It's pastor bedtime
....that she's started getting a tan off the frigging fridge light.
Because communication is the key.
Because communication is key
Edit: it's from here, so please give the op credit
I felt your presents!
Can someone help me open our liqour cabinet?
It's a cautionary tail
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
This woman is driving to the shops, She stops, gets out of her car, and goes to buy a newspaper.
When she gets back to her car, she realises that she has locked herself out of the car, and the keys are still inside !
She was just starting to panic, when an army truck pulls up, and asks her is she has a problem. She explains that she's locked her keys inside, and can't get in to continue her journey.
One of the squaddies then jumps down from the truck, and start rubbing his leg against the side of the car, and after a few seconds - ping - the door is open !!
She is amazed at this, and asks the squaddie how he did it.
He said,
. . . . . . . . . . . . .
"It's because I'm wearing my khaki trousers"
I was like, well damn.
I thought to myself, "I can't turn that down!"
Because 10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too..
Edit: thank you for awards, I have never gotten one before. I apologize that this is a repost, I did see it on TikTok and thought that it was cute and wanted to share. In the future I will check the sub for similar content before I post anything.
A small price toupee.
Carlos
K9P
but it's actually more sluggish..
..a duel meaning.
Ian
Me: “Brochure”
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
But now I stand corrected.
Next, I got one on my thoracic that said "4"
Then, I got one on my lumbar that said "3"
After that, I got one on my Sacrum that said 2"
And now, I'm getting one on my Coccyx that says "1"
It's the spinal countdown.
He thought homes were built, not born.
Anna 1
Anna 2
Anna 1,2,3,4
He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."
"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."
So they did.
Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.
And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.
Who buys gummy worms hoping they’d taste as close to real worms as possible?
Big deal. I have had a Canon printer for years.
Real Stupid
More precisely, a Finnish Hymn.
I hear they're gonna give him a really tough sentence.
Crows mostly drank alone.
That's when I realised I was playing the Bee side.
Labracadabrador
A meanderthal.
I wish I could post a picture here, but it says, "Dad Jokes are how eye roll."
It's a meta-Dad joke. I'm so proud of her!
the vaccum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years...
Because communication is the key.
Communication is key
