A list of puns related to "Tiger I"
He had a hole in one.
Ba dum tish.
And a lifetime ban from the zoo
β¦the other four letters?
I don't really believe it though, if it was spotted its probably a leopard.
He was lion.
I'd be lion
We are going through a Rocky patch!
He should have picked a different driver.
I immediately wiped it off and apologised.
Now it just says, "tger."
I was sitting in some beautiful seats, just past third base down on ground level. A good spot for some foul balls.
After several whiffs, one finally gets close enough to my father, which he promptly takes in the ribs instead of catching, and like before, the bat boy runs by to pick up the ball - only this time he doesn't throw it back into the crowd. Makes our whole section upset (that, and all the beer we were drinking) so he gets booed every time he walks by now.
The dad joke, however, comes from the guy behind me.
"That kid better watch out...I'm gonna talk to his dad. Batman!"
Pfizer! Pfizer! Pfizer!
The golfers didn't want to bear with him about the whereabouts of Tiger Woods and ran towards another bearing.
The tigers were having a great time, roaring, baring teeth and in general having a great time. The cats were sitting quietly off to the side. The tigers asked the cats, βWhy so quiet ? Donβt you like to have some boisterous fun ?β The cats replied, βOh yes, we used to be tigers too. Until we got married.β
PS. (This sounded way better when my friend told me in the original Malayalam language slang poocha-pulee)
So weβve got this FisherPrice Projector Mobile thing that projects a rotating imaging onto the ceiling. (Very nice little thing, highly suggest for babies)
Anyways... Weβve got it set up in the living room and Wife, Son, and I are laying on the ground in the dark watching it go round and round. Itβs Jungle Themed, so a lion, elephant giraffe, tiger, a few monkeys, and so on...
Weβre pointing out the different animals to Son and heβs repeating a few words here and there... When he starts waving and saying βHiβ as a new animal rotates in.
So Wife goes, βHere comes the Lion. Can you say Hi to the Lion?β
And Son waves and says βHi!β and giggles.
Wife: βAnd thereβs an Elephant! Can you Hi to the Elephant?β
Son: βHi... tootsβ
Wife: βYes! Toots! And hereβs the next animal. Can you wave to the tiger?β
Son: βHi!β
Wife: βThatβs the βHi of the Tigerββ
Me: β... π π πβ
Wife: βYou love me... Look Son! A Zebra!β
Pros: Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Tom Brady
Cons: Al Capone, Frank Abagnale, Ted Bundy
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
Walk it, and pitch to the Tiger.
A neighbor-toothed tiger.
The Savory Tooth Tiger !
But a Tiger Wood!
Clown asks: "What do you call someone posing as a fake Italian chef? An im-pasta"
Man doesn't laugh
Clown asks: "What do you get when you cross a tiger and a bear? A tiger and a bear seeking revenge."
No response
Clown asks: "Which super hero asks the most questions? Wonder Woman"
Nothing
Clown asks: "Have you heard of the baseball team the Chicago Hot Dogs? They are the wurst"
Doesn't crack a smile
Clown asks: "Why was the alcoholic so annoying? He wined too much"
Clown starts to get nervous
Clown asks: "The disinterested hockey player got a penalty. What was it? Boarding"
Blank look
Clown asks: "What is a nun's favorite card game? Old Maid"
Yawn
Clown asks: "How do crustaceans celebrate birthdays? With crab cakes"
Annoyed
Clown asks: "What do you call a champion deer? A Win-doe"
grasping at straws
Finally Clown asks: "How do sheep sleep when they have nightmares? Baaaaadly"
He never laughs. Clown gives him his $100 and asks "Did any of my jokes make you laugh?"
Man says "No pun-in-ten-did"
Well, certainly not the Tiger, because the Dalmatian wouldn't be spotted.
Again....this is from a 1st grader...
Knock knock
Who's there
A panda Bear
A panda bear who?
No, you're supposed to say What Panda Bear...
Ok What panda bear?
Umm......a tiger?
Not a dad joke...but I laughed anyway
If the Chicago Bears moved to Detroit, then Detroit would have the Lions, the Tigers, and the Bears. Oh MI!
In the Tiger Woods.
He walks up to a zebra and says, "hey zebra, guess what? I'm a tiger." The zebra rolls it's eyes and the lion walks away. Next, the lion sees a giraffe and says, "hey giraffe, guess what? I'm a tiger." The giraffe scoffs and turns away. Finally, the lion walks up to a chimpanzee and says, "yo chimp, guess what? I'm a tiger..."
The chimp looks right back and the lion and says, "dude, will you quit lyin'..."
Have you heard of the novel "Revenge of the Tiger" by Claude Balls?
...and so off they went two by two, and within a few weeks Noah heard the chatter of tiny monkeys, the snarl of tiny tigers and the stomp of baby elephants.
Then he heard something he didn't recognise⦠a loud, revving buzz coming from the woods. He went in to find out what strange animal's offspring was making this noise, and discovered a pair of snakes wielding a chainsaw.
"What on earth are you doing?" he cried. "You're destroying the trees!"
"Well Noah," the snakes replied, "we tried to multiply as you bade us, but we're adders⦠so we have to use logs."
The MGM lion is doing his thing at the beginning and she says "oooh that's a scary tiger"
I quickly retorted, "that's a lion you know it!"
But a Tiger Wood
Q: How can you trust a tiger?
A: Because you know he's not lion.
We were sat watching TV and I said "I'm going to have a lie-in tomorrow", she replies with "I'm going to have a Tiger"...it isnt perfect but she got me nonetheless.
There are a number of ways to catch a tiger, but following these simple steps will guarantee success:
I was in the room with my dad when he was watching the news, they mentioned that some event had been cancelled when a Tiger had been spotted in the area.
"They must be confused, if it was spotted it was probably a Leopard"
Cue dirty look
Context: I work at an aerospace company. There are two airlines that just contacted Us for work cost estimates: Lion Air and TigerAir. Designer: "I'm swamped with this Lion Air quote, I'll have to push Tiger's to tomorrow..." Manager: "Lions, tigers, and Baers, oh my!" (Baer is a private charter airline) He stood in the corner after that as we groaned.
And a lifetime ban from the zoo
We are going through a Rocky patch!
Easy tiger!
A bear and a tiger seeking revenge.
But a Tiger Wood.
Tiger
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