What do you call someone who steals noodles from the rich and gives them to the poor?

Ramen Hood

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drinkbeernaked
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2022
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Robin Hood used to steal from the rich and give to the poor.

He had to retire when he robbed King Richard, but couldn't find King Poorard to give him the money.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sassaphras
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2022
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What is the difference between a poor man on a bicycle and a rich man on a unicycle?

Attire

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PollitoDLC
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2021
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Why did the rich get richer and the poor get poorer in ancient Egypt?

Because it was all just a 'Pyramid Scheme' :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LurG1975
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2021
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Why would a poor person never date a rich person?

Because they would be income-patible.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2021
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It doesn’t matter if you’re tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor, at the end of the day....

It’s night

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VaughnSD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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What's considered trashy if you're poor, but classy if you're rich.

Not raising your child

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
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In the past, the poor had horses and the rich had cars. Now, the poor have cars and only the rich have horses.

Oh how the stables have turned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/phrygianhalfcad
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
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If Robin Hood stole from the poor and gave to the rich, then he'd be Robbin' The Hood.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KyuubiBlade
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
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What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a richly dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SeaDawger
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2021
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100 years ago everyone owned a horse…

And only the rich had cars.

Now everyone has cars, and only the rich have horses.

The stables have turned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Helpfulfriend96
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2021
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There was this tramp…

One cold winter's morning he was walking along a country road, when he heard a cry for help from a nearby lake.

He turned to see a little girl struggling in the broken ice in the middle of the lake. She'd been skating and had fallen into the icy water. Without a moment's hesitation the tramp ran onto the ice and slipped and slided over to the little girl. He managed to pull her out without breaking the ice further and he carried her back to the road.

He took off his coat and wrapped the little girl in it and began looking for a car to flag down. A few moments later a huge chauffeur-driven limo pulled up, and who stepped out but the little girl's father - the mayor of the nearby town and a multi-millionaire.

"How can I ever thank you sir?" says the father after putting his daughterinto the warmth of the limo.

"Just name your price - I'm a wealthy man."

"Ahem, well ..." stammered the tramp "...eh I'm a little short of cash, perhaps you could help me out"

"Certainly" says the girl's father and he pulls out his wallet.

"Oh dear" says the father, "I don't carry much cash with me, I only have ten dollars - but come home with me and I'll get more from the safe"

"No! No!" says the tramp, "Why ten dollars is more money than I've seen in my whole life - that will be plenty".

"Well, if you insist" says the father - "now what will you do with your money?"

"Oh that's easy" says the tramp "I've not had a rest in 20 years. I think I'll buy myself a holiday"

"Well good luck" says the father, and he gets into the car and signals his chauffeur to drive home.

"Ten Dollars" thinks the tramp, "I'm rich! I'm rich!", and off he goes to the town, to buy himself a holiday.

He finds a travel agent, walks in - much to the disgust of the staff - and goes up to the desk.

"I'll have one holiday please!"

"Ahem, which holiday would sir like" asked the girl at the desk, forcing a smile.

"Oh, any holiday I don't mind" replied the tramp.

"Well how much money does sir have to spend on sir's holiday?"

"Oh lots - anything up to ten dollars"

"TEN DOLLARS!! You'll never get a holiday for ten dollars" says the girl incredulously.

"Oh dear" said the tramp, "and I was so looking forward to a holiday - I'll probably never get another chance - isn't there anything you can do?"

"Well I don't think so sir, but hold on and I'll check"

The girl goes into the back of the shop, and searches in the deepest, dustiest filing drawers she can find. There - to her amazement -

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FancyAlligator
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2022
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A friend of mine sent me this.

Qso there's a far-off place that consists of a perfectly triangular lake surrounded by land, with three kingdoms on the three sides of the lake, the first kingdom is rich and powerful, filled with wealthy. prosperous people, the second kingdom is more humble, but has its fair share of wealth and power, too. the third kingdom is struggling and poor, and barely has an army

the kingdoms eventually go to war over control of the lake, as it's a valuable resource to have, the first kingdom sends 100 of their finest knights, clad in the best armor and each with their own personal squire the second kingdom sends 50 of their knights, with fine leather armor and a few dozen squires of their own. the third kingdom sends their one and only knight, an elderly warrior who has long since passed his prime, with his own personal squire

the night before the big battle, the knights in the first kingdom drink and make merry, partying into the late hours of the night the knights in the second kingdom aren't as well off, but have their own supply of grog and also drink late into the night.

in the third camp, the faithful squire gets a rope and slings it over the branch of a tall tree, making a noose, and hangs a pot from it, he fills the pot with stew and has a humble dinner with the old knight.

the next morning the knights in the first two kingdoms are hung over and unable to fight, while the knight in the third kingdom is old and weary, unable to get up. in place of the knights, the squires from all three kingdoms go and fight the battle lasts long into the night, but by the time the dust settled, only one squire was left standing - the squire from the third kingdom.

and it just goes to show you that the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grim08011112
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2022
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What tea do rich people buy?

