This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 67%. (I'm a bot)

> A mass protest erupted on the fields of the Fairview Race Yard in Port Elizabeth on Thursday.

> One horse was reportedly killed and others injured when disgruntled former employees stormed the grounds.

> One horse has been killed and others have been wounded during a protest by former Fairview racecourse workers over alleged Unemployment Insurance Fund non-payment.

> In a video of the protest, which has been circulating on social media, a large group of people can be seen entering the racecourse and running toward the horse sheds.

> According to a statement by the International Racing Club, owners of many of the horses at Fairview Race Yard, workers who were fired for standing in solidarity with a fellow employee who stabbed a horse, protested on the grounds and "Chaos" erupted.

> "She said all the racehorses were accounted for and the injured ones were being treated by the Port Elizabeth Animal Anti-Cruelty League."At this stage, the exact reason for the protest and subsequent death, injury and release of the horses is not known.

Summary Source | FAQ | Feedback | Top keywords: horse^#1 protest^#2 Race^#3 Fairview^#4 Yard^#5

Post found in /r/worldnews.

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Fucking Athers. He goes and writes his little column and suddenly everyone remembers there's a class issue in English cricket and pre-empts what I've been doing the last few days. Bastard. Does mean I don't have to write much of an introduction, I guess.

Before I go any further I'd like to remind non-Brits that a public school is not a state school. It is an older, fancier private school.

TL;DR County cricket and the Test side are pretty fucking posh. The ECB need to take the long view and help counties find purpose and recruits amongst the working and lower middle classes.

Part One - The Proletariat (Could) Rise

What is the make up of the current English side, then? Are we beset with scum class state schoolers or overrun by posh cunt private scholars? This was surprisingly easy to research, presumably because school cricket is quite important to some.

Taking the current squad call-ups from the 1st of November, as per Wikipedia, you get this.

51 call ups, 25 privately schooled, 23 state schooled, and the 3 remaining being Root, Jordan, and Archer, who all started at state schools and received scholarships to private schools later on.

Which raises an interesting question - which of the privately schooled lads actually went to private school on a scholarship? Does it matter?

For me...nah, not really. Might make a difference in attitude, perhaps, but as a country we are beset by questions of class and connections and a private education will do wonders for your ability to move up in the world, regardless of your original background.

The most interesting thing, for me, is how this current set of call ups mirrors the game of old - "working class" bowlers and "upper/middle class" batsmen. It raises an enticing prospect of a Scum XI vs Posh Cunt XI, maybe played instead of the Ashes - and one I think Scum XI would win at a canter. What they lack in top order bats (Bracey being their sole opener) they more than make up for in all rounders, middle order bats, and bowlers.

Give us this, ECB. Foment some class warfare and let the proletariat rise.

Part Two - What is the point of Derbyshire?

Since 1990 there have been 157 England Test caps*, from Nasser Hussain to Ollie Robinson. Before anyone gets pedantic, no, I'm not including Alan Jones.

There have long been allegations of bias from selectors, looking at the

My personal notes during today's second AMA (I missed the first one today, which announced this Raffle)

https://metadog.racing/dog-raffle/

--

Summary of the first AMA in the day:

IF YOU MISSED THE AMA COMPETITION ALERT🚨🚨🚨 will happen during UK time.

1000 tickets will be sold. Each ticket costs 50,000 DOG$ tokens and gets you a level 1 greyhound and a ticket for a draw. 10 people will win a shared race track between these 10 people. These will be going for 300-500k USD$ when the game is launched. could be HUGE MONEY ! you own a 10% stake in a 500k$ racetrack. Draw will happen once all 1000 tickets are sold. No limits on the amount of tickets that can be purchased

- Source: https://t.me/MetaRaceWorld/188841

My personal summary of the second AMA in the day:

--

Opportunity to sell 1000 Level 1 dogs in a raffle to have 10 people own part of a racecourse!

To share in a metacourse NFT is quite huge.

Compare to any metaverse which has land for a guild or farming, you see that they are sometimes as expensive as real property.

The racecourse is a really good deal!Whoever wins this, will become a racing kingpin, be able to call the shots, sit in the meeting with the big shots. You will be a major shareholder, and even might be the chairman!

At the end of the courses, you get to keep a part of the winnings, from the betting, from the entrance fees, from advertisement...

