Who was your favorite actress that portrayed Ziyal: Cyia Batten, Tracy Middendorf OR Melanie Smith? And why ?
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Do your worst!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
They were cooked in Greece.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
They’re on standbi
A play on words.
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Or would that be too forward thinking?
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
"We have to go back!" -Jack Shephard
This finale picks up with Jack Shephard (Matthew Fox) on a plane about to land in Los Angeles. He sees an obituary of an unknown person, which devastates him. After landing, he nearly commits suicide by jumping off a bridge, but a nearby car crashes and Jack rushes over to help.
It becomes clear that Jack is a mess. He's drunk and addicted to pills. He attends thr funeral of the unknown person, but no one else shows up. He also calls an unknown woman multiple times, who finally agrees to meet him near the airport. It turns out to be Kate (Evangeline Lilly), revealing that this is actually a flashforward. Jack tells Kate he flies across the Pacific Ocean every weekend hoping the plane will crash and that they made a mistake leaving the island. Kate drives off as he shouts, "We have to go back!"
On the island, the Others invade the beach camp. Sayid (Naveen Andrews), Bernard (Sam Anderson), and Jin (Daniel Dae Kim) kill most of the Others, but Jin misses his shots at the dynamite and the three are captured by the surviving Others.
When Jack's group only sees two explosions go off, Sun (Yunjin Kim) and Rose (L. Scott Caldwell) want to go back to help, but Jack makes everyone continue on towards the radio tower. Eventually, Sawyer (Josh Holloway) and Juliet (Elizabeth Mitchell) head back to help.
Desmond (Henry Ian Cusick) wakes up in the boat to find Mikhail (Andrew Divoff) shooting at him. He dives underwater and swims into the Looking Glass to find Charlie (Dominic Monaghan) tied up and hides in a locker. Mikhail swims in and under Ben's (Michael Emerson) orders, shoots the Others that were station there. Desmond shoots Mikhail with a spear gun. Charlie is able to get the code from the dying Bonnie (Tracy Middendorf), which is actually a musical code. Charlie is the only 815 survivor that could have put it the code.
Charlie turns off the jammer and gets a receives a transmission from Penny (Sonya Walger) who tells him she doesn't know Naomi (Masha Thomason) and doesn't know anything about a boat. Mikhail blows himself up with a grenade which starts to flood the transmission room. Charlie seals himself in to save Desmond and writes "Not Penny's Boat" on his hand to warn Desmond before drowning.
Ben learns about the developments on the beach and discovers that Alex (Tania Raymonde) betrayed him. He takes Alex with on a trek to stop Jack in order to give Alex to Jack's group and reunite her with
... keep reading on reddit ➡
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
When I got home, they were still there.
I won't be doing that today!
[Removed]
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
Where ever you left it 🤷♀️🤭
There hasn't been a post all year!
You take away their little brooms
It was about a weak back.
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
