My wife got mad at me because I wouldn’t stop singing β€œI’m a Believer” by the Monkees. At first, I thought she was kidding.

But then I saw her face.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiosMioMan2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing β€œThe Lion Sleeps Tonight” is always just a whim away...

A whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoalaTeaNip
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
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A guy keeps calling me up and singing "prince charming" and "stand and deliver" down the phone to me. I keep telling him to stop calling...

But he's adamant.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mattqwerty85
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Singing in the shower is pretty fun.

Until you get soap in your mouth, then it becomes a soap opera.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GatoAmigo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Why can't pirates sing the alphabet

Cause they get lost at C

πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeytherealking
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the pony not do well at his singing audition?

Unfortunately, he was a little hoarse.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TourmalinePhoenix
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the best compliment you can give to singing mountains?

Wow, that's quite a range!

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RandyB1
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2021
🚨︎ report
My Wife said she would leave me if I didn’t stop singing songs by the Monkees, I thought she was joking

But then I saw her face

πŸ‘︎ 148
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DudeManDude__
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2021
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing The Lion Sleeps Tonight is always just a whim away /r/Jokes/comments/o1sbpj/…
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shmeggt
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What do the Black Eyed Peas sing when they make honey?

Imma Be

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dogwalker4k
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a singing Computer?

A Dell

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/randomguy2322
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2021
🚨︎ report
A blonde goes into a church and asks the minister, "How much does it cost to rent a church singing group?"He said,"Do you mean a choir?"

She said "Fine... How much does it cost to acquire a church singing group?"

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my son today β€œWhy do you always sing to your corn on the cob before eating it?”

His explanation was music to my ears.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fordskis
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me if I could sing all the songs from the Shrek soundtrack. I said "No, just some."

"... BODY once told me..."

πŸ‘︎ 71
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
How do singing groups get new members?

They a-choir them.

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fireburner80
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2021
🚨︎ report
The black eyed peas can sing us a really good song...

but the chickpeas can only hummus one.

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rob_Haggis
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
🚨︎ report
An opera singer claims that he can heal people just by singing. What's his name?

Placebo Domingo

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/scardeal
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2021
🚨︎ report
What sings funny songs all night long?

Weird Owl

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2021
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What rock group consists of four guys that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tumalditamadre
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife laughed, "The lottery is a tax on fools who can't do math!" I shrugged and said, "You never know! Anybody can win the lottery." Folding her arms, she asked, "Do you even know the chances of a person winning the lottery?" I shot back, "Yes!! 100%!!"

"A person always wins!"

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Teacher: Sing the alphabet.

Student: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, phosphorus, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z.

Teacher: How did you say phosphorus instead of L, M, N, O, and P?

Student: Because phosphorus is EL-EM-EN-TAL P.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What kind of wood that can sing,dance and act

Bollywood

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Broke_Gam3r
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2021
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"Fool me once - I'm mad. Fool me twice - How could you? Fool me three times - You're officially that guy, okay?"
πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Retroman_86
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2021
🚨︎ report
How do Mormons sing along to The Weeknd?

Save your tears for a latter day

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlitWrit
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I went to The Weeknd's concert. He invited me onstage to sing the chorus to one of his songs!

But there were so many stage lights turned towards me that…

I said, ooh, I'm blinded by the lights.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drawsouza
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me to stop singing "Wonderwall" to her

I said maybe...

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/On_Cap_No_God
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
🚨︎ report
I can't stop singing Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin songs...

I think I've got the crooner virus.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MuzikPhreak
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
🚨︎ report
I really need to stop looking at the internet today. Everything seems to be an April Fool's gag.

Just kidding :)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-Syldon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
My singing ensemble director told us we had to come to a second show.

It was re-choired!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2021
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" is always just a whim away

A whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 379
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Papiys
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth

Then it’s a soap opera

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MasterDistrict1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2021
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight'

...is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away...

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OffDutyTaoist
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a singing computer?

A Dell

πŸ‘︎ 378
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rob_Haggis
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth.

Then it becomes a soap opera.

πŸ‘︎ 60
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JesusSaves002
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing β€œa lion sleeps tonight” is always a whim away.

A whim away, a whim away, a whim away...

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/No-Sock4401
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play instruments?

Mount Rushmore.

πŸ‘︎ 83
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa_G_
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2021
🚨︎ report
I feel a constant urge to sing The Lion Sleeps Tonight

It's always just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away....

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BurnedBurger84
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song but...

the Chick Peas can only humm us one!

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
The black eyed peas can sing us a tune

But the chick peas can only hummus one

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jcbrnld
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song...

But the Chickpeas can only hummus a tune.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife told me to stop singing β€œI’m a believer” because it’s annoying. At first I thought she was kidding...

But then I saw her face.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cigarandcreamsoda
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth

Then it becomes a soap opera

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What is it called when your singing in the shower and shampoo gets in your mouth?

A soap opera

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mm401
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
🚨︎ report
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song

but the chick peas can only hummus one

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/alexbeltran43
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
I can't stop singing Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra songs.

I think I have croonervirus

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mykeuk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Whenever you're in the jungle, the urge to sing.

Is only ever

A whim away A whim away

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AmethystMonkey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report

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