I mean 40 something years of back pay

I'm seeing a lot of comments from people who seem to think that the only way to fix our problems is a violent revolution like 1798 in France. Besides the fact that a peoples uprising is a laughable idea against a modern military with a 700+ billion dollar budget, some commenters sound like they're fetishizing the idea of cosplaying GTA against the cops.

To be clear, I think:

• any violent uprising would be swiftly condemned not just by the state but by the general public and labelled as terrorists justifying harsh crackdown measures

• even if the cause the uprising was fighting for was just, the state would make the narrative all about the violence used to undermine the movement and vilify the people in it

• fighting cops man for man on the street would not bring about the changes we need even if the above two points were not true

• A general strike would be a far more effective way to put pressure on the politicians' corporate paymasters and therefore on politicians. That's our best bet at bringing about the changes we need. Why?

• because corporate suits have a fiduciary duty to protect shareholder profits. If enough people went on strike, or even just threatened to, they would eventually have to negotiate. Workers have always had leverage, in that their profits depend on us agreeing to cooperate.

• for the people who like to say strikes always get attacked so violence is inevitable etc - Kellogs workers just beat a corporation and got what they wanted by striking peacefully. No one attacked them. Striking or protesting while armed only increases the chance of violence, which leads back to my first three points.

TL;DR - General strike would be more effective than violence

Edit: shitty phone formatting

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

So in a thread about whether Spartans get paid, it came up how they do, and it got me thinking. Who is the real power behind Humanity? Who is actually in charge? The President of the UEG? CINCONI? CINCFLEET?

Well politically it’s obvious that the President is the statehead, but as evidenced by statements by top members of Section 3, that’s all a theater for the civilians. ONI and Fleet basically openly acknowledge that once the Covenant attacked the UNSC essentially usurped the power held by the UEG and are in a de facto military dictatorship. Which seems ultimately benign if you’re willing to play by the rules. So this absolutely means the President of the UEG is powerful, yes, but he’s a minor player when compared to UNICOM, UNSC, or ONI.

So that would logically say, it has to be Lord Admiral Hood in the driver seat of all Humanity’s future, but while incredibly astute, and powerful he acknowledges his immediate subordinates in both FLEETCOM and ONI often make a concerted effort to make runs around him, both to keep him blameless and so they can do things on the “ask forgiveness” policy. So while he’s definitely the figurehead and heroic icon of all of Humaity’s efforts to climb out of the dark shadows of the Covenant and insurrection threats, he is in a constant struggle to be the factual Crown wearer.

So naturally, it has to be the one person that can almost always do what they want, and get away with it. The Godfather of the ONI crime Family, Admiral Parangoski and then her very own Micheal Corleone, Admiral Serin Osman (born: Çelik). The architects of the Orion and Spartan programs, Prowler stealth vessels, the UNSC Infinity those who flaunt the regulations and rank structure of the UNSC at will. Those kidnappers, assassins, rogues, spies, Researchers, and Brigands. Those kings (and queens) of the navy who flit in and out of Combat Zones, secret facilities, who make deals with Sangheili terrorists, undermine the UNSC, and do all to justify their dealings so they can save humanity. Naturally they’re the ones who have actual control. The shadow guiding the will of the kings. But I submit to you that this is false. Even with the mass of power and control ONI and CINCONI have. They aren’t without someone that controls them.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I am of course talking about UNSC Procurement. Naturally Rear Admiral Saeed Shafiq is the true power. He controls who and what gets equipment, resources, and is in charge of all upgrades an

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Subtle Dark Arts

A spear thicker than his wrist punched through Ser Granyth's breastplate like it was rotten cloth. The enraged troll on the other end of it roared satisfaction, then raised one filthy foot and kicked the armored knight so hard he flew backwards into a rocky wall.

The spearhead pulled out with an audible schluuuck of crushed organs.

Fighting paused across the cavern floor as dozens of gnolls and several adventurers stared at the savagery. Rusty knives lowered in shock, then rose again with newfound energy as the twisted creatures sensed the tide of battle changing.

As Ser Granyth began slumping forward the adventurers braced themselves for retreat. The battle was hard-fought, but with their knight perished it was only a matter of time before-

"[Hold Death]," said a calm voice.

An armored foot thrust forward, halting his dying fall.

The gnolls hesitated, suddenly uncertain as their leader reared back in surprise.

"[Undying Assault]".

Loose fingers clenched, gripping a longsword already covered in orange blood and pungent bits of green flesh. A visored helmet slowly rose, dark eye slits filled with red light. He straightened, carelessly displaying an obscenely large hole through his breastplate. Blood dripped from punctured metal and something slid downward with a plop audible throughout the silent cavern.

Trolls were large. Tough. They were also, on average, slightly stupid. But this particular brute didn't claw his way to being the boss of a monster den without gaining some street smarts. When the shiny Man-thing he'd killed came off the cavern wall with unnatural speed he engaged both brain cells and made a difficult decision.

He ran.

Granyth was on him in one long, inhuman leap, whipping his longsword around with a speed Human muscles weren't supposed to have. The tide of battle flipped and within seconds fireballs and arrow shots filled the air. The gnolls broke, dropping to all fours and scurrying in every direction with frightened barks of pain.

They outlived their boss by a wide margin.

"And then I woke up, right as rain, with everyone staring down at me like a circus act!"

The excited crowd cheered the mustached knight, just as happy to hear the story for the fourth time. His destroyed chestplate was on full display next to the shirtless man, huge rents in the metal oohed and ahhed over by many an admirer. Children were already re-enacting the near-death battle between the charismatic warrior and the v

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Buenosdillas

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Nothing, he was gladiator.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

Opposition Debate Day on Government Accountability

Order, Order!

This Parliament Recognises:

1. Ministers Questions are one of the most basic forms of government scrutiny and accountability

2. This government has repeatedly completely missed MQ sessions or belatedly answered them in a press statement

3. This prevents proper scrutiny of government activities and allows them to avoid heavy scrutiny

4. This government is severely eroding the trust and accountability placed within it

5. If this pattern of behaviour were to continue, the House would be forced to explore all available options to ensure we have a government willing to make itself accountable to parliament

This Parliament therefore urges:

1. The government to ensure that there are no repeats of the mistakes made up to this point for the remainder of the term

2. If a Minister’s Questions is missed, a statement be given to the House, not the press

This Motion is brought forward by the Rt. Hon. Sir u/Chi0121 KD KT KBE MVO, Leader of the Opposition on behalf of the Official Opposition and is sponsored by Coalition!

Opening Speech:

Deputy Speaker,

In recent days the issue of accountability and transparency have raged across the House. From completely missing Minister’s Questions to the Paymaster General taking it upon themselves to answer questions without the Secretary of State’s input it’s been an embarrassing and disappointing period for the government and the people they supposedly serve.

In the most recent PMQs I sought to highlight these issues and take them directly to the Prime Minister to ensure that this poor pattern of performance ended there and then. While the Prime Minister admitted that questions hadn’t always been on time, this was okay as they were quality answers and delivered later on. They are not quality answers and this is not okay. Despite reassurances that these incidents wouldn’t happen again, the subsequent Defence MQs burnt this promise to the ground.

Hence why I had to bring this debate day forward. If the Prime Minister could not promise me that his government would follow the basic principles of accountability in PMQs then stronger methods would have to be utilised. As the Motion suggests, if the government still continues to fail in its duty there are further steps we can take to ensure that it does.

It also urges the government to release a statement to the House if for any reason they are missed rather than the