I turned to her, asked "Do you know what we have here?" removed my sunglasses, "It's a case of he said, tree said."
Ah yes, a Bionicle rant! I want to make it clear before I begin, most of my experience with Bionicle comes from the 2001-2003 era. I'm talking the old comics, Toa/Toa Nuva stuff, the Mask of Light movie, etc. I feel lots of people remember Bionicle and collect 'em, so I wanted to talk about my experiences with this series and why it was so great growing up.
Anyway, the whole idea behind Bionicle was to create this series of action figures that you could basically build. It was like model kits, just minus the glue. However, instead of just simply making the toys and releasing them as is, the creators did something really nuts: They built up a shit ton of lore around it, making into this giant interconnected story that was released over a decade. This included 4 movies, a smattering games, shit tons of comics and books, and a flash game that is pretty much the best one ever created.
The plot is that long ago Mata Nui created the Matoran, but was betrayed by his brother Makuta. He was defeated by his brother and his body became the island or some shit. And from there, chosen warriors called the Toa arrive to defend the island from Makuta's various evil creations.
Bionicle is one of those series that is just rich and dense with its lore, which tends to be pretty insane. You know, like how all the Toa have magical elemental powers and eventually gained upgraded bio-organic forms with new powers. Not to mention monstrous entities like the Bohroks, who are little parasitic masks inside robot shells.
And a lot of this lore was drip-fed to you through the comics or books, or even through the official website. There was a shit ton of lore, more than most kids could keep up with. Hell, I didn't even know how rich the story itself was as a kid! I think that's the magic of the series though and why it's still really popular, even after being cancelled a decade ago.
What I remember most though is the Mask of Light movie, which was basically the culmination of the original Toa/Toa Nuva storyline. It had the Toa discovering the Mask of Light and adventuring in search of the one who can wear it. I like the idea that this movie was the ending to the first arc of the series, it put a nice bow on the Toa's story.
It was also nice seeing Takua rise up and become the seventh Toa. Takua was always a fun character, loved playing as him in the Mata Nui Online Game. That game was dope, it was one of the first episodic games ever made and was a ton of fun. It was so good that
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In the first Toy Story, buzz lightyear denies that he's a children's toy. He genuinely thinks he's a superhero, not a toy. The film also sets it up so that toys CAN move in front of humans if they so choose too. Then why does buzz lightyear, who genuinely does not think he's a toy, act like one when being played with? Why freeze and "play toy", like all the rest of the toys, when Andy comes around? Doesn't he think he's real and not a mere toy? I thought that was his whole issue.
For some reason I never felt it captured the magic of the first three films. Rewatching it and I think this what is lacking:
- Plain and simple, Andy is way better character/owner than Bonnie in every way. Andy was allways happy go lucky while Bonnie is always sad. Also, Andy seemed to really love his toys even as he got older. Bonnie seems to have no real connection to most of them.
- I think the narrative of Forky is well weird. He wants to be trash?
- Way too many storylines that never seem to really interconnect. Its like they keep introducing new ones and never concluding them
- Bonnie's room also lacks the charm of Andy's/the group of toys maybe it is. Felt like the toys weren't all that close "relationship" wise/ no wholesome moments between them. Half of them say maybe one line the entire movie.
- Buzz Lightyear is made into a very boring character
- Bo Peep's personality is completely different from the first two. She isn't the wholesome, sweet toy she was in the first two. She's kind of bratty in this one
- I know realism is the furthest thing in anybody's mind in Toy Story. But even than, Woody by chance running into Bo Peep? At least make how they meet somewhat believable.
- I wish they would have just explored further the plotlines of the toys we already met rather than introduced all new ones.
- All the toys are so serious in this movie, no real funny moments/one-liners
- How did Bonnie never notice that Woody was one of the six toys she had in the RV?
- At the end of the day, a lot of the toys just kind of came off as annoying for the majority of the movie
- Since when was Bo Peep Molly's toy?
- WHERE WAS KEN????? Tbf, it made sense not including him sense storyline wise he didn't become one of Bonnie's toys but he was comedy gold. I could never stop laughing when he was on screen in Toy Story 3. And if this movie needed anything, it was comic relief. Barbie was another great character for that matter.
I was drunk at work (hotel) this past Friday and I don’t get back until Tuesday. I’m worried the assistant manager said something to our GM. To be fair, he himself claims to have 3 DUIs which is why he’s been sober for a few years. But he is prone to gossip and dramatics.
My only saving grace is that I’m one of the only workers who is fully trained so firing me would throw a huge wrench in their staffing. Also my other coworker just got a DUI. Also my HR director has a DUI. DUIs aren’t the same as drinking at work, I know, but I find it comforting
However, one person got fired years ago for drinking at work but only because she was drinking with guests during a banquet event and ended up on the floor.
Anyways, anxiety is getting to me. Waiting for corner store to open. I’m constantly refreshing our guests surveys seeing if anyone mentioned being checked in by a drunk girl.
Please share stories, good or bad.
One day while Andy was masturbating, Woody got wood. He could no longer help himself! He watched as Andy stroked his juicy kawaii cock. He approached Andy which startled him and make him pee everywhere on the floor and on Woody too. Being drenched in his urine made him harder than ever! Woody: "Andy Senpai! I'm alive and I want to be INSIDE OF YOU." Andy: "Oh Woody Chan! I always knew you were alive! I want to stuff you up my kawaii ass!" Woody grabbed a bunch of flavored lube and rubbed it all over his head Woody: "Oh my! It's cherry flavored lube! Cherry is my favorite! Woody then stuffed his head up into Andy's tight ass! The other toys around the room watched intently as Woody shoved his head back and forth into Andy's nice ass, continuously making a squishy wet noise. The other toys also became aroused and they all gathered around Woody and Andy and started to urinate all over them, and then they started to masturbate. Andy: "Oh my goodness, Woody Chan! You are churning my insides up so well! Your nose is stimulating my prostate! OH YES! All the other toys became so aroused by this, that they could not help themselves anymore! They pushed Woody completely inside, and they all went inside. All of them wanted to be inside Andy's nice round ass. Andy: "No wait guys! My ass cannot hold this much! I'm getting so full! All the toys went inside of poor squirming Andy and pretty much, he was beyond full, and died from having his insides completely damaged. The mother came inside and found Andy, dead with a huge ass hemorrhage on his anus, with a HUGE belly full of toys.
r/Lawrence which is the sub for the college town of Lawrence Kansas has deleted a story about hazardous chemicals in the drinking water from one of its primary news sources the Lawrence Times. The comments all appear to be in support of poisonous water. Censorship and propaganda at its finest.
Can you please add a flair for piss drinking? :-D
Do toys not remember what kids do with them when being played with? I find it hard to believe that Andy never used the karate chop action when he played with buzz, but when woody used his karate chop action to escape sids he was surprised he even had it
