A yearly tradition, my family gets together and everyone rides in a wagon thru the city, saying "hello" to all people on the street...

It's our hey-ride.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
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Whatโ€™s a thiefโ€™s way of saying hello?

Knife to meetcha!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MisterMcCormick75
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 26 2019
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How do tiny Japanese dogs say hello?

Konichihuahua.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Mama_Bear15
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
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How do German Bakers say hello?

Gluten tag!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Elon_Muskmelon
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
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How does a Japanese baby say hello?

Konnichi WAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Nougat
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 53
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/howiewu0402
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
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I saw my ex girlfriend standing on the opposite side of the museum hall, and I was too self conscious to say hello.

There was so much history between us.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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My girlfriend has decided to repurpose our novelty cookie jar. Say hello to our Tea-Rex.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/vowelHeavy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
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How does bread say hello?

Glutentag

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CrispyNugget17
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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I yelled "hello" to my friend walking far from me. He didn't know whether to merely raise his hand or say "hello" back...

He wavered.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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How does a Chinese cowboy say hello....

Nรฎ hรขowdy.....

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/snakeoil_sales
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
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What do you call a Chihuahua that only knows how to say hello in japanese?

A konichiwahua

๐Ÿ‘︎ 88
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Erics5ej
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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Say hello Reddit to my cat Kelli. Spelled K E L L I, with one I.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BRIDISH1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 10 2018
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A man walk into a bar and says "Hello it's me!"

But that wasn't him

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๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 03 2019
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What kind of computer says hello

Adell

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Moviebuff182
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
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How do oceans say hello?

It waves.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Blou_Aap
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 07 2019
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Say hello to my . . . . MEME-AW
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ShebanotDoge
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 11 2018
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"Say hello to vitamin D-licious and Calci-yum" i.reddituploads.com/e5eb4โ€ฆ
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/KuKomPU
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 07 2016
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How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?

Konnichihuahua.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/spinner899
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 07 2016
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Request for help remembering a joke

Hello,

I am requesting help with remembering a joke. Posts of this type did not seem to be against the subreddit's rules, but if I am in error, please let me know and delete my post.

Anyway, here is what I remember of the joke:

It is movie themed and it says something like this: "There should be a post-apocalyptic zombie movie with a romantic comedy element. Then we would have the world's first rom-com-zom-dom-bomb." The only thing is that I forget what the "dom" was supposed to mean and whether or not there is more to this joke, either in the set-up or the punchline. I googled it to no avail. Any help is appreciated.

Thank you

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ontoforever
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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How do plants say hello ?

Aloe !

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/music_snobbbb
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 14 2018
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On a sign outside my local vet : How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?

Konichihuahua!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Chucknorris1975
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 09 2017
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How do you say hello to a muscular person?

Buffalo

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Kardight
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2017
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Why did the computer say hello?

Because it was A Dell

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/skippy_tha_kangaroo
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 30 2016
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Dad Jokes

It was a brisk Saturday morning when Gerald arrived at โ€œThe Cafรฉ,โ€ a hip coffee shop right down the street. Wearing his large, burly black coat, he stared hesitantly at his watch. Thick glasses adorned his bright blue eyes, his gaze like starlight in a clear night sky. He was waiting, intently twiddling his thumbs. After a buzz of his phone, the message from Dad popped up: โ€œParking now, be there in 5.โ€

โ€œDad,โ€ he whispered under his breath, swiping the message away to once again reveal the image on his lock-screen: a hazy picture of an ultrasound.

Gerald had not spoken to his father for three years. They had had a falling out, over which he did not remember. To him it was a competition of who could wait the longest without calling or sending a text. Who could wait the longest: him without a father, or his father without a son? The idea of friction in the relationship hurt like a thorn; piercing his soul more and more everyday. Until recently, out of the blue, โ€œDadโ€ popped up on his phone. The rest is history. The rest leads to that Saturday morning, at The Cafรฉ.

