Do your worst!
It really does, I swear!
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
They’re on standbi
Buenosdillas
Pilot on me!!
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
When I got home, they were still there.
I won't be doing that today!
You take away their little brooms
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
[Removed]
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
Do you like lists? I sure do. I'm ZedInstead and I'm retarded. I can't write DD and numbers hurt my smooth brain but I do have a specific set of skills. These are my feelings towards Ken Griffen.
Currently I have three projects going.
- The Forrest Gump GME Meme Movie: Part 25 was posted last week - If you haven't watched yet, start from the beginning(full scene list in comments). Still working on 3 more scenes so stay tuned!
- SuperStonk Guide: Issue 14 was posted Friday morning - Comment in the latest issue to be on the super awesome subscription service!
- The List: The OG list can be found here. Let's talk about the new list!
It started out as my own personal address book of the wrinkle brains. Then the joke started going around about how "we've got a guy for that" and "we know a girl for this" so I posted my list and there was some interest in it as a resource and I've continued building it. Now its grown to 100 apes and includes several sections. It is way for me to recognize apes who regularly contribute to the community and most of all, its fun. Let me also say that every ape out there is important no matter how often they post or how low-quality of a meme they create or even just the ninja apes that are out there lurking, your just being here is awesome and you make this place amazing.
NOMINATING: I want to be as inclusive as possible without the list melting into nonsense categories and no longer being useful. Reach out to me if you see an ape that is doing something noteworthy out there and I will get them added. I don't want to be the gatekeeper to this list, let's grow it to 200! There aren't any serious qualifications to it other than I am not including mods and I'm hoping that each user is doing 'that thing' on a semi-regular basis. Please help with genders and titles!
NOTE: If any ape on this list is uncomfortable being listed here please reach out and I will promptly remove your title and user name.
FUD WARNING: Last time I posted this I had some apes spreading FUD with a capital F for Fear. The HFs have better lists created in Tableau so no I'm n
... keep reading on reddit ➡There hasn't been a single post this year!
(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)
Nothing, it just waved
Bob
So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."
Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.
Just to clarify, 12345678
Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...
Notices there's only 2;
Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."
I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.
I was just sitting there doing nothing.
“BOOM”?!
"That's what they're fighting about."
