Dear XXXXXXXX;
You’re in your seventies now. It’s time to face the facts. You aren’t an indigenous person. You really aren’t. You’re not a First Nations member. You don’t qualify for a Native Blood card and you never did, no matter what pretty certificates your fellow make-believe tribe members may have given you.
What you are is a Pretendian.
A Pretendian (portmanteau of pretend and Indian) is a person who has falsely claimed Indigenous identity by claiming to be a citizen of a Native American tribal nation, or to be descended from Native ancestors. The term is a pejorative colloquialism. As a practice, being a Pretendian is considered an extreme form of cultural appropriation, especially if that individual then asserts that they can represent, and speak for, communities they do not belong to. It is sometimes also referred to as a form of ethnic fraud or race shifting.---Wikipedia
It goes back to your mother. When The Indians of New Jersey, or Dickon Among the Lenape, by M. R. Harrington came out, she was in her late teens. That is exactly when people tend to attach themselves to whatever it is they’re going to be into for the rest of their lives, whether it’s Jane Austen novels or Star Trek or chess—or being a Lenni Lenape.
Why did that idea catch fire in her brain? Well, who wouldn’t want to be a strong brown goddess of the Earth rather than a pasty-faced Pennsylvania farm girl with a troubled relationship with her mother? Her own family---your cousin LRS—admitted, sotto voce, that they weren’t Native Americans. That mysterious proof which was supposedly left to other, (unnamed) less responsible family members, who then lost or sold it--never existed.
She made it up. You knew she made things up. She told tall tales, was a ‘creative conversationalist’—was, in fact, an entertaining liar. It was one of the reasons your late husband banned her from his house.
And then she convinced you it was true.
However, it isn’t. There is nothing—absolutely nothing—in either the genealogical records of your mother’s family or in your DNA—which bears out her claims. You are more Ashkenazi than you are Native American. You are more Sub-Saharan African than Native American. You are a lot more Neanderthal than you are Native American, because you are not Native American at all.
Get one of those DNA tests. Do some basic research on Ancestry.com. You’ll find out for yourself.
Except you won’t because if it’s true, then you’ll have wasted your life
... keep reading on reddit ➡What are some Easy A / Potentially A+ classes at Cornell? Please don't respond with "A course that you enjoy" - I'm just looking for some genuinely easy A/A+ classes because a Physics and Math double major has taken its toll on my GPA.
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Hi guys.
TLDR: Xi Jinping is now in total control of the entirety of the world's capital markets.
Vix Guy here. Version with links and source work coming soon, but it looks like a theory I've been playing with might be coming to pass, so I'm putting this up, as it relates to GME and MOASS.
EDIT: IF YOU DON'T FANCY THE HISTORY AND/OR DYNASTIC SETUP, SKIP TO 'HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONS' SECTION
Thanks to u/grungromp and the mods. Your considered moderation of this sub does not go unappreciated.
Three things I'll ask you to remember. 1 - I was a professional historical researcher for a very long time for some fairly high-profile authors and documentary makers. 2 - I work in TV telling stories that are meant to be entertaining whilst existing in the realms of possibility. 3 - I've been writing this for a little while, and the situation is VERY fluid, so the most recent elements can date rapidly.
This below is a paranoid gonzo theory-based endgame OpEd based on data from credible sources, and should in no way be taken as financial advice.
China May Have Won World War 3 Without Firing a Shot - Part 1 of 2
If there’s one nation on earth that truly understands the long game, it’s China. I mean truly understands the long game. China has existed as a relatively defined territory with a unified cultural identity for more than 3600 years, a period in which Greece was pre-democratic, Sparta hadn’t yet been founded, and storytellers were conjuring the labours of Heracles and Noah.
Perhaps we can think of a nation not in geopolitical terms, but as a loose collective who share a unity of purpose, a narrative history blended from myth, lore, legend, art, born of ancient, tribal affiliations, epochs of trade and cultural transactions, and brought together by a portmanteau language and urban sprawl, being governed by their own kind who conduct diplomatic relations with foreign governments on their behalf. These loose collectives will either develop to a point where their purpose achieves greater singularity – war, trade, manufacturing – and their identity strengthens, or they will wither or fracture. Winners have strong leaders. Strong leaders have foresight. Foresight breeds dynasties. And dynasties have a tendency to think eternalistically. Obviously, most are wrong, a misapprehension usually ending with a spectacular, megadeath-scenario implosion.
Considered the founders of China, the thing that made the Shang emperors good at ruling was their ability to ap
... keep reading on reddit ➡
The Balkans are a crossroads of cultures, most of Europe and Asia has passed through and could've left some genetic material. So I was wondering if anyone has taken a DNA test. How Balkan are you?
Do your worst!
https://preview.redd.it/d4x6v3633zw71.jpg?width=2560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dbf86c75658255ffce3d42b4178caee766d6c7de
Process started around the 5th of October and 8th of October. Account number is 57XXXX passing the mod11 test.
See you on the Moon!
🦍🚀🌑
Wikipedia was launched on January 15, 2001, by Jimmy Wales[7] and Larry Sanger; Sanger coined its name as a blending of "wiki" and "encyclopedia".[8][9] Initially available only in English, versions in other languages were quickly developed. Its combined editions comprise more than 57 million articles, attracting around 2 billion unique device visits per month, and more than 17 million edits per month (1.9 edits per second).[10][11] In 2006, Time magazine stated that the policy of allowing anyone to edit had made Wikipedia the "biggest (and perhaps best) encyclopedia in the world", and is "a testament to the vision of one man, Jimmy Wales".[12]
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
Not trying to get upvotes or popularity, I just wanna see how long of a comment chain we can make. Let's do it!
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
They’re on standbi
I’m not entirely out of the fold yet still discovering, but for me it was the realisation that Islam was the primary factor for violence and failure in my country Afghanistan and many others, plus the blatant support for radicalism amongst Muslims. I called a Muslim radical he asked for proof and I said u literally picked up an AK-47 and attacked a nation and expect everyone to pat u on the back and he said that doesn’t make me a radical provide proper proof lol.
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
Or would that be too forward thinking?
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
Mine's usually Nothing to Gein from Mudvayne's first album. It has good coverage
I won't be doing that today!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
When I got home, they were still there.
