There will be point in the future when Canada will take over the world.

And then you will all be sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Going up in smoke
πŸ‘︎ 216
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueDisciple
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
I saw some cows in the field smoking a joint and playing poker.

The steaks were high.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
Absolutely NO smoking in this establishment

No ifs, ands, or Butts.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jake2rich
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
🚨︎ report
4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn't have a cigarette lighter.

So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
A person asked a Muslim scholar of its allowed to smoke marijuana in his country?

He replied: only gays get stoned here

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2021
🚨︎ report
Don't know if this was posted here before
πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/choclite69
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried smoking pot once.

I choked on the handle.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2021
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend told me as I walked in β€œhey don’t be alarmed but the toilet is smoking”. Concerned, I walked into the bathroom and found this:
πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slebsta
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Doctor to patient do you smoke?

Patient: yes.

Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?

Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards.

That's right. The steaks were pretty high.

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
In which part of Canada are you not allowed to do anything?

Ban-ff.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
🚨︎ report
How much of Northern Canada is habitable?

Nunavut.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/redditmanagement_
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What has two butts and kills people?

An assassin

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/buttered_t0asties
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
what do you call a weed smoking midget?

medium

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pauu3r
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a family that smokes weed together?

Joint family.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
What is Canada’s national board game?

Sorry!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperGinger
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
My buddy was promoted to quality inspector for the Canada Goose Jacket Company. He doesn't like it very much though...

...lately, he's been feeling down.

πŸ‘︎ 238
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Pride and joy
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thehawkplays
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
🚨︎ report
What did one smoking pipe say to the other smoking pipe?

Don’t go ashtray

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rethinkr
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Why doesn't Santa smoke?

Because it's bad for his elf.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Snozzcumberbatch
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I had a friend who smoked weed on Mount Everest.

He told me he was really high.

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RedShirtCashion
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
There are 3 men on a boat.

Each has a cigarette, but nothing to light it with.

So one man throws his cigarette into the water, and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
What kind of batteries do they use in Canada?

Triple Eh

πŸ‘︎ 124
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jrgonz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
In surgery my doctor said, "So what do we have here?" I replied that I broke my arm in 12 places."

He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAzrael2013
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
🚨︎ report
One prostitute turned to another and asked Yolanda, do you smoke after sex?

Yolanda said, I don't know I never checked.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
🚨︎ report
If a midget smoked weed...

....does he get high or medium ?

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I've been reading so many horrible things about drinking and smoking recently, that I've made a firm new year's resolution..

..NO MORE READING !!

πŸ‘︎ 227
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
🚨︎ report
In honor of Mother’s Day, I’d just like to say,

β€œthank you for your cervix.”

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rusto_Dusto
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
🚨︎ report
I've started a boat building business in my attic...

...sails are going through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xholdsteadyx
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Guys, today was my first day in the navy and I felt so lost!

Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nikolai_G
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
He gave the toy horses a home in his ___
πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/7keletor
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a couch potato that smokes a lotta weed?

Fries

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boombotser
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
My daughter got me a β€œCanada β€œ sweater for Christmas... I asked why since we live in the USA?

β€œIt’s aspirational β€œ she said.

Ooooof...

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sleep_adict
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
🚨︎ report
3 in 1
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thehawkplays
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
🚨︎ report
hey, do you smoke pot?

because weed be cute together

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_Mechatronix
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Pasta la vista good chef
πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?

Because it'll blow his cover

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/p_tally
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
🚨︎ report
If you commit a 1st degree murder in Canada

is it a 34 degree murder in the US?

πŸ‘︎ 507
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FriezaAndHoushi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and my ears started ringing

Didn't surprise me, considering how cold tinnitus.

(I'll see myself out)

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thirteen_20
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Why should you be worried if you see cows smoking marijuana?

Cause that's when the steaks are highest.

Edit: Well this is rare, I wasn't sure how well done this joke was. Thanks for the face palm.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wileydan
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Doctor to Patient do you smoke?

Patient: yes

Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?

Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.

πŸ‘︎ 91
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing poker

That's right!! The steaks were pretty high.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Some cows were caught smoking weed an playing poker.

Yes, the steaks were very high.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2021
🚨︎ report
A farmer noticed some cows smoking weed and playing cards

The steaks were getting pretty high

πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yoru
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report

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