There will be point in the future when Canada will take over the world.
And then you will all be sorry.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ May 01 2021
Going up in smoke
π︎ 216
π
︎ Feb 19 2021
I saw some cows in the field smoking a joint and playing poker.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Feb 26 2021
Absolutely NO smoking in this establishment
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 28 2021
4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn't have a cigarette lighter.
So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter.
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Sep 26 2020
A person asked a Muslim scholar of its allowed to smoke marijuana in his country?
He replied: only gays get stoned here
π︎ 2
π
︎ Mar 20 2021
Don't know if this was posted here before
π︎ 6k
π
︎ May 10 2021
I tried smoking pot once.
π︎ 36
π
︎ Mar 24 2021
My boyfriend told me as I walked in βhey donβt be alarmed but the toilet is smokingβ. Concerned, I walked into the bathroom and found this:
π︎ 78
π
︎ Sep 01 2020
Doctor to patient do you smoke?
Patient: yes.
Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?
Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards.
That's right. The steaks were pretty high.
π︎ 56
π
︎ Feb 21 2021
In which part of Canada are you not allowed to do anything?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 14 2021
How much of Northern Canada is habitable?
π︎ 4
π
︎ May 14 2021
What has two butts and kills people?
π︎ 4k
π
︎ May 13 2021
what do you call a weed smoking midget?
π︎ 10
π
︎ Mar 16 2021
What do you call a family that smokes weed together?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Apr 01 2021
What is Canadaβs national board game?
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 05 2021
My buddy was promoted to quality inspector for the Canada Goose Jacket Company. He doesn't like it very much though...
...lately, he's been feeling down.
π︎ 238
π
︎ Mar 02 2021
Pride and joy
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Apr 25 2021
What did one smoking pipe say to the other smoking pipe?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Mar 09 2021
Why doesn't Santa smoke?
Because it's bad for his elf.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Apr 04 2021
I had a friend who smoked weed on Mount Everest.
He told me he was really high.
π︎ 110
π
︎ Jan 31 2021
There are 3 men on a boat.
Each has a cigarette, but nothing to light it with.
So one man throws his cigarette into the water, and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ May 13 2021
What kind of batteries do they use in Canada?
π︎ 124
π
︎ Oct 07 2020
In surgery my doctor said, "So what do we have here?" I replied that I broke my arm in 12 places."
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
π︎ 9k
π
︎ May 08 2021
One prostitute turned to another and asked Yolanda, do you smoke after sex?
Yolanda said, I don't know I never checked.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 20 2021
If a midget smoked weed...
....does he get high or medium ?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Mar 13 2021
I've been reading so many horrible things about drinking and smoking recently, that I've made a firm new year's resolution..
π︎ 227
π
︎ Jan 11 2021
In honor of Motherβs Day, Iβd just like to say,
βthank you for your cervix.β
π︎ 8k
π
︎ May 09 2021
I've started a boat building business in my attic...
...sails are going through the roof.
π︎ 7k
π
︎ May 13 2021
Guys, today was my first day in the navy and I felt so lost!
π︎ 10k
π
︎ May 05 2021
He gave the toy horses a home in his ___
π︎ 3k
π
︎ May 07 2021
What do you call a couch potato that smokes a lotta weed?
π︎ 31
π
︎ Feb 20 2021
My daughter got me a βCanada β sweater for Christmas... I asked why since we live in the USA?
βItβs aspirational β she said.
Ooooof...
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 26 2020
3 in 1
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Apr 30 2021
hey, do you smoke pot?
because weed be cute together
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 19 2021
Pasta la vista good chef
π︎ 1k
π
︎ May 01 2021
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?
Because it'll blow his cover
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Apr 27 2021
If you commit a 1st degree murder in Canada
is it a 34 degree murder in the US?
π︎ 507
π
︎ Aug 20 2020
I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and my ears started ringing
Didn't surprise me, considering how cold tinnitus.
(I'll see myself out)
π︎ 24
π
︎ Feb 19 2021
Why should you be worried if you see cows smoking marijuana?
Cause that's when the steaks are highest.
Edit: Well this is rare, I wasn't sure how well done this joke was. Thanks for the face palm.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ May 08 2020
Doctor to Patient do you smoke?
Patient: yes
Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?
Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.
π︎ 91
π
︎ Apr 21 2021
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing poker
That's right!! The steaks were pretty high.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Mar 04 2021
Some cows were caught smoking weed an playing poker.
Yes, the steaks were very high.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Feb 27 2021
A farmer noticed some cows smoking weed and playing cards
The steaks were getting pretty high
π︎ 52
π
︎ Jan 29 2021
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