Maze Runner movie comes on. While half asleep, he says:

"Does it have anything to do with corn?"

Commercial on tv: "I've had nine broken arms..."

Wife: "Nine broken arms? But you only have two arms!"

My whole family was watching TV. As always a viagra commercial strolls along into our TV program. Near the end of the commercial it says, "If you have an erection for longer than 4 hours contact your doctor." Without a moments pause my dad goes, "That line is the best marketing line ever con-COCK-ted

I responded, "knowing you, you probably thought 'long and hard' about that one"

I was so proud, and my dad was too.

During commercial break, a Fiat ad came on TV, showing Godzilla eating Fiat 500s. My mom first said, "guess he's in the mood for Italian?" My dad added, "Yes, he wanted Car-rabba's." I went into the halls of extinction after that.

The first joke was while we were watching tv and a commercial for the new show Atlantis came on, and dad said, "I hear that show is already under water."

The second was when we all got our stockings. Mom had given us scented pencils, and dad said, "You know what those are for right? It's so your writing doesn't stink"

My family was watching TV and a vacuum commercial came on. My dad said "hey we should get a new vacuum!" My mom said "ChiefCharmin's dad, we already have 3." Dad:"I know, but they all suck."

...and the TVs are already playing Christmas commercials!

Me and my dad were watching TV and it was the commercial break and a cellphone commercial came on. They mentioned a unlimited data plan and I said, "I Wish I had an unlimited data plan." He then said, "Well you can, I'm right here."

Just sitting around watching tv, and put this one together on a commercial break.

> Q: What do you call the angry ghost of a turkey? > >A: A poultry-geist