As a racer, even if you don't win, there is play to earn.A level 1 dog can be trained up to improve..!You can win or buy upgrades in limited properties (in limited quantities).You can do breeding.

And now the level 1 Dog is at the ground floor at 50K DOG$, it will not be cheaper.

You can even rent out the Dog to other players who can later on not afford it anymore because the price went up in the meantime.

And the floor will increase. But we (the community) get a lot of opportunities along the way.

The more active you are with your course, the more the course itself can be upgraded! The better the racing clubs perform, the more you go up.

And after you buy, you shill.Then new investors come in, we get green candles.Then we burn tokens, supply tightens. Tokens are staked, even tighter.Green

It’s 2035 and I’ve taken Wrexham from the Conference League to the Prem AND established myself as a Champions League team.

I’ve increased the club’s stature by at least 20folds yet the board still refuses to build a new stadium time and time again and stay in the 12500 capacity Racecourse Ground stadium. We literally sell out every game and it’s become frustrating.

Ryan Reynolds seems to be too busy filming Deadpool and joining the Avengers to grant me this obviously beneficial request. Are there any ways where I can possibly increase the odds of a new stadium?

I was beginning to think this would be mostly a copy-and-paste job but they threw us a real curveball this time.

https://preview.redd.it/6o6igqi9z0981.png?width=936&format=png&auto=webp&s=ce2a974d492b151b310dbaf71510d8155a79032f

Chukyo Racecourse, Turf, 1200m (SHORT), LEFT-turning, WINTER, SNOW, HEAVY

Modelled after: Takamatsunomiya Kinen

https://preview.redd.it/lxvt5hvaz0981.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5bc991c763e425491fbcbea553db331e78724744

ACCELERATION

Wowee, I feel like they went out of their way to make sure all the OP moves/builds/characters people have been complaining about couldn't have their day this time. Angling and Scheming is OUT. Let's Anabolic is OUT. Red Flame and Victory Shot are also no go. In short, anything that relies on "last spurt corner" will simply not activate at all. Anything that activates at the start of "final corner" will not last long enough to do anything useful. Skills that activate randomly during the final corner MAY be at least partially effective depending on where it procs.

BEST: 1) Straight Shot (直線一気) / Imminent Shadow (迫る影), BUT, big caveat here is the distance. I haven't done any testing on this but my gut feeling is the distance is too short for chasers to consistently make up ground in the Last Spurt. So even though their acceleration skill should activate as soon as they enter Last Spurt, it may be that runners and leaders are already too close to the goal line to catch. There's also the added difficulty of many of the strongest chasers in the game having terrible short distance ratings, requiring at least 10 stars in the short-distance trait and plenty of inheritance luck to bring them up to A, let alone S.

2. Plancha Ganador (プランチャ☆ガナドール) (OG El Condor Pasa's unique, for those not familiar with the skill name). If you can bring Condor's F rating in distance up to an A or S, she could do some serious work on this course. Might be even better if you could build her as a runner, but that's probably asking entirely too much from the three goddesses...

DARK HORSE: 1) Mountain Climber (登山家); a white acceleration skill anyone can learn but the uphill doesn't immediately coincide with the start of Last Spurt. My guess is this would be too late to be really effective.

GACHA: 1) Gust of Wind (一陣の風); a gold acceleration skill you can pick up from Tokai Teio SSR or Kashimoto Riko SSR. If this procs immediately upon entering the final straight line, it would be

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

New cases and information reported in the last 24 hours

• Local cases:
  • +55 new locally acquired cases:
    • 49 are linked to known outbreaks. 6 are under investigation
    • 25 have been in isolation for the entirety of their infectious period
• Overseas cases:
  • +2 new overseas cases recorded.
• 💉 Vaccinations:
  • +29,155 additional vaccinations were recorded for yesterday (only includes vaccinations being performed at Victoria's hospital immunisation hubs).
  • The 2 million vaccinations mark has been passed. A total of 2,022,513 doses have been administered at state vaccination hubs
  • Note 1: Phase 1b vaccinations are being performed by GPs and at respiratory clinics. These statistics will be reported by Federal government.
  • Note 2: We are reporting the increment since yesterday, which may differ from the actual number of vaccinations performed on the day.

DH Infographic 20 August 2021

• ℹ️Statements from the Premier:
  • 16 of August: Extended Melbourne lockdown to keep Victorians safe.
  • 11 of August: Extended Melbourne lockdown to keep Victorians safe.
  • 5 of August: Seven day lockdown to keep Victorians safe

Update: Extended lockdown

Strengthened extensions are in effect from 11:59pm Tuesday 16 August.

