Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor!
What’s a rock group of 4 people in which nobody sings?
I teared up when my son handed me a rock.
Sorry, I guess I’m just a little sedimental.
Chris Rock just declined the invite to host 2023 Academy Awards.
That's a real shame, last time he hosted it absolutely slapped
Why is Will Smith and Chris Rock not having turkey this Christmas?
Because they’ve got beef.
Thank you for making the energy drink for my pet rock.
A couple I know who loved rock climbing together just filed for divorce.
In the end, they repelled each other.
My wife got handsy last night and said I was rock hard
I suggested we not take it for granite.
My wife is my rock.
Not only is she always there for me, but she looks just like Dwayne Johnson.
The company said they only employ rock stars.
So when they booked me for corporate travel, I trashed the hotel room.
If you were 8 when “rock lobster” came out…
What was the dentist’s favourite progressive rock band of all time?
The Rock used to be the best wrestler in the world….
… then along came a wrestler called The Paper
After I lost my forefinger in an accident, every time I play rock paper scissors
What happened to the king after he lost the rock throwing contest?
80s rock
I have been trying to give my kids a well rounded musical background. In the car with my daughter today listening to the radio and whitesnake came on. I said hey you know this song, it's whitesnake, sing it! She replied "no want to sing dada" So I said... Here I go again on my own
Who is the most famous rock musician in Middle Earth?
I dropped a rock from a 20 story building
I guess rock beats paper after all
What’s a four man rock group that doesn’t have anyone singing in it?
I crouch down, tuck my head between my knees, I put my arms over my head and I rock forwards.
When you thought you’ve just about heard all the Will Smith and Chris Rock jokes already, I present you with this one
Did you hear about a rock that decided not to be indecisive anymore…
What’s on Chris Rock’s Face?
When Ben Affleck played Batman he was called Batfleck. When Pattinson played Batman he was called Battinson. What would The Rock be called if he played the Batman ?
What did the rock say to the brave man?
You may be bold, but I am boulder.
What was the most energy efficient rock band of the '70s?
A father gives his son a rock in a bag
The son says "thanks for the Baghdad."
What do you call a rock band that only plays on V shaped guitars?
V guitarians.
.
The bass player from Norwegian band "Black Debbath" told that joke at a show I was at last night.
I don’t know if Chris Rock will join us in the slapping competition…
These people are really rockin’ these rock puns.
I told my friend that I was going to run away and marry a rock melon. He just said
Every neighborhood that I have lived in has always had a terrible rock band in it. It seems like they follow me...
They are always 3 Doors Down from my house.
Every time my wife looks at me in the eyes, I get rock hard
God, I hate being married to a gorgon
So, a Circus Rock Eater was asking his dad for advice on where to take his date out to eat.
His dad said, "It doesn't really matter, just don't take her for granite."
Chris Rock apologized and took the joke back...
Now it's a receding hair line.
I want to open a pub for dads for are into old rock music and dad jokes
I will call it “The house of the rising pun”.
I went to the minerals section of the natural history museum and saw a good looking rock.
It was pretty gneiss.
(I made basically this joke on a date this weekend at this museum, it took her a bit to get it but she appreciated it).
What do you call a brave rock?
If you were 8 when rock lobster came out…
I had a pet rock.
But I had to put it down.
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