Samantha Sang Puns

Emotion was written by Barry Gibb and Robin Gibb

💠 Listen to Samantha Sang's original here

💠 Listen to Destiny's Child's cover here

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love you till i die - baccara

do you need my love - weyes blood

se telefonando - mina

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Before they were lines of code they were the uber rich, the experts without experience or expertise, the emperors with the magic clothing that everyone claimed was the most beautiful clothing they had ever seen, the leaders who came from outside of the system to rebuild it in a glorious new manner. The soothsayers with crystal balls of code and silicon shifting through the data streams for the correlations and connections that will create the future desires and fulfillments before the global and individual consciousness recognizes the market driven synchronicity of the repo man. The Weavers of cultural tales and myths from flax into gold and perpetual royalties free from the commons but not the tragedy. - u/drsoftware, History of the Terran Afterlife Wars

Daxin stood up, the streams of code running out of his fist and pooling on the floor before they dissolved into nothingness. Code dripped off the whitish blade in his other fist.

"We've got to get back," he said, turning around.

A puff of purplish smoke unwound from a point waist high in the middle of the room. It thickened, then cleared to show Bellona standing still. She was wearing white gauze wrapped around her and the smoke still swirling around her feet.

"Oh, boy," Peter said.

"Stay thine hand," she said, her voice a burbling choir. "Our footsteps are imprinted in the acrid brimstone of failure on this task," she continued.

Daxin clenched his fist. "I have to..."

"Nay, we, the First Apostles, failed and our failure is written in burning warsteel across the heavens," Bellona gurgled. She pointed at Dambree, who had turned to stare at the living dead woman. "His fate, our fates, all of the fates of those who dwell in the stars above, lay with the children."

"But," Daxin started to protest.

"Do you intend on doing the same thing expecting a different outcome, brother?" Menhit asked softly, stepping forward and putting her hand on Daxin's bicep. "Our war is here, in the afterlife, as relics of the past," she turned and stared at Dambree. "Run for the mat-trans, child. The Digital Omnimessiah needs you."

Dambree nodded, grabbing the grav-ski mask as she moved quickly across the room.

Menhit looke

Hey y'all; In my never-ending journey of trying to choose artists, I've come across quite a few artists that I like. I decided to put them in a list by location, and figured I'd share it in case anyone is trying to find new artists in their area or just look at cool art. A few disclaimers, I live in the Northeast US, so it is somewhat concentrated in that region. Obviously this is only a small handful of artists of those out there, and there's no way I could get them all. I also am not claiming these these are the only good artists in these places, just the ones I've come across and like personally. Lastly, I split the US up into four sections, but this isn't /r/mapporncirclejerk so try to refrain from critiquing what the Midwest is. I hope to keep growing this list so feel free to dm artists that I've missed, I feel like this could be a helpful resource for the sub. ( I marked a few of my favorites with *). Edit: Sorry if its showing up a bit messy for mobile, it was formatted for desktop.

#United States (Northeast)

##Massachusetts

Boston:
Danny Reis, Ghost in the Machine Tattoo (Also tattoos in Rhode Island) - [Insta] (https://www.instagram.com/dannyreistattoo/)
Nicholas Adam, Riverside Tattoo - Insta
Brian Hemming, Ghost in the Machine Tattoo - Insta Andy Reach, Redemption Tattoo - Insta

Salem:
Barron, North Shore Tattoo Company - Insta
Ricky Mo, Private Studio - Insta
Kyle Mackenzie, North Street Tattoo - Insta
Joe Mallard, North Street Tattoo - Insta

New Bedford:
Thomas Butts, Times Tattoo - Insta

##New York
New York City:
Chris Fernandez, Kings Avenue Tattoo - Insta
John Lemon, Bound for Glory Tattoo - Insta
Phil DeAngulo (MidwestPhil), Memorial Tattoo - Insta
Bert Krak, Smith Street Tattoo Parlor - Insta
Henbohenning, Good Luck NYC - [Insta](https://www.instagram.com/henb

Unedited; questionable language

Previously: Catfighting. Pole-dancing. Lacey is quite possibly insane, and kind of so is Rodeo.

