I guess people are just going crazy about the exterior of that new cargo ship that was named for the bear from the Jungle Book.

Personally, I’m tired of the hullabaloo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/astrosmash77
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
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The Jungle Book is a movie that answers the age old question:

Does a bear scat in the woods?

(Zee-ba-da-zap-dooey)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Laringar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
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What do you get when you cross an avocado with The Jungle Book?

Guacamowgli.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DingoAltair
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2018
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What dip does Shere Khan from the Jungle Book prefer?

Guacamowgli

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jogge_
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
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I was asking my little brother if he knew who Baloo from the Jungle Book was.

My dad butted in after my brother said he didn't know.

"Maybe he knows Red or Green."

I fucking lost it.

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πŸ“…︎ May 14 2016
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I hear the Jungle Book is getting a remastered release.

It'll be released on BalooRay.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/macrocephale
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2014
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The Jungle Book

I watched the movie with my kids and came up with this out of the blue.

"Wow, the movie was so nice, it baloo me away"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cricketguy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2016
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I dare you to read this

What tree do you wipe your hands on? A palm tree!

I heard a scary math joke, but I’m 2^^2 to tell it!

Have you heard of that new movie, β€œConstipation”? Well it doesn’t matter, it never came out.

I hurt myself when I went to a theme park in florida. When I went to the doctor, he started wrapping up my left leg, but then I pointed at my right and said β€œNo, doc, it’s dis knee.”

Last night I got mugged by 6 dwarves. Not Happy.

When Queen Elizabeth farts, everyone in the room must pretend like nothing happened. Noble Gasses don’t cause reactions, after all.

What’s the difference between a seal and a sea lion? One electron.

What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises? It becomes Daytrogen!

I called the animal shelter today and said "I've found six kittens in a suitcase in the woods." They said "Are they moving?" I replied "I don't know, but that would explain the suitcase."

Why can’t you trust Atoms? Because they make up everything!

Why do nerds wear glasses? It helps with division.

Why should you tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? You don’t wanna wake the sleeping pills.

What twitches and is found at the bottom of the ocean? A nervous wreck!

What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller!

What do you call a 3 foot tall psychic on the run from the law? A small medium at large!

Help, I can’t stop reading books with female protagonists! I’m a heroine addict!

How did Sparticus react when he ate his wife for dinner? He was gladiator!

When does a joke become a dad joke? When the punchline becomes apparent!

19 and 20 got into a fight… 21.

My friend told me, β€œPeople who sell meat are disgusting!” So I said, β€œYeah, well people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer!”

How can turtles take photos of themselves? Shell-fie sticks!

What do you call a secret agent molecule? Bond… ionic bond. β€œTaken, not shared.” What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? (Cut this part, but make a screeching noise)

How much does Santa’s sleigh cost? $0, it’s on the house.

If America switched from pounds to kilograms overnight there would be mass confusion.

I had a splinter once; it eventually got out of hand.

I’m going to go stand outside. If anyone asks, I’m outstanding.

Most people are shocked to find out how terrible an electrician I am!

What do mermaids wash their fins with? Tide What’s the coolest place to use the bathroom? The Lil Jon

Did you know that on average, people want three covers on their bed at all times? But that’s just a blanket statem

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kinjago
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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Got my friend with a good one.

So last night I was at the movies with a few friends, seeing the Jungle Book. At one point during the movie, my friend Faith got up to get a refill on her popcorn and drink. When she got back, she complained to me that she tripped on the stairs and spilled her popcorn that she just had refilled. I looked her in the eye and said, "I guess you could say you Faith-planted".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FLIGHTxWookie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2016
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