I'm still figuring out how to properly wear a face covering. Before I could master the art I was robbed of my beloved mask...
It was stolen from right under my nose.
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Oct 12 2020
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state of the art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
Theyβre calling it Mercedes-clenz
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Sep 25 2020
The result of an art competition...
ποΈ 16
π
οΈ Aug 07 2020
I was pondering some of the practical arts that are dying out like silversmithing and coppersmithing.
One of the most tragic is the art of hand making exit signs which is really on the way out.
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Aug 08 2020
I just read in the newspaper: "Painting stolen from art museum found by a set of dustbins."
Those dustbins must be very intelligent.
ποΈ 13
π
οΈ Jul 17 2020
The only type of art that people despised
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Jun 13 2020
Who improved the art of stealing to perfection?
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ May 16 2020
He knows the subtle art of denial
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Apr 30 2020
My dad was bragging about his new hearing aid. βState of the Art,β he said, βIt cost me a fortune.β
I said, βAwesome. What type is it?β
He said, β Two thirty.β
ποΈ 10k
π
οΈ Oct 12 2018
I was going to study the art of treating the body by rubbing and kneading my wife's body to stimulate circulation...
But then I found out that would be massage-ony.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Mar 19 2020
The art of policing
ποΈ 16
π
οΈ Nov 29 2019
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
ποΈ 33
π
οΈ Sep 20 2019
I've been trying to read a book called "The Advanced Art of Lockpicking"
But I just can't get into it.
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Aug 15 2019
I made it to the final round of the Art Competition, but didnβt win.
It turned out to be a draw.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Aug 29 2019
My friends always say contemplating the meaning of art is the most philosophical side to art...
But when Iβm drawing, deciding β2B or not 2Bβ is the real question.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Aug 29 2019
I am a huge fan of the art of cooking steaks.
When done right, it is a rare medium done well.
ποΈ 26
π
οΈ Sep 20 2018
Someone should start a line of houses with state-of-the-art security systems
Call it "Sure-Lock Homes".
ποΈ 13
π
οΈ May 17 2018
If Metallica went to the Jim Henson school of Arts and Media...
Would they graduate with a Master of Puppets?
(Kudos to my brother for this one.)
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ May 08 2019
Both my kids are liberal arts majors, and they seem overwhelmed at the lack of job prospects.
ποΈ 12
π
οΈ Jan 02 2019
What's a magician skilled in the art of hickeys called?
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Dec 27 2018
The art of dad jokes
Words words words PUNch line.
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Sep 25 2018
What is the name of the art movement popularized in 1920's Germany by dogs who sought to unite art and industrial design alongside artists such as Kandinsky and Paul Klee?
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Mar 12 2018
What do you call the art of Freezer meditation?
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Oct 23 2018
I have mastered the art of brewing tea
ποΈ 26
π
οΈ May 31 2017
For the final piece of coursework in my art diploma, I used my knife to cut a line across Mr Hamill and Mr Wahlberg just after they'd finished eating.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Sep 28 2018
My town's local art festival this weekend missed an opportunity to call itself Total Eclipse of the Art.
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Aug 20 2017
What I love about Bob Ross, is that he always has a happy touch on the entire landscape of the art of painting
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Apr 28 2017
Which US state has state-of-the-art trains?
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Jan 19 2018
The Art of Mandolin War
ποΈ 60
π
οΈ Feb 13 2013
What form of art hurts the most?
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Jun 12 2017
Ever heard of the Indian Martial Art move which is known to make people laugh?
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Mar 28 2016
The art of being humerus
While walking through the art festival with the family, I was showing my kids how anything could be considered art when we came across plaster castings of animal head bones.
Without missing a beat, I pointed out: "I guess this would be called skulptures"
At least the artist laughed... when my youngest told me I wasn't funny
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Apr 08 2017
The youth center in my town is teaching the art of dad joking well.
ποΈ 19
π
οΈ May 27 2014
Ghostbusta Rhymes (the art of Justin Hager)
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ May 14 2014
What is the best set of tools for martial arts fighter?
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Dec 01 2016
Language doesn't matter in the art of dad joke
My first language is Arabic. This conversation happened in Arabic with my dad. So I was telling my dad that I got an A in one of my courses and he asked me what course. I wrote it as math but in Arabic letters and I didn't use the Arabic word for it. And in Arabic the word math sounds a lot like the word for died.
Me: math
Dad: my condolences
ποΈ 40
π
οΈ Dec 17 2014
Cracked.com analyzes the fine art of the "dadjoke"
Figured this would be appropriate here: (mildly nsfw [foul language in article])
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-lame-jokes-you-start-telling-as-soon-as-you-become-dad/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fanpage&utm_campaign=new+article&wa_ibsrc=fanpage%2F
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Apr 16 2014
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