We enter just after Kristia and Dallas have been eliminated. Things in the house are getting crazy, which I'm sure comes as a great surprise. Brandi C. is sad that her best friend Kristia was eliminated, so opts to drown her sorrows in some booze. Amidst all the revelry, Rodeo looks kind of serious. Normally, she'd be up on the pole with the rest of them, but she says she all of a sudden realized that she missed her son. Kids are such the buzzkill. She removes herself from the crowd, and Lacey, seeing this mini-breakdown as an opportunity to advance her own nefarious advancement, goes to get Bret. We cut to Bret holding a weeping and wailing Rodeo in the bathroom. Bret tells us that he consoled her and also shared how much he missed his girls. It made him feel closer to Rodeo, but at the same time he wonders how long she's going to last in the house of rock. I bet Tiffany never even would have thought about her kid once! Buck up, Rodeo.

Meanwhile, Brandi C. is wasted, and standing in the yard in her underwear. I mean, not that she doesn't do that while she's sober, but still. Jes calls her "drunkarooski," which I find hilarious. Brandi C. doesn't care to talk to the other girls now that Kristia's gone; she's going to focus her attentions on Bret. She waits outside the B.A.M.B. room until Big John tells her that it's not going to happen tonight. Her whining has no effect on the big man, and she starts crying. To ease the pain of missing her son, I think Rodeo should just hang around Brandi C., who often seems like she's seven.

The next morning, the girls are called to attention by the dulcet tones of Bret's harmonica. That's legendary harp player Bret "One-Eyed Snake Dickey Stabone Male Pattern Baldness Suffering Sugar Shock Monkey Foot" Michaels to you. Since music is the most important thing in Bret's life -- which makes one wonder why he insists on committing crimes in its name year after year -- he wants his special lady to be creative as well. For today's challenge, the girls will have the opportunity, in teams of two, to write lyrics to one of two songs from his solo album, and then perform them. One is a hard, uptempo rock song, and one is a ballad. I would choose the latter, and entitle it "Every Nose Has Its Corn," about the temptation and dangers of inserting niblets in questionable orifices. The overarching theme th

Is anyone excited for where this is going, cause I am, as of today (1/5/2022) I am in the process of writing chapter 11, so updates will probably slow down after these posts, feel free to give me a follow so as to get notified when new chapters are released, also from here on out any comments or suggestions that you make will have a much greater influence on my writing as I am now caught up. Anyways, Please Enjoy

+ Prologue + Previous + Next +

_____________________________

Chapter 10

The New Crew

"That's close enough, stay where you are." Neirdith shouted to another small group of disarmed pirates that had entered the adjoining cargo room with their hands raised. There were now eleven such prisoners in the cargo bay, and they all looked like they had experienced something truly horrid. There was one young man in particular that looked especially haggard, sitting alone with his face in his hands. They seemed to weep silently, wondering what could have broken them, she turned her focus back to the main group. None of them had any visible weapons but that didn't stop her from keeping a very close eye on them. You never knew what someone would do if they thought there was nothing to lose. Radioing to Gloom she asked “Gloom, what is the status of the prisoners? Where is Skorr?”

After a slight delay Gloom’s voice could be heard clearly through her assistant “Skorr is at the final room now, it has two occupants, there is a possibility of an incident so I don't want to interrupt them. But the rest of the prisoners are headed back to your location, I have them marked so you should be able to differentiate them from the pirates using your HUD in your assistant.”

Judging that Gloom was done talking by their continued silence, Neirdith raised her assistant and activated the HUD using it to see the marks that Gloom had placed on the room's occupants, all but one where marked orange, with the distraught young man being marked in yellow. As she was looking at them she heard movement at the entranceway and presently a group of rather bedraggled people wandered in and immediately flinched away from the pirates. Seeing that they were al

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

Mentos

(I will see myself out)

The doctor says it terminal.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!