Pramod Shetty Puns

(Published: June 17, 2006)

He is an actor with a squeaky-clean image, often hailed as a devoted family man. When the family is not looking, though, he consumes hard drugs. Just like the actress who used to once come for a shoot only after a shot of cocaine. Quite like the happening couple in Bollywood who have been snorting coke to remain fresh for a while.

Ho-hum, so what else is new, they would say in Mumbai’s film industry. After all, the fact that the jet-setting crowd of Bollywood is into substance abuse is well known ? if you go by the sheer number of police cases that have been filed in recent times.

But the spotlight is on Mumbai again, sharpened by the furore that the Rahul Mahajan case has kicked up. Mahajan, son of the late BJP minister Pramod Mahajan, was released on bail on Wednesday in a case relating to the use of drugs. Another accused in the case ? Sahil Zaroo ? is known in Mumbai, though here he is referred to as Sahil Kashmiri. A regular at celebrity parties, he is the one people get in touch with when they are in need of drugs at short notice. And the police are said to be looking at people in Bollywood to whom Zaroo supplied drugs.

A top police officer believes that 80 per cent of Bollywood’s stars are into drugs. “Some are filmmakers and we have statements of some actors in some cases as well,” says the officer who holds that the police have been ordered not to speak to the press on the issue.

A source at the Narcotics Control Bureau in Mumbai who spoke on condition that he would not be identified adds that drug abuse is rampant in Bollywood and that it has gone up in the last 10 years. “A famous Bollywood action star, a famous singer who was a judge in the talent search programmes, a famous Bollywood star who has gained a lot of notoriety and who pumps iron and, of course, Fardeen Khan are those who have come under our surveillance.”

That’s not really surprising ? for the chequered history of Bollywood showcases the problem of drugs in use. First there was actor Sanjay Dutt, who confessed that he used drugs. In 2000, Ali, a drugpeddler, was arrested in New Delhi. His diary revealed a few names, including that of actress Manisha Koirala. A year later, actor Fardeen Khan was arrested along with a drug peddler, Naseer Abdul Kareem Khan.

In 2003, four Indians, including G.P. Sippy’s grandson Shaan Uttam Singh,were arrested and later released in Dubai after drugs were found in their car and their hotel room. In February, 2005

(Published: August 11, 1998)

Taekwondo may have helped, but it has still been a long road for Akshay Kumar, who famously started off as a waiter in Hong Kong. But when we caught up with him, we found him struggling back up to a peak he'd already climbed.

But this time, he's short of sympathy. Being the macho man he is, he'll deny a need for it. But, even professionally, the strokes an actor needs are many. And, now that he's only another actor seeking a comeback, he finds he's short of what he needs most. The gossip surrounding him, the dirty linen assiduously washed in public, hasn't helped any either.

There may have been other reasons he was looking spent and wasted at the shooting of Raftaar at Bhalla Bungalow, Bandra, for after Akshay had a small breather, he looks pretty fresh indeed. We remind ourselves that excessive imagination does a journalist no good. But still, we can't shake the feeling that the man is very tense and upset.

At least, his demeanour is a far cry from the days he scored those incredible number of hits - Khiladi, Sabse Bada Khiladi, Khiladiyon Ka Khiladi, Mein Khiladi Tu Anadi, Mohra etc. But now the flops have caught up with him again.

Yes, it is a grim battle ahead on the professional and personal fronts. Walking through the shambles of broken relationships and a career gradually going indifferent, Akshay has a hard time ahead.

The fault could be put at his door. He never hid his attraction for Pooja Batra first, and Raveena Tandon later. And his alleged secret marriage to Raveena would hardly have raised eyebrows in an industry used to such behaviour if his standing had been more secure. And so Akshay denies it, often futilely.

>It was only an engagement which broke up later. But excuse me, we were not married at all.

But quite a few magazines have carried details, even Raveena has been quoted as admitting it.

And there was also this lass called Nipunika he was believed to be associated with. Till her father made it clear, for some unclear reason to a film glossy, that he would not let his daughter marry a married man.

Akshay wanted to call a press conference to clarify the point but cancelled it at the eleventh hour. He decided to keep the wash linen alone.

