on how to make ends meat.
It's remarkable.
So, yeah. Three stars.
One's a curfew.
The other's a fur queue.
I can't put it down!
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
The relief is in tents.
DADGAD.
Guitarists will know.
Scandinavians
It was a fee-line
It's fantastic for raisin awareness.
#1
#2
The purr-cussion section.
On a scale from 1 to 10, it is 10/10.
I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw!
It turns out I have Tom Jones Syndrome. My doctor says it's not unusual.
Because you just can’t beat it!
Spy-cy!
Good King Wenceslost.
A Wrap-tor!
That is all.
Summa Comb Laude
It is wise to take the lesser of two weevils
In fact, you have to sign a naan-diss closure agreement every time you eat there.
Furry tales
No one sleighs like Santa
Getting all the fur off your tongue.
Cranes!
(Courtesy of my ten-year-old son. I'm one proud dad.)
The nyan-ties.
It’s remarkable
It had mittens.
Kitchen counter... the groans could be heard by the neighbors
A vacuum cleaner
It's a big plus.
...that it was a pity that Curiosity killed the cat, but Satisfaction brought it back.
A felinthropist
So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
Using Vlad-blocker.
Velcro.
Drink them.
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
Because it's 10/10
Hands down...