To see more information, visit COVIDSafe Settings.

⚠️ Case alerts – public exposure sites ⚠️

As the list is constantly being updated with new location and details, please always refer to the DH website for the most up to date and accurate information.

Exposure sites added in last 24 hours:

tw: implied transphobia, gender dysphoria, sexual assault

My grandma was never much like the other grandmothers I knew.

I knew what grandmas were supposed to be like. We've all seen them on TV - grey curly perms, wrinkles, big smiles, frumpy dresses, trays of warm baked goods. My grandma was never like that. First of all, I'd get a proper mouthful if I ever called her "Grandma" - that's what we all called her own mother, my great-grandmother. She was always Nan - not sure what the difference made as half the kids in England call their grandmothers "Nan" or "Nanna", but mine really insisted on it. And forget about the perms and freshly-baked cookies and all that. Nan had bleach-blonde hair, cropped and always highlighted with a bright rainbow colour. She credited her almost wrinkle-free face to nightly face masks of Vaseline, and would never be caught dead in what she called "old hag fashion". Nan was the only sixty-year-old in the village who wore neon suit jackets and pencil skirts to pick up the groceries. Lipstick was a necessity. She still had a job at the local bank, despite rumours of a fairly big fortune accrued from God-knows-where, and spent Friday nights at the pub with coworkers young enough to be her children. I never saw her without a ruby ring on her finger and studs along her ears. She even gardened in heels.

Gardening seems a bit more grandmotherly, doesn't it? But we'll get onto that a bit more later.

Growing up, I was never quite sure who I was supposed to be. I come from a small family: "Grandma", my great-grandma, conveniently addled with dementia whenever it came to anything she didn't fancy doing, but still capable of beating the lot of us at Mario Kart while downing a bottle of gin well into her eighties. Then there's Nan, whose highlights changed with the season and never seemed to notice the curt glances she got on the rare occasions she came to pick me up from school. Mum's always been more traditional - worked at the bakery during the week, and made the most delicious cupcakes just for the family at the weekend. My big sister Lola was well into punk rock before I'd even figured out all that screeching and banging was meant to be music. Even Nan raised an eyebrow at the spikes in her hair and around her neck.

Then there's me. Notice how there's no men in the family? Husbands seemed to die young in the Carter family, and only daughters were born - except for me, though none of us knew that at the time.

But enough ab

Do your worst!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

Hello all.

I tend not to post these previews on reddit due to the formatting, but seeing as the BHA aren't doing 48 hour decs, I am at a bit of a loose end. So here's a preview essay for the juvenile hurdle on Fontwell's Boxing Day card. The horse with the best chance is likely to go off the long odds-on favourite. Mercifully I am not a tipster; I write to inform rather than advise. So if you wanted the most comprehensive guide to a race most will pay little attention to, look no further.

For Monday, I plan on doing an essay for the Finale at Chepstow, the Introductory Juvenile at Kempton and, if I have the time, the Juvenile at Wetherby. Given how dense my workload will be tomorrow, I probably won't have the chance or wherewithal to post them on here. Nevertheless, my content does get posted through my twitter doo-dah.

https://twitter.com/HarchibaldS

Questions and feedback welcome either on here or through twitter. Cheers :)

######FONTWELL - 26th DECEMBER - PREVIEW

Apart from last season, a juvenile hurdle has been held at Fontwell each Boxing Day since 2013. With the winners having an average seasonal RPR of 121.36, it is generally an above average affair, although it seldom produces anything of note. 2016 winner Rainbow Dreamer would finish second in the Finesse while the next two winners, Aiguille Rouge and Westbrook Bertie, both placed in the Chatteris Fen. However, beyond a handful of horses finishing well beaten in the Fred Winter, that is the extent of the race's prowess. This year's edition is headed by a Gary Moore horse whose first two British outings have resulted in placings at Cheltenham. However, should he fail to perform then the contest would be an average one with good recent form thin on the ground. The circuit at Fontwell is a sharp, flat, left-handed one although due to the distance of juvenile contests and the propensity for the ground to get testing, the winning DIs of 1.39 mean, 1.00 median are within the lowest third of British and Irish venues. Its clear round rate of 95.05% is among the lowest in the country and drops to 90.86% for newcomers. The strike rate of odds on favourites, standing at 51.35%, is nine points below the national average, although this particular contest generally goes to one prominent in the market with the median SP being less than 2/1. The going is currently described as soft and plenty of rain is predicted before post time so although there are only six declared runners, none of whom are habi

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

You take away their little brooms

Or would that be too forward thinking?