Property

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chichard1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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This one gave me a good chuckle
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dr_Emmet_Brown
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2020
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Now stop horsing around.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/elarandra
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2019
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Old Robinhood

In a village just outside Sherwood Forest lived Old Robinhood, he had lived a very exciting life with his band of merry men, and his cause of stealing from the rich and giving to the poor and had a fantastic time doing it. He even had a sign outside his door that said, Robinhood, Bandit - but somehow the law never seemed to have noticed and he had lived in plain sight, doing good deeds, giving away money anonymously and living for the cause.

But now age had started to catch up and not being as nimble as he once was close escapes had started to get uncomfortably close. So he decided to retire and hand over the leadership of his band to his son.

So, Robin called his son over to him and said, β€˜Son, I want you to take over from me as leader of the merry men. Steal and pillage all you want, but never forget the cause - we only take from the rich to give to the poor’.

β€˜Father, I will do as you say’ said Robin’s son whose name was Robinson, β€˜but tell me one thing, why do you stay anonymous when giving money away?

Why not let people know of your good deeds - you have a sign outside that says bandit and you’ve never been caught, why not add the cause to the sign and say β€˜Robinhood, Bandit, steals from the rich to give to the poor’?

β€˜Fool, screamed Robin, if you put the cause over the sign then you will get caught’

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yakapuka11
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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The sheriff of Nottingham and his son were talking about robin hood

His son asked if he really stole from the rich and gave to the poor the sheriff told his son he does and his son asked "would he steal from us too?" And the sheriff replied "He Sherwood son"

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
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While driving my mom on Mother's Day

Context to the story: My mom is getting some work done in her backyard. Trees are being removed and they are digging to put an in ground pool in.

Story: Mom and I are driving back from an outing for Mother's Day. We are talking about the back yard and the work getting done.

Mom: When the pool gets put in I'll be dirt poor.

Me: But right now you're dirt rich!

Mom:look of disappointment

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πŸ‘€︎ u/balmung5000
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2016
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My brother, my dad and I were watching a volleyball game...

...And one of the player's name is "Miskin" (Polish setter for Jasztrebski-Wegiel, a very well known club in Poland and Europe). Us being Indonesian, the word "miskin" means "poor" as in not having money.

So during the whole game my dad would say stuff like:

  • "How come does he play in a prestigious club and still end up being poor?"

  • "Maybe if he gets his paycheck they will finally write "Rich" ("Kaya" in Indonesian) on his jersey."

And other phrases I managed to forget.

When he says them, my mom who isn't watching, would stop whatever she was doing to raise her head to stare into the emptiness and shake her head.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Starguy310
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2014
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What do you call a guy who steals noodles from the rich to give to the poor?

Ramen Hood.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cen-texan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2022
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Don’t worry if you’re tall or skinny or rich or poor. And the end of the day...

It’s night.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueVogueDino
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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Back then, only rich people had cars and poor people had horses. Now, only poor people have cars and rich people have horses.

Oh how the stables have turned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maxwelld22614
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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Funny how in the past everyone owned horses and only the rich owned cars, and now everyone has cars and only the rich have horses...

My how the stables have turned.

Edit: Wow guys, thanks for all the love!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zthazel
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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The Three Kingdoms

so there’s a far-off place that consists of a perfectly triangular lake surrounded by land, with three kingdoms on the three sides of the lake. the first kingdom is rich and powerful, filled with wealthy, prosperous people. the second kingdom is more humble, but has its fair share of wealth and power, too. the third kingdom is struggling and poor, and barely has an army.

the kingdoms eventually go to war over control of the lake, as it’s a valuable resource to have. the first kingdom sends 100 of their finest knights, clad in the best armor and each with their own personal squire. the second kingdom sends 50 of their knights, with fine leather armor and a few dozen squires of their own. the third kingdom sends their one and only knight, an elderly warrior who has long since passed his prime, with his own personal squire.

the night before the big battle, the knights in the first kingdom drink and make merry, partying into the late hours of the night. the knights in the second kingdom aren’t as well off, but have their own supply of grog and also drink late into the night.

in the third camp, the faithful squire gets a rope and slings it over the branch of a tall tree, making a noose, and hangs a pot from it. he fills the pot with stew and has a humble dinner with the old knight.

the next morning, the knights in the first two kingdoms are hung over and unable to fight, while the knight in the third kingdom is old and weary, unable to get up. in place of the knights, the squires from all three kingdoms go and fight. the battle lasts long into the night, but by the time the dust settled, only one squire was left standing - the squire from the third kingdom.

and it just goes to show you that the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sirmonkey95
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2015
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