First time I have seen my dad in a year and he drops this on me.

I walked out to the garage where my dad was working on his motorcycle. Over in the corner I saw two bicycle's .

"Hey dad when did y'all get bicycles?"

"Oh idk when she got those but I told her she can't be riding those around here"

I looked at him puzzled for a second and he says

"Boy it's not legal to be pedaling pussy on the side of the street"

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📅︎ Dec 25 2015
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Dad told me this one some years ago.

A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine, shaking it up and watching all the bubbles. A while later a Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had. The little boy replied, "This is the most powerful liquid in the world, it's called turpentine." The Priest said, "No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you take some of this Holy Water and rub it on a pregnant woman's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby." The little boy replied, "You put a drop of this turpentine on a cat's ass, he'll pass a motorcycle!"

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Jul 11 2014
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