Pictured Rocks Puns

He was pretty sedimental.

That's a wyn-whin in my book.

A friend asked, “What rock is that?”

I reply, “I am not sure that rock has a name.”

My uncle chimes in.

“They wouldn't answer to their names anyway.”

It looked like foul play. The mason wasn’t a suspect. He had a concrete alibi. The night of the accident he said he was with his girlfriend. She confirmed this. There was a wall of evidence. Consequently his alibi was rock solid and not just a facade. There was damning evidence that it was the plumber. They figured his alibi, that he was at the casino, wouldn’t hold water. But cameras showed fluid betting all night. This, obviously, threw a wrench in the investigation. The investigators followed a lead to the electrician. He had a shocking secret. It seems the electrician had been charged with battery only months earlier. But it was a dead end. They looked at the HVAC installer, but his alibi was airtight. Next, they tried to nail the Roofer, as he had been spouting off about the victim the day of the accident. But the roofer had been hammered all day. There was no way they could paint him as the cunning mastermind.

Then they saw the writing on the wall: the painter had both motive and opportunity. He was seen canvassing the accident site a few strokes before midnight when the accident occurred. The victim fell off a faulty ladder that was covered in finger paint. It seems the victim and the painter had a few brush-ins before. And it wasn’t a pretty picture. The painter was indicted, but despite all the evidence, the charges didn’t stick and the jury let him roll off clean.

So we're talking and he sends me a link to the profile of a girl he's been talking to.

I look through her pictures to find an overwhelming amount of rock climbing ones.

He asks, "What do you think?"

I reply, "Well, at least she seems down to earth."

I just picture Dave Grohl riding the coaster car in his throne with his leg in a cast rocking out.

I was showing my dad some pictures from my trip to Europe. He saw a picture of a rock covered with moss and said, "I'm lichen that!"

For Christmas dinner we were having ham. The plate of carved ham was between my dad and I. Someone asked where the plate went. My dad says,"We're hoggin' it."

There was a store in my home town called carols cedar cellar. It was damaged in a flood and they knocked the building down exposing the basement. We drive by and my dad says,"Now you can cedar cellar."

I have so much to learn.

> johnmal85

> Is there a subreddit with pictures of stuff in lava or hardened like this?

> > memorizemee

>> I'd try r/lava, but its pretty much dead.

> > > confluencer

> > > So are you telling me that /r/lava has cooled down?

> > > > memorizemee

> > > > God damn it...

Sauce: http://np.reddit.com/r/bitchimabus/comments/2ctipf/bitch_i_have_been_consumed_by_molten_rock/cjiwrjy