New cases and information reported in the last 24 hours

• Local cases:
  • +65 new locally acquired cases:
    • 12 of the cases were in quarantine for their full infectious period
    • 21 are linked to the Greater Shepparton community outbreak.
    • 17 of those were discussed yesterday
    • 8 are linked to Al-Taqwa College
    • 8 are linked to the City of Hobsons Bay outbreak
    • 5 are linked to the MyCentre Child Care Broadmeadows outbreak (which has grown rapidly in just a matter of days)
    • 13 are linked to "general other outbreaks", including St Kilda and CS Square in Caroline Springs
    • 10 are not yet linked to known outbreaks
• Overseas cases:
  • +1 new overseas cases recorded.
• 💉 Vaccinations:
  • +26,291 additional vaccinations were recorded for yesterday (only includes vaccinations being performed at Victoria's hospital immunisation hubs).
  • Note 1: Phase 1b vaccinations are being performed by GPs and at respiratory clinics. These statistics will be reported by Federal government.
  • Note 2: We are reporting the increment since yesterday, which may differ from the actual number of vaccinations performed on the day.
• ℹ️Statements from the Premier:
  • 16 of August: Extended Melbourne lockdown to keep Victorians safe.
  • 11 of August: Extended Melbourne lockdown to keep Victorians safe.
  • 5 of August: Seven day lockdown to keep Victorians safe

Update: Extended lockdown

Strengthened extensions are in effect from 11:59pm Tuesday 16 August.

To see more information, visit COVIDSafe Settings.

⚠️ Case alerts – public exposure sites ⚠️

As the list is constantly being updated with new location and details, please always refer to the DH website for the most up to date and accurate information.

Exposure sites added in last 24 hours:

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

New cases and information reported in the last 24 hours

• Local cases:
  • +11 new locally acquired cases
  • The 11 new locally-acquired cases are all linked, and one has been in quarantine throughout their infectious period.
• Overseas cases:
  • +0 new overseas cases recorded.
• 💉 Vaccinations:
  • +17,188 additional vaccinations were recorded for yesterday (only includes vaccinations being performed at Victoria's hospital immunisation hubs).
  • Note 1: Phase 1b vaccinations are being performed by GPs and at respiratory clinics. These statistics will be reported by Federal government.
  • Note 2: We are reporting the increment since yesterday, which may differ from the actual number of vaccinations performed on the day.

DH Infographic 9 August 2021

• ℹ️Statements from the Premier:
  • 5 of August: Seven day lockdown to keep Victorians safe

Update: Seven Day Lockdown

Victoria entered a 7 day lockdown from 5th August 8pm. Current restrictions.

⚠️ Case alerts – public exposure sites ⚠️

As the list is constantly being updated with new location and details, please always refer to the DH website for the most up to date and accurate information.

Exposure sites added in last 24 hours:

New cases and information reported in the last 24 hours

• Local cases:
  • +11 new locally acquired cases
  • The 11 new locally-acquired cases are all linked to previously reported cases and have not been in quarantine throughout their infectious period.
• Overseas cases:
  • +2 new overseas cases recorded.
• 💉 Vaccinations:
  • +17,499 additional vaccinations were recorded for yesterday (only includes vaccinations being performed at Victoria's hospital immunisation hubs).
  • Note 1: Phase 1b vaccinations are being performed by GPs and at respiratory clinics. These statistics will be reported by Federal government.
  • Note 2: We are reporting the increment since yesterday, which may differ from the actual number of vaccinations performed on the day.

DH Infographic 8 August 2021

• ℹ️Statements from the Premier:
  • 5 of August: Seven day lockdown to keep Victorians safe

Update: Seven Day Lockdown

Victoria entered a 7 day lockdown from 5th August 8pm. Current restrictions.

⚠️ Case alerts – public exposure sites ⚠️

As the list is constantly being updated with new location and details, please always refer to the DH website for the most up to date and accurate information.

Exposure sites added in last 24 hours:

When I got home, they were still there.

It was about a weak back.