Sometimes my CCNA gives me golden opportunities for puns. Question to know the answer if by end of section: βwhat does a successful ping verify?β
Why, the defeat of the hun army and the safety of China of course!
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︎ Jun 26 2021
I went to a warehouse that held replacement keyboard keys. Huge bins overflowing with letters, numbers, function keys, boxes blocking the aisles full of arrows, and Windows and Apple keys. Space bars everywhere!
They were out of Control.
Luckily I found an Escape.
I got Home eventually.
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︎ May 30 2021
Bread is like the sun.
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.
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︎ Jul 02 2021
In Jamaica, a slice of apple pie costs about $3.50. In the Bahamas, it costs about $4.00.
Those are the pie rates of the caribbean.
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︎ Apr 16 2021
Whatβs the worst part of having an apple addiction?
You canβt see the doctor about it.
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︎ Apr 19 2021
Did you hear about the snowman who had issues with the sun coming up?
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︎ Jul 05 2021
I woke up early wondering when the sun would rise...
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︎ Jun 28 2021
The great apple?
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︎ Jun 17 2021
I waited & stayed up all night trying to figure out where the sun was...
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︎ Jun 27 2021
I read a two page article on the sun
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︎ Jun 20 2021
I was told the bucks were losing to the Suns
That really made me yawnis
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︎ Jul 07 2021
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon."
"That is the problem. You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
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︎ Jan 10 2021
Why couldn't the apple marry the melon...
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︎ Jul 03 2021
What watches over a castle when the sun goes down?
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︎ May 11 2021
Whoβs older, the sun or the moon?
The moon, because they let her come out at night
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︎ Jun 17 2021
What holds the sun up in the sky
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︎ Jun 22 2021
I woke up this morning to find two birds sitting in the sun in our backyard eating ice cream.
They were Basking Robins.
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︎ Apr 26 2021
I got second degree burns on my head from being out in the sun too long...
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︎ Jun 13 2021
Why did the dad love his sun?
Because he was really bright.
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︎ Jun 06 2021
I ordered some ripe, juicy, golden yellow mangoes from a grocery store. But all the mangoes they sent me were green.
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︎ Apr 23 2021
If the Earth is the third planet from the Sun...
...does that mean that every country is a third-world country?
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︎ Apr 05 2021
Did you hear about the break-in at the Apple store?
The police are looking for iWitnesses.
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︎ May 08 2021
I never thought the sun really goes around the earth
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︎ Apr 02 2021
My wife and I are finally fulfilling my lifelong dream of visiting The Golden Gate in person.
She said, βWhat would you do when you finally see it?β
I said, βIβll cross the bridge when I get there.β
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︎ Dec 06 2020
Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face"
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︎ Jun 29 2021
From my six years daughter: what kind of bread does the sun like?
A heart shaped bread. (she pronounced it "hot" with a heavy British accent). This is her Valentine day joke. I am a proud dad.
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︎ Feb 13 2021
Grandma is always saying to me ' Hey what's the name of that German guy again who keeps taking my stuff '
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
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︎ Jun 23 2021
Next month, Iβm going to fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing The Golden Gate in San Francisco in person.
My wife said, βWhat are you going to do when you finally see it?β
Me: Iβll cross that bridge when I get there.
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︎ Jul 10 2020
After getting back from the beach, my daughter said, βHey, look! Iβm tan from the sun!β
I shook her hand. βItβs very nice to meet you! Iβm Dad from Earth.β
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︎ May 17 2021
What do cannibals serve at the beginning of dinner party?
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︎ Jun 02 2021
Did you know a colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence?
For example
- I ate my friend's lunch
- I ate my friend's colon
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︎ Jul 04 2021
SpongeBob may be the main character of the show.
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︎ Jun 16 2021
Did you hear about the guy who made a fortune investing in apple?
Turns out he was in cider trading
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︎ Mar 27 2021
Would you like to be the sun to my life?
Her: yes, I really would!
Me: good, so stay 92 million miles away from me!
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︎ May 08 2021
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81.
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︎ May 25 2021
I watched a documentary on how they built the Golden Gate Bridge.
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︎ Jan 27 2021
The one and only acceptable way of advertising
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︎ Jun 25 2021
My friend has the perfect plan, he says we can travel to the sun...
We just have to go at night
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︎ May 02 2021
I would cheat the Golden Globes. Hell, I would even manipulate the Academy Awards. But I would NEVER
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︎ Jan 29 2021
A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3 in the Bahamas
These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
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︎ Feb 02 2021
A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas...
These are the Pie rates of the Caribbean
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︎ Mar 22 2021
Bread is like the Sun
Rises in the yeast, sets in the waist.
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︎ Apr 05 2021
whatβs the worst thing about having an apple addiction?
you canβt see a doctor about it
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︎ Apr 20 2021
Bread is like the sun.
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.
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︎ Apr 27 2021
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