Bang! A car door rang out not too far from where Gerald stood. Gerald saw him. His father wore his tweed jacket like a coat of armor. His strut was now weaker than before they stopped talking; a weakness evident in his cane which supported every right step. His shortly trimmed white beard juxtaposed against his uncut, curly grey hair gave him the image of a wise wizard from a fairytale. He used to be that figure to Gerald, yet instead of a nice ancient being acting like a stone to keep him grounded, Gerald had felt as though his father was a rock pulling him deeper and deeper into a sea of monotony. Holding him back from his true potential. Maybe that was why he left? He still did not know.

โ€œHello, son,โ€ came the withered voice Gerald had sook for so long, yet now that it had arrived wanted to avoid. โ€œI canโ€™t believe itโ€™s been so long!โ€

โ€œYeah,โ€ said Gerald, allowing a smile to grace his face. โ€œToo long!โ€

Then they hugged, signifying a change in their relationship. Gerald had hoped something could happen to bring them closer together. He did not want to go on wondering what could have been. The regret and sadness weighed him down. Before starting a new family, Gerald wanted to be reacquainted with his own.

After finding their table and sitting down, the two began to discuss life. It was like old friends catching up after a long break. Although it took some time, Gerald began to warm u

... keep reading on reddit โžก

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sullyrr
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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How did the spaghetti say hello to the rigatoni?

Que Pasta?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NoDragonsPlz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 23 2016
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Whenever I walk out to my backyard pond

My fish first pop out to say hello, but then quickly retreat to cover. Then they'll tease like they're coming out again, but then they'll shy away.

What makes them act so coy!?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/FightMilkLLC
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
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Why did Adele cross the road?

To say hello from the other side

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/confused-avocado72
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
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Joke I came up with today

So this surgeon always posts pictures of the masks he wears during his surgery on Instagram. He does this every single time he has a surgery, and his nurses can never understand why. Eventually, he garners a massive following on Instagram. So, he goes into his supervisor's room, and he says, "Hello, it's a pleasure to see you". The supervisor says, "To what do I owe the pleasure?" The surgeon says, "Well, my Instagram business is really taking off. I think it would be better for me to quit being a surgeon and focus on Instagram full time". The supervisor thinks he's a little crazy but decides to let him do what he wants. The former surgeon now goes and buys as many masks as he can to sustain his Instagram account. Eventually, he becomes so wealthy that he is able to buy all these lavish things and not have to worry about economic failure. However, one day, he decides to begin posting pictures of medical needles on his Instagram account instead of masks at about the same time that he gets a horrible sickness that is almost always fatal. Because he posts pictures of masks now, his account begins failing, and even though he tries to save it, he's unable. He no longer has any money to treat the illness and is on his deathbed. His entire family is surrounding him, and his father leans in to hug him. As this happens, the ex-surgeon says in a weak voice, "Dad, where did I go wrong?" The dad, with tears in his eyes, seeing what his son has been reduced to and sadly knowing his dear son's death is imminent says, "You post syringe, you lose subscriber"

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TwoPolesGaming
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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How does the little person chef say hello?

with a microwave!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/GimpyNip
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 27 2015
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How does a fat German say "Hello"?

Gluten Tag!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Hydramanium
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
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How does the french skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Tallstax640
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
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I was at the museum and I saw my ex girlfriend across the hall, but was too self conscious to say hello.

There was too much history between us.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 10 2020
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/notdadbot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/notdadbot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/notdadbot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/notdadbot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
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How does a French skeleton say hello?

Bone-jour.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/notdadbot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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How does German bread say hello?

Gluten tag!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/aevyian
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
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how does a japanese chihuahua say hello?

Konichihuahua

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dnk710
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 10 2016
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How does a chihuahua say hello?

Konichihuahua

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/_BlNG_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 09 2016
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How do German wheatfarmers say hello?

Gluten tag

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๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 18 2014
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