Do you know whats the best thing about dead batteries?
There's a woman in the park selling batteries...
She sells, C cells by the seesaw.
I put a battery in the charger
I found a load of batteries washed up on the beach.
I was collecting C Cells on the sea shore.
I accidentally left some AA batteries in my pocket when I put them in the wash
That's what I call clean energy
Robin: “The Batmobil isn’t starting!” Batman: “Did you charge the battery?”
Robin: “What the hell is a tery?”
The other day I saw a bucket at the hardware store with a sign that said: dead batteries - $1 each.
I thought to myself “these should be free of charge”.
The store near me is having a sale on batteries.
If you buy two packs, they'll throw in a pack of dead ones, free of charge.
F in the chat for all the batteries in the world who have died.
My friend sat on a battery the other day.
I asked if they were shocked?
I know, I know, it’s a revolting joke.
The cops caught two fellas, one drinking battery acid and the other eating fireworks
One was charged, the other was let off
What did the potato chip bag say to the battery?
I’m Frito Lay if you’re Eveready.
How well did the battery made using chicken ovules work out you ask?
I love it when I restock the battery drawer
It just feels nice to have all this power.
The police arrested two kids yesterday during a protest. One was drinking battery acid and the other was eating firecrackers.
They charged one, and lit the other off.
A car battery was arrested by the cops for causing trouble at the bar
But they had to let him go, they couldn’t find anything to charge him with.
My phone was showing "Battery low". So I placed it on top of the cupboard.
It worked. Can't see the notification any more.
As we turned down the street I told my kids to bring batteries.
I then pointed to the “no outlet” sign.
When you are in charge of the twitter account during national battery day
What did the Lithium ion battery say to the Zinc-Carbon battery?
Have you read the book batteries not included by:
How did the battery know the letter was for him?
It was addressed to current resident!
Why did the king eat a bunch of batteries?
So, I was on the train the other day, and you know how it takes a while to get to the city, well my phone battery was flat and I didn't have a book, so I was a bit bored, but then I realised that there is all this cool graffiti on the tunnel walls... and um... so my phone was dead... and.. the city?
Oh darn it! I lost my train of thought.
I was checking out at the grocery store and the cashier didn’t put the batteries in the same bag with my food and I said it’s cool go ahead and put them in the same bag I don’t care he looked at me with a straight face and said…
Is that how you get your electrolytes?
So a dead battery walks into a bar and orders a drink. He asks the bartender how much.
R: "Batman, the batmobile is making a clicking sound and won't start." BM: "Check the battery."
The energizer bunny was arrested for battery.
This joke keeps going and going.
Edit; Did you hear...? The energizer bunny was charged with battery.
Did you hear about the store giving away empty batteries? They were free of charge?
The end of my battery has corrosion...
Battery salesmen are the best
They always have the most energy
I heard the store was giving away dead batteries.
Apparently they're free of charge.
Did you hear about the battery squisher who went to court?
My friend asked me to plug his phone to the wall since it only had 20% of battery left.
So I asked him how can he lose 80% of the battery and still work with it.
My friend has this weird addiction where he walks into a room and takes the batteries off all clocks.
He claims he can stop it at any time.
I took dead batteries from the store
They were free of charge.
Robin: “The Batmobil isn’t starting!” Batman: “Did you charge the battery?”
Robin: “What the hell is a tery?”
Saw a sign at the store that said "used batteries"
I'm guessing they were free of charge.
Police arrested two boys today. One was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one, and let the other one off.
Whenever my friend walks into a room, he has this weird habit of taking the batteries out of all the clocks.
He claims he can stop it at any time.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