"See it all happened like this. Once I was travelling by Jet Airways when I met Nipunika's brother, who was working with the airline. We got friendly and he invited me to visit his house at Delhi. I've been to their house four-five times. I

Nighaatha - Suspense - 3.5/5 - Available on YouTube

Nighaatha is an unique film directed by S Narayan, basically he is involved in Story/Screenplay/Dialogues etc & is very unlike anything that he has directed. Nighaatha is a dark thriller & S Narayan, known for romantic movies manages to do a complete U- turn & do justice to the theme & story. Movie has good cast with Shashikumar in leading role, with a very capable supporting characters invloving Loknath, CharanRaj & others. Madhurima in her debut role is able to hit the mark as well. Nighaatha is clearly inspired by Giallo slasher movies & imbibes all the characteristics like POV killing, dark scenes, foreboding music, etc & if you love old school slasher movies with a twist at the end you will love this. Also the kills are gratuitous & is gory for its time & really manages to get under your skin, the kills are not an easy watch & the staging of each kill is crafted superbly & you will need to double check this is a S Narayan film. Sadhu kokila as a music director is all over the place in a good way & his novel attempt gets jarring & adds to the anxiety that movie aims for. Story is perfect at first look however the timeline makes no sense, it seems like the stuff that would need several months to go ahead is covered within a week's frame, so timing is really off & its better to ignore it altogether & just go with the flow. Another issue is the sound recording, I believe I have never seen a movie that uses the noise of boots so much, even if the scene has only 2 people taking like 2 steps there is a flood of boots sound that gets comical as the movie goes on & is hard to ignore, atleast for me, the tension kept breaking as I kept hearing the boot noise go apeshit in every single scene, no idea how it passed the cut. Other than minor technical issues, movie is superbly crafted & can hold its own as one of the best thrillers from south india. It lets out a deranged killer loose & embraces a gritty slasher feel of kills & is good enough to give you nightmare at the end of the day & enjoy this filthy dark ride & ignore few technical faults in story here & there as the core of the plot is strong. Underrated gem for sure.

Ondhu shikaariya kathe - Drama - 3.5/5 - Available on Prime

Directed by Sachin shetty, Ondhu shikariya kathe is another genuine attempt from coastal region at quality cinema. Movie starts a

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

The doctor says it terminal.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

Mentos

(I will see myself out)

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.

Gender is fluid.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

But let me give it a shot.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

He’s the new temp.

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Amy

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Until he discovered it was extra sharp.

Nighaatha - Suspense - 3.5/5 - Available on YouTube

Nighaatha is an unique film directed by S Narayan, basically he is involved in Story/Screenplay/Dialogues etc & is very unlike anything that he has directed. Nighaatha is a dark thriller & S Narayan, known for romantic movies manages to do a complete U- turn & do justice to the theme & story. Movie has good cast with Shashikumar in leading role, with a very capable supporting characters invloving Loknath, CharanRaj & others. Madhurima in her debut role is able to hit the mark as well. Nighaatha is clearly inspired by Giallo slasher movies & imbibes all the characteristics like POV killing, dark scenes, foreboding music, etc & if you love old school slasher movies with a twist at the end you will love this. Also the kills are gratuitous & is gory for its time & really manages to get under your skin, the kills are not an easy watch & the staging of each kill is crafted superbly & you will need to double check this is a S Narayan film. Sadhu kokila as a music director is all over the place in a good way & his novel attempt gets jarring & adds to the anxiety that movie aims for. Story is perfect at first look however the timeline makes no sense, it seems like the stuff that would need several months to go ahead is covered within a week's frame, so timing is really off & its better to ignore it altogether & just go with the flow. Another issue is the sound recording, I believe I have never seen a movie that uses the noise of boots so much, even if the scene has only 2 people taking like 2 steps there is a flood of boots sound that gets comical as the movie goes on & is hard to ignore, atleast for me, the tension kept breaking as I kept hearing the boot noise go apeshit in every single scene, no idea how it passed the cut. Other than minor technical issues, movie is superbly crafted & can hold its own as one of the best thrillers from south india. It lets out a deranged killer loose & embraces a gritty slasher feel of kills & is good enough to give you nightmare at the end of the day & enjoy this filthy dark ride & ignore few technical faults in story here & there as the core of the plot is strong. Underrated gem for sure.

Ondhu shikaariya kathe - Drama - 3.5/5 - Available on Prime

Directed by Sachin shetty, Ondhu shikariya kathe is another genuine attempt from coastal region at quality cinema. Movie starts a