I bought a record player the other day, but it only plays Bach.
It would be nice if it played forward too.
A blonde goes into a church and asks the minister, "How much does it cost to rent a church singing group?"He said,"Do you mean a choir?"
She said "Fine... How much does it cost to acquire a church singing group?"
I can’t afford Bach and Handel concerts this week.
What happened when Johann Sebastian Bach dropped his violin?
Backup singers re-choired
Q:What was the first choir ever called? A:The prior
More than 1 000 pieces of music by Johann Sebastian Bach have been preserved,
along with nearly 900 by Carl Philipp Emanuel Bach, nearly 400 by Johann Christian Bach, more than 300 by Johann Christoph Friedrich Bach, and nearly 200 by Wilhelm Friedemann Bach.
Together with as many as 200 more surviving compositions by other members of the Bach dynasty, scholars estimate that about 3 000 works are preserved in total, a collection that we today know as the Baroque Bach mountain.
Did you hear about those cowboys who started a choir?
They weren’t very good at first, but they practised and now they’re an OK Chorale
What do you call the bass in dog choir?
I was talking to my choir teacher and she asked me if Icing well.
I told her I don't work in a bakery
My daughter got out of choir practice. She was talking about who her favorite conductors were, and was really excited about her favorite ones, because she said they were very good conductors.
Did they stick their fingers in an electrical socket?
"No... Why..?"
Well, then, how do you know if they were good conductors or not?
What is a choir’s favorite part of dinner?
Why did Bach throw away his harpsichord?
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
What’s the difference between an Indian restaurant and a Vietnamese restaurant?
Indian places are naan profit, Vietnamese places are pho profit.
Anyone who can spell the word drawer backwards...
Who were the greenest Presidents in US history?
How do you track Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints!
Argon enters a bar, the bartender says “We don’t serve noble gases here.”
There are only two white people in the movie Black Panther
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
What did the left eye say to the right eye when they got married?
'Eye-do'
This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.
The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!
Cred once again my sis wants credit lol
What was a very common name in the middle ages?
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the... Bottom...
(as told by my 5yo son, I'm so proud)
What pan is the best to make sushi in?
I accidentally dropped one of my Bach CDs
Unfortunately, I baroque it.
I said to my wife, "I need to call the doctor today." Concerned, she asked, "Which doctor?"
"No, the regular kind!" I laughed.
I've just deleted all the German names off my pre owned iPhone..
Did you know 10+10 and 11+11 are the same?
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face"
Why did J. S. Bach always wear really skimpy bathing suits?
He loved to feel the air on the G string.
Did you know that your pupils are the last parts to stop working after you die?
Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.
The elderly wife in church turned to her husband and said, “I’ve just done a silent fart. What should I do?”
He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.
Oh the tangled web we weave ...
Grandma is always saying to me ' Hey what's the name of that German guy again who keeps taking my stuff '
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
I would go Bach to the store so much, I would go baroque from spending so much.
I got dishonourably discharged from the Navy yesterday for accidentally boarding a different vessel.
Looking forward to the Fibonacci convention this year, it's supposed to be really special..
..and as big as the last two put together.
Why did Bach have no